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But last Sunday night, a flat-out wild realization hit me like a bolt of lightning while my wife and I were out at...well...a bar.
There really is at least one angle of this whole "bars & clubs" schtick that I've never heard talked about anywhere.
That's what I can only call, "karaoke game", believe it or not.
That's right, meeting women at karaoke bars--the American kind, at least, where you actually sing in front of a group of other people who are there to have a good time.
So what caused this epiphany?
Well, basically my wife and I have both known for quite sometime that karaoke joints tend to be naturally more social places than most bars.
This is understandable. After all, you're in an "interactive" setting where the audience is self-generating the entertainment.
This makes fellow co-participants want to talk amongst themselves, all the while congratulating or even co-conspiring with each other.
Sunday night was no different...except for two key events.
First of all, there was the decidedly average woman who booted herself at least two notches up any man's raw attraction scale upon belting out the World's Hottest Rendition of Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats".
As a red-blooded man who drives a 4x4 pickup with leather interior, that got my attention.
Shortly thereafter, something even more mind-bending happened.
A few minutes after completing my first "number"--a particularly soulful one that nobody could have predicted I'd go for--my wife had several decidedly hot young women tap her on the shoulder, gaze longingly into her eyes and say something to the effect of, "Oh... that was so dreamy. How come my boyfriend can't be like YOURS?"
As if that wasn't shocking enough, the looks and comments actually RAMPED UP as the night progressed. My wife's "perfectly imperfect" take on Gwen Stefani singing "Hella Good" didn't hurt.
Neither did hearing every chick's voice in the place singing along with my hard-practiced "Jumper" by Third Eye Blind.
So it hit me: Karaoke "game"--when strategized and executed correctly--has got to be the most naturally effective version of "night game" imaginable.
Seriously. Get this right, and men and women BOTH can practically own the whole place, driving "interest-level" on the part of the opposite gender so rambunctiously in the process that people are practically throwing numbers and e-mail addresses.
Let's break it down. First, here's WHY karaoke is the "perfect storm" for meeting MOTOS (members of the opposite sex):
2) You cause every hottie in the room to NOTICE YOU, even as you get this done without any shred of NEEDINESS whatsoever.
3) You get MAD SOCIAL PROOF without begging for approval (just for showing up, really...even if you're verifiably terrible).
4) Everyone understands you have a REAL PERSONALITY and that you might actually be FUN to hang out with.
5) You get to make eye contact with whomever you want from up there--all while in a position of leadership over the whole room.
Wait a minute...all of those bullet points sound familiar. If my head is on straight, all of the above steps read like the basics of creating attraction. And all in one simple step? Are you KIDDING ME?
No, I am most certainly not kidding you.
Remember, however, that I did complicate matters by mentioning that both STRATEGY and EXECUTION have to be on-point. Otherwise, it ain't happenin' for you.
So now that you know WHY it all works so well, here's HOW to make it all work in your favor:
1) Get Up There
You have to participate in order to reap the benefits. And here's the best part: You DO NOT have to know how to sing.
Think about it. There are people you can name off the top of your head who have record contracts and can't carry a tune in a bucket.
The strategy? Pick songs by those people! (Duh.)
Now, on the other hand, if you were the star of your high-school choir and/or you can sing along to the radio in the car like a freakin' rock star...I don't want to hear any more excuses.
The world is yours on a silver platter here. Sack up.
2) Plan Your "Set" Ahead Of Time
It's important to pick a few songs you think you could theoretically nail to the floor ahead of time.
Then, get on iTunes and drop a lousy buck for each one. Play them ten times in a row until you've got them down STONE COLD.
I know one guy who truly can't sing, but has some Weird Al song down so ridiculously that he brings the house down with it every time.
There's another dude I know who's can throw down "Kiss" by Prince and "Insane In The Membrane" like a badass. As it turns out those are the ONLY two songs he does, and he's done them both about 1000 times each.
Practice...it's worth it. Smoothness rocks even over raw talent in most cases.
3) Mix It Up
Say you decide you feel comfortable with a particular hip-hop tune.
Next time you get up there, sing something completely different.
Going from rock-station anthem to R & B classic works particularly well.
Whatever the case, work hard to have at least one slower, libido- inspiring arrow in the proverbial quiver of tunes in your repertoire.
If you are summarily freaked out by even getting up there for now, this can wait. But work towards it.
4) If You Already Have A Date, Sing To Her
One time I busted out with "Sara Smile" to a woman named Sara, who I'm pretty sure still talks to her friends about it even though the guy who did it is now married--to someone else.
What made the whole gig even more poignant is that there was NO CHANCE of guessing that a guy like me would pull that one out of the ether. Jaws dropped. Nice.
5) Bring Energy
You've heard that you need to bring high energy when meeting women. This is no exception. In fact, "energy" equals "awesome" a shockingly high percentage of the time.
On valuable pointer here is to gauge the "mood" of the room and pick a song that fits in rather than throwing a wrench in the works.
In other words, if everyone seems to be singing '80s hair band songs, you might want to save the Kenny Chesney tune for some other time.
6) Collaborate And Be Social
Are you beginning to see how this can be like "shooting fish in a barrel"? Just leave the guns home.
7) Dance To Other People's Songs
My wife and I did this--when nobody else had--and what do you know...everyone else joined us.
Not only do you show some leadership when you do this, you validate whoever is on stage.
Make friends, influence people, create attraction.
By now, you may be thinking, "How come I never figured any of this out before?"
If you are like most, it's because you've long ago ruled out any chance of anyone dragging you on stage. Get over it, and watch amazing things happen.
Do you have any question? Leave it below and I'll reply.