Tweet
You can even get a great report on how to get the first date AND ace it right there on my main website.
But what you don't hear about very often are the ways that so many of us tend to blow it on second dates.
Here are seven classic blunders to avoid the second time you meet up with a woman, even if the first date went perfectly well:
1) Going to the exact same place and/or doing the same exact thing on the second date as you did on the first date
It's a safe guess that one of the two might not stick around for the third go-round at crashing on the couch... Then watching Netflix... After going to Chili's... Again.
2) Letting one's guard down too fast
Some people are arrogant enough to believe that if they survived the first date, then they're automatically "in"...regardless.
But that can all be based on a false sense of security.
Beware: Sometimes a woman will go on a 2nd date even if she's on the fence about the guy, hoping things will go better. It could be that she was actually ready to throw in the proverbial towel, but a girlfriend talks her into giving the guy "another chance".
I'm not suggesting that one shouldn't be authentic, but hey...realizing that there's a "dance" stage early on only proves that you get it and that you have a modicum of social skill.
At the very least, realize it's probably not safe to fart in front of her yet. That's a nice start.
3) Sexpectations
Yes, if a second date is happening there's likely some attraction. But it's a mistake to think that automatically means it's time to "get physical".
You've got to look for clues from her that she's ready to get touchy-feelie and THEN you've got to interpret them correctly.
Despite what you've heard from the "ten minute seduction" crowd, women are all different and they therefore move at different paces--even depending on the guy they're with.
Which reminds me of what can happen at the other end of the spectrum...
4) Missing "kiss me" clues
We as men in particular are infamous for not catching women's subtle signals that they're ready for the first kiss to happen.
When men blow this one women are often left either confused or humiliated. That's not ever going to end well.
Elaborating on exactly what those clues are would be the subject of a whole special report in its own right (hint), but for now let's just say that if she ever asks, "So...have you ever thought about kissing me?" it's probably time to kiss her.
5) Assuming there's a "relationship" already
The stereotype with regard to this phenomenon points to women, but it's really not necessarily gender specfic at all.
Basically, some people are so ready to get into an exclusive relationship that they slip into "lockdown mode" after just one successful date.
I mean, assuming that the third date is going to happen may be a stretch, let alone having this person join you for your nephew's bar mitzvah in three weeks.
But perhaps the most breathtaking rendition of this is when someone starts talking about the far-flung future. Marriage? Babies? Growing old together?
There's no faster way to make the other person run away.
Well, except perhaps THIS...
6) Surprise introductions to friends, family and perhaps even (gasp) kids
Not only is it unfair to put someone you barely know on the spot like this, it's a jawdropping display of inappropriate assumptions at almost every level.
What self-respecting single parent would invite someone over to his or her home for a first meeting and spring their little kids on them? More of them than you think.
7) Dr. Natural and Mr. Nice Guy
I've saved the most insidious one for last.
Weirdly (even to me, your fellow brother-in-arms), some guys who are perfectly cool, calm and collected on first dates tend to have some sort of "Jekyll and Hyde" thing overcome them on second dates.
The masculine, easy-going guy somehow morphs into a needy, clingy "Mr. Nice Guy" once he senses that an attractive woman might actually be legitimately interested in him.
Fearing loss, he freaks out psychologically and decides he's got to do more than what he did on the first date. He's got to spend more money, give her more of what she allegedly wants and generally jack her pedestal up higher.
All this ends up doing, of course, is draining all the attraction she may have been feeling from her tank.
Gentlemen, why do we do this? Stick with what worked to get you to the second date to begin with. And for what it's worth, keep doing exactly that...on the third date and beyond.
So there you have it. I could probably have thought of a few more, but my brain is already on fire. I may need a few shots of Maker's Mark to numb the painful memories. Geez.
What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!