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Indeed, for years I've been talking about how the "Too Good To Be True Factor" influences us to talk ourselves out of success with women before even giving them a chance to form their own opinion on the matter.
Because success is so hard to imagine as reality, we automatically assume it CAN'T happen. Therefore, we sabotage ourselves just to make sure we're right about that.
Pretty sick, isn't it?
But sometimes we as guys will even go so far as to interpret POSITIVE signs as NEGATIVES.
These cases are the most tragic ones because the woman herself is left wondering what the heck just happened.
Basically, both people lose out on getting to know each other...even though they actually WANTED that to happen. He makes a wholly incorrect assumption, and she ends up feeling "rejected".
Man, what a tangled web we weave, huh?
Well, here's a primo example of an indicator of solid interest that most guys misinterpret as a put-off.
That's when a woman starts telling you how many guys she has interested in her....especially if she makes it a point to do so.
Just to clear the air up front, I'll be the first to throw on the table that it's a mistake for a woman to do that. I mean, it's a bad idea for anyone--woman OR man--to say or do anything that's likely to be misconstrued socially.
But rest assured nonetheless, women really have no idea you're taking such statements as code for, "Hey, get lost...I have enough guys trying to hit on me already. They'll never get anywhere, and you won't either."
Unless she's as overtly blunt and negative about the matter as in the example above, you should open your eyes to a potentially different interpretation of what she's saying...a radically different one, yet most likely the intended one.
You see, it's overwhelmingly probable that she's bringing the matter to your attention in an attempt to increase her value in your eyes.
That's because she LIKES YOU and hopes you'll LIKE HER.
Let me illustrate this for you.
If you're from the US or the UK and have ever rented a car elsewhere (e.g. Europe, the Pacific Rim or the Middle East) you'll quickly notice something as you try to find familiar music on the radio dial.
People in non-English speaking countries really do love American and British pop music.
BUT...they're about six months to a year behind. And when they decide they like a particular song they REALLY, REALLY like it.
Welp, several years ago when we did a road trip around southern Europe the French and the Spaniards had just discovered "Call Me Maybe" by Carli Rae Jepson.
Good God Man. We couldn't avoid that shiznit for 2000 miles worth of roadtripping. International borders couldn't even ease the pain.
Between that, "Gangnam Style", some Justin Bieber song and "Scream & Shout" you'd be led to believe these stations had a four song rotation...at least until they'd break stride with three songs by Bruno Mars in a row, invariably punctuated by "Someone Like You" by Adele. Geez.
OK, so making lemonade out of lemons, I did make one interesting observation. Check out this lyric from what's an otherwise completely worthless, overproduced pop monstrosity with a distinctly random, incoherent flow to it:
"And all the other boys try to chase me, but here's my number...so call me, maybe?"
Aha...see that? The girl clearly likes the guy...a LOT. And before giving him her number, she drops EXACTLY the kind of line I'm talking about here.
Rhetorically speaking, it goes without saying that she's NOT hoping the guy "gets lost".
So like other women who would have us know how popular they are with other dudes, she's attempting to tap into the power of perceived social proof to gain approval from him also.
You know, just in case he isn't yet in the fold with those who quickly adore her.
Can you see how that's working there?
After all, as all good salespeople know, "people buy on the approval of others".
Following logically, you can now see that it's all nothing more than good old-fashioned approval seeking.
Yes...it's of the same ill-advised type that tends to make people look needy or even desperate when overplayed.
There you have another reason why women probably shouldn't play that particular card.
But alas, they do. And they sure LOVE to, don't they?
Well, from now on you'll know what she's REALLY trying to tell you when that happens.
What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!