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But then again, we seem to avoid even talking to women, let alone getting naked with them.
And I'm not referring solely to approach situations.
Even after we finally introduce ourselves to a woman, talk to her on the phone, go on a few dates and even start a relationship with her we STILL don't have the deep and sometimes necessary conversations with her that we should.
What's up with that?
It's really no wonder that women harp on how we as guys can be so "distant", and on how virtually impossible it is to get us to have a real, honest-to-goodness conversation with them.
If I had to guess, I'd say one reason we tend to be like that is because women can be such talkers that we know if we engage in conversation with them, it may go on...and on...and on.
Another valid reason may be that when we do talk at length about something, it's usually about sports, cars, beer or whatever guy stuff we want to fill the blanks with.
Meanwhile, women generally aren't so good at (or interested in) making conversation about that stuff.
I also suspect that we absolutely dread that a woman is going to want to talk about our feelings, probably with a LOT of emotion involved.
By nature, we really just want to unwind and forget about stress and drama for a while.
Yeah, yeah...I've just spouted several stereotypes at you. I get that. Except that each of those scenarios really is super common. There's just no denying it.
Yet even if a woman is the exception to the norm in every one of those ways, the fact remains that we somehow STILL tend to avoid talking to women about some truly important things.
Even when they REALLY should be brought up.
Even when we allegedly REALLY care about her.
For some reason, we tend to stick our head in the sand like an ostrich when issues come up, knowing full well they won't go away.
When she does something that's really turning us off--possibly even killing our attraction for her--maybe we stay silent about it.
If our boss has informed us that we've got to travel to a business meeting in Detroit on the same day we've made plans to have dinner with her, perhaps we don't exactly know how to tell her so.
Instead of having the all-important STD talk before the first time we have sex with her, most of us clam up...lest we "ruin the moment".
And when the time comes that we think it's time to break up, some of us simply disappear without a trace. No call, not even a text.
Weirdly, it's not like the issue doesn't eventually come up.
And when it does, it has usually escalated to a fever pitch by then. Yet all we can do at that point is mumble something to the effect of, "Yeah, well...I was meaning to talk to you about that."
Let's face it. Women may very well have a point when they vent their collective frustration about how getting us to communicate is like pulling teeth.
That frustration comes from their burning desire to have us LEAD, yet we run away and hide.
Instead of making them feel safe and secure, we leave them with a bunch of question marks. When they don't have any idea what we're thinking, they get uneasy about most everything.
Further, when we lack the boldness to state what's on our mind, that strikes them as the exact OPPOSITE of confidence.
Add it all up and you can easily conclude that a man of real, solid character wouldn't act that way. He'd say what needs to be said, when it needed to be said.
We do so even though we may be fully aware that it's KILLING our level of success with women.
Why do we do that? If we can figure that out, we can address the problem and crush it for good.
Here's what I think. I firmly believe we as guys avoid talking to women--especially about difficult or "politically loaded" subject matter--because of FEAR.
We're wusses. And what we fear is HER emotional reaction.
Not one of us, as decent, well-meaning men, wants to find himself responsible for making a woman cry. And if we do, we most certainly don't want to be present to see it happen.
Moreover, we really want to avoid getting a woman upset, worried or traumatized in any way, shape or form. We know all too well that those are lose/lose situations.
So when faced with the legitimate need to have a serious conversation with a woman about something, we weigh the cost of potentially stirring up so much emotion versus the cost of simply avoiding the issue.
The latter almost always wins, at least in the moment.
But here's the deal.
You may remember how I've told you in the past that a shocking number of guys avoid approaching women on account of fearing "rejection", even when they've never really put the matter to the test.
But in reality, were they to actually TRY approaching a woman, they'd likely see it's not so "dangerous" and that women are really friendly.
Well, I believe that approaching a potentially sticky conversation is similar in many ways.
The truth is that if you're dealing with an emotionally stable woman (and I trust they're the only ones you'd build a relationship with) you might discover something amazing were you to actually open up to her.
That's this: She can handle the truth.
I can remember when this revelation hit me like a lightning bolt between the eyes.
One day, back when I started seeing some success at dating multiple women at once, I realized I had to narrow the field.
Not wanting to wimp out and simply disappear like other guys seem to, I decided to go ahead tell women straight-up when it was time for them to find another guy who would appreciate them more than I ever could.
Essentially, I took them at face value based on how many times I'd heard them repeat how irked they were when men just vanished on them without a trace.
I was shocked by the results.
Although some were disappointed, others were actually perfectly okay with splitting up.
Importantly, even over the course of a few years and dozens of women not one of them went off on me like a bottle-rocket. For certain, none of them hated me afterward.
Some even THANKED me for being honest with them. Others told me that I was the most up-front guy they'd ever dated, and told me I should write a book for other guys on how to be like that (seriously).
So what's the takeaway? Only this: Don't fear the conversation.
Go ahead and throw on the table whatever needs to be discussed, and watch in awe as women actually find you MORE attractive as a direct result.
What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!