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Once I soldiered through the first couple of rough years learning the ropes, the day finally came where I fully realized I had the system down in a way few other guys could hang with.
From there, it was all about selecting the absolute hottest women in San Antonio, TX from the menu of Match.com options, writing about ten of them at a time and fully expecting to hear back from six to eight of them.
Then I'd move them to the phone, decide who my absolute favorites were and then meet them in person.
Ultimately, it got to where I used online dating to "raise the bar" from good to great.
Any time I decided to give one of the women I was dating the "Just Be Friends" talk, I casually logged in and found myself in front of more potential women to bring into my life than I could ever handle.
And then yes...one day I stumbled upon Emily's bright, sunny smile on my computer screen and the rest is history.
I have to confess something to you, though...maybe for the first time ever. I really didn't want to quit online dating once I met Emily.
It's not that I wasn't sure I had found the right woman for me, it's just that when you work so hard at something and finally get really good at it, it's no fun to just suddenly give it up...cold turkey.
I found out first-hand what professional athletes must feel like after they've played their last game. And it sort of sucked.
So what did I do? Well, I did EXACTLY what so many of those very same NBA guys do when they've "retired" from the game.
I became a coach instead.
This is a big part of why I LOVE my job so much. I get to keep doing the online dating thing, except now I get to empower a TON of other guys like you toward even greater success than I ever dreamed of.
This has made me into somewhat of an online dating "mad scientist" over the past eleven years, to be honest. It's no wonder that Online Dating Domination 2.0 has now become the most stacked program I've ever done in terms of content.
Well, being as quasi-obsessed with this stuff as ever, the gears in my head never stop turning.
So every time I get on the phone with one of you guys for an Online Dating Success Package, it's almost inevitable that something BRAND NEW comes up.
Here are the latest three...hot off the press.
For your convenience, I've given you one that's out-of-the-box practical, another that represents a more overarching mindset shift, and a third that's an elaboration on something I've been teaching for years.
Enjoy...
1) GIVER WOMEN A SIMPLE REMINDER (NOT WHAT YOU THINK)
Remember always, the main point of your online dating profile is NOT to do all the heavy lifting. It's not even really to generate sexual attraction.
The ONLY thing it has to do is create enough INTRIGUE to move the interaction forward.
If you want a simple, reusable way to make it impossible for a woman to resist getting in contact with you, drop this simple line in your profile or first e-mail to her:
"Remind me to tell you the story of when..."
After the ellipsis, fill in a quick teaser for the most preposterous story you've got. Swing for the fence.
In other words, "...got lost in a snowstorm in Lapland" is a good one. "...got kidnapped by the Zeta cartel for crossing their main guy in Nuevo Laredo", not so much.
2) TELL INCOMPLETE STORIES...ABOUT EVERYTHING
A massive mistake that men in particular make online is that they tell their entire life story, from beginning to end.
I've seen first e-mails to women that would make Leo Tolstoy jealous.
Seriously, spending over an hour custom-crafting a tome of literature to a woman you've never even met before isn't only creepy, it surgically removes ANY semblance of intrigue from the picture.
The latter is perhaps the greater evil, believe it or not.
So from now on, tweak your mindset as such: NEVER give a woman the whole story about ANYTHING, either in your online profile or in your e-mail correspondence to her.
Instead of telling a complete tale in your profile, start a half dozen or so incomplete threads instead. Give women something to wonder about.
Leave room for a real conversation (and a potentially interesting one, no less) to happen in the future.
The only caveat is that you do indeed have to START the ball of intrigue rolling with SOMETHING interesting.
Think of it this way. Which woman is more intriguing to you? Is it the one who has no pictures at all? Or is it the one who has six pictures of her sexy self--all with a completely different look?
You have no real idea what EITHER of them is going to look like, but only the latter one really compels you to care, right?
3) QUIT RIPPING-OFF MY PILLOW FIGHT EXAMPLE, ALREADY
Actually, I don't really mind. I realize it's pretty good.
Not only have hundreds (if not thousands) of guys used it almost verbatim in their own respective profiles, I've even had to send a "cease and desist" letter to another fairly well-known dating guru who was teaching it as if it were his own.
I'm talking of course, about the magical line in my Match.com profile: "If you start a pillow fight with me on a Sunday morning, you'll get the trouble you're looking for."
If you want to use it, go for it. However, what if you could come up with something completely original but just as powerful?
That would be even better, right?
Well, here's how to do that.
First off, the "magic" of the pillow fight example isn't really in the pillows, you see. It's all in the mental picture you're planting in a woman's mind.
The combination of inviting her playful side, sub-communicating your own sexually-charged nature in a somewhat subtle, engaging way AND setting off a more rambunctious sexual chain-reaction in her mind is what's really important.
As such, if you want to come up with an equally effective example for your own purposes, ask yourself this: "What's the very first step of the fantasy?"
In other words, what's the "PG rated" prelude to what's quickly and inevitably going to move in the "R rated" direction?
Using that logic, I can off the top of my head come up with a gem like this:
"Let's go shoot pool for fun. If you want, I'll show you how to make a perfect bank shot...as long as you promise not to distract me (much)."
Do you see what I did there? The image of a man helping a woman learn how to shoot pool is iconically flirtatious. It's easy to connect the proverbial dots and see how that simple billiards lesson might rapidly degenerate into something much naughtier.
Describe the first step, and then let HER think about how she's going to subtly stick her tail section out as you "help her"...just enough for you to know what's going on.
Go ahead and give her some credit. She'll already be thinking about both of you on TOP of the pool table.
So there you have it. Go and use those three tips to meet some women online tonight.
What did I miss? Leave it in the comments.