Recently I had the pleasure of visiting over Skype with one of the most well-known female dating experts in the world.
Well, one of the topics that came up while we were casually chatting was the idea of women as "divine goddesses".
No doubt, that sort of imagery is widely-used in a sort of new agey way with female audiences far and wide, presumably to help empower women vis-a-vis the pandemic phenomenon of low-self- esteem among women.
Now I personally have no problem with empowering women and doing something about rampant LSE. That is absolutely necessary.
But "divine goddess"? Come on.
Never mind the fact that equating oneself with deity is shaky ground to begin with. That goes without saying.
The real danger here, apparently unbeknownst to a TON of women's dating experts, is that A LOT of guys are already pre-programmed to believe and act as if women REALLY ARE some sort of "higher power".
Simply put, whether women are ready to believe they are "divine goddesses" or not, WE really don't need any extra convincing.
But the fact remains the same no matter what: Women are no more superhuman than we are as guys. Period.
And to be perfectly frank with you, encouraging us men to put women on an even HIGHER pedestal is counter-productive to everyone involved anyway.
That's right. Even as the "lady gurus" purveying this sort of thought believe themselves to be empowering women, they may in fact be perpetuating the cycle of dating frustration...for both men AND women.
Here's why.
For starters, need I belabor the point that pre-approval of any particular woman (let alone women in general) as summarily "out of our league" is tantamount to CERTAIN FAILURE?
You've got to be a CHOOSER instead of a CHASER, or else any woman will find herself DISINTERESTED to the core...perhaps without even knowing why.
Why? Well granted, it just might have been that mix disc you so painstakingly prepared for her the day after meeting her, probably containing such gems as "She's So High" in the playlist.
And even if you're more subtle about your "worship", the woman will be left thinking for some reason that you were flat-out too easy to catch, and maybe she could do better.
'Nuff said about that.
But I would contend that even WE as guys get crossed up in the attraction department when we fall for the "women are goddesses" meme.
By that I mean we can potentially become as DISAPPOINTED and FRUSTRATED with women as they are with us. Really.
Think of it this way.
Let's say you look across the room and behold what you are instantly sure is the image of female perfection.
And right then and there you place her among the pantheon of "goddesses".
Now, as infinitesimal the odds are of her actually being attracted to you when you've got that attitude on, let's give you the benefit of the doubt for the sake of argument here.
As such, you actually get a first meeting with said "goddess".
And accordingly, you expect utter perfection. I mean, that only follows logically, correct?
So from the outset you pile the pressure on yourself to match up as her "Mr. Perfect", lest the slightest misstep derail everything.
Strike one. She's following your lead...right into the pressure cooker.
And guess what? She may or may not consider herself to fall under the "goddess" classification, making matters worse.
But either way, layer that ridiculous amount of self-imposed pressure on HER part on top of yours. Wow...I can cut the negative tension with a knife just THINKING about it. Strike two.
And then, the unthinkable happens. She FAILS YOU in some way.
ANY way.
Maybe it comes out that she's not the image of virginal purity you assumed a "goddess" would be. Welcome to the mother of all "madonna/whore" complexes.
OR...maybe she ends up not having the amount of knowledge of and/or interest in a particular subject that is deeply important to you. And you're deflated like a flat tire.
OR...maybe she stinks up the bathroom at your apartment one night when you're cooking dinner with her.
Strike three.
Any woman (or any human being on Earth) simply cannot measure up to a yardstick of perfection, can she?
So now you see why EVERYONE LOSES when we have "goddess like" expectations when it comes to women.
I mean, the chances of any of us even GETTING A DATE with a high-quality woman are next to nil to begin with when we think like that.
But how depressing is it to think that we're pretty much CRATERING everyone's chances at any semblance of happiness even if we DO create initial attraction on her part?
So c'mon "lady gurus"...how about turning your attention to empowering women in the context of being real human beings, without setting both they and the guys they meet up for failure?
And as for us, it's all-important to maintain the level-headed view that even the most attractive women on Earth are HUMAN, just like us.
Let that sink in, and you'll find your interactions with women to be WAY less pressure-packed...and WAY more enjoyable.
So once again, there you have yet another arrow in your quiver when it comes to going from GOOD to GREAT with women.
What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
Google Adsense
Collapse
Announcement
Collapse
No announcement yet.
Is She Really A "Goddess"?
Collapse
MillionaireMatch
Collapse