Tweet
By now you know all too well that being a wussified milquetoast is not attractive to women at all.
The very essence of what ignites femininity is directly tied to facing fear with courage, coming up with a plan when crisis hits and being a protector when danger and uncertainty loom.
And, well...you just can't be any of those things if you're cowering in the corner, now can you?
Most of us will never be faced with storming Osama Bin Laden's camp in Pakistan, landing an airliner in the Hudson River or fending off a pack of wild tigers in the Sri Lankan jungle.
That's all well and good, but you will need to be able to get through normal, everyday life in 21st-century post-modern culture.
For better or worse, life in that context presents nearly constant challenges to "man up"...even if they're small or even subtle ones.
Nevertheless, you can bet your bottom dollar that women are watching.
In this two part series on the subject, I'm going to present to you ten very basic, common ways to tell with almost 100% certainty what kind of man you are.
Do you possess even a modicum of the masculine bravery that indicates to a woman that you're a leader, provider and a protector?
Or are you just a frightened shell of a man...a passive follower who runs from every potential challenge?
Here are the first five "simple tests". Perhaps the first should be based on whether you have the guts to even read on vs. folding up and hitting "delete" without even facing what follows, right?
But seriously...ah, what the heck. Take a deep breath and go for it...
1. Popcorn Bags
When you make a bag of popcorn, can you fish the bag out of the microwave when it's done, open it, pour out the contents into a bowl without either using an oven mitt or repeating a staccato chorus of "Ow! Ow! Ow!" the whole time?
Can you crumple up the bag a couple of seconds later without flinching, or do you have to blow into it and bounce it around in the air for half a minute before doing so?
Here's the truth. A bag of popcorn is hot, but when handled according to the directions it's not hot enough to fry your fingers. And yes, you really can crumple up the empty bag immediately without injuring yourself.
You can also survive having to take a cold shower if you have to, as well as walking a mile in 100 degree heat with a gas can or jump-starting your neighbor's car on a cold winter morning.
Only wimps can't handle reasonable (read: not dangerous) deviations in temperature.
Don't you dare stick your toe in that swimming pool first if others are already happily enjoying themselves in it. Dive right in, man.
2. Going To The Doctor
I don't know what it is about going to the doctor that strikes such fear in men's hearts, but we'd better get over it if we know what's good for us.
When something isn't quite right with your health, you know it. And that means you also instinctively know that you need to go see a doctor.
Yet a huge percentage of men bury their heads in the sand, pretend nothing is going on and that whatever's ailing them will go away on it's own.
This isn't only dangerous and irresponsible, it's freaking wimpy to the extreme.
Any woman can see that your fear is keeping you from taking the best care of yourself you could. Therefore, you're also not improving the likelihood that you'll continue to be there for her and your future family.
She isn't impressed.
3. Public Whining
Children are best known for whining, particularly spoiled and undisciplined ones.
Some men never grow up. They continue to fuss, complain and create drama at the first sign of inconvenience or bother all through their adult lives.
Not coincidentally, these are usually the same men who are dateless, often without ever realizing why.
Simply put, real men never verbalize their reticence or discomfort toward what they already know needs to be done.
They simply nut up and take care of business. This is like catnip to women.
Notably, whining is not to be confused with boldly standing up to injustice, manipulation or the like.
If you're ever accused of "whining" by someone whose B.S. you've just called out, you can let that go in one ear and out the other.
4. Varmints
Here it is: If there's a spider in the house, it's you who needs to deal with it.
You get extra points for doing the deed without nervously squashing otherwise innocent critters simply because they've been found outside of their natural habitat.
The general rule is that if the thing is legitimately dangerous (i.e. scorpion, brown recluse, etc.) then you smash it.
Otherwise, you get some toilet paper, coax it into your grasp and toss it outside.
Nobody is saying you have to go all Dominic Monaghan on cobras, Komodo dragons or cave tarantulas. But you should be okay with catching and removing toads, lizards and other small and harmless creatures.
Even more bonus points are yours if you can catch harmless garden snakes...if only for personal enjoyment. Just don't "surprise" your girlfriend with them or anything.
5. Flat Tires
Do you know how to change a flat tire? You should, because it's not going to end well for you if she has to do it while you stand there watching helplessly.
In other words, she'd better not have to break a nail because you were unwilling to get your hands dirty. Sorry, but that's how she'd look at it.
It's even more to your credit if you actually look forward to changing one, even if in the back of your mind you're miffed by the inconvenience and the cost of fixing or replacing the thing.
Contrast a guy like that with the quiet majority who don't even know how to find all the pieces to the jack their car came equipped with, let alone how to use it.
I've known guys with full-size pickup trucks who were completely nonplussed as to how to release the spare from where it's stored below the bed...if they could even find it at all.
6) Driving A Stick Shift
If you're physically sitting anywhere other than the United States while reading this, you're probably already scratching your head.
Nevertheless, I remain shocked by the number of guys in this country, at least, who are stopped dead in their tracks if confronted with the requirement to pilot any motor vehicle that's not equipped with an automatic transmission.
I don't care if you're a "car nut" or not, this is important.
Why?
Well, first there's the simple fact that anything cool to drive in this life is better with a manual transmission. That includes 4x4s, motorcycles, and sports cars.
If you're out rock-hopping in Moab, Utah with an automatic Jeep, don't come crying to me when that doesn't work out for you. (Do they even MAKE Jeeps with automatics?)
Manual transmissions make life more fun when you know how to use one.
But far more importantly, there's going to come a day--sometime soon, if it hasn't happened already--where you're going to be called upon to "save the day" by driving someone else's car. It might even be an emergency.
If, once you jump into the driver's seat, the very next thought that crosses your mind is, "Oh $#!%, what do I do NOW?" then you're going to be nobody's hero.
And that's usually when some chick orders you to "get out of the frickin' driver's seat before someone gets hurt", leaving you standing there while she whizzes off effortlessly.
Don't let THAT be the moment that finally persuades you to spend an hour or two in the empty corner of the mall parking lot with a borrowed '87 Sentra.
For what it's worth, I'd even recommend taking a few private pilot lessons...you know, just in case you're ever called upon to land a plane in an emergency. But hey, that's just the way I think.
7) Trying New Foods
Here's what some women do when a completely new, exotic or somewhat challenging culinary delicacy is placed before them.
They take their little finger and tentatively jab at it with utmost care, so as only to coat the tip of said finger with about twelve molecules of the "lab sample" at hand.
It's as if they're playing "Operation" with it.
Then, they stick out the tip of their tongue and reprise the tentative jabbing motion until about three of the twelve anointed molecules have actually invaded their oral cavity.
I have no idea how any woman gets any idea of how something really tastes by doing that, so I therefore have no idea how YOU would either.
So don't do that. Take a bite of the stuff already and be done with it.
You're welcome to have a napkin ready in case the process requires reversing. Nobody's telling you that you have to actually swallow any nasty food. That would have nothing to do with being brave, that would just be crazy and/or stupid.
8) Shots
Nope, I'm not talking about how many "Jaeger Bombs" you can pound down.
I'm talking about what typically goes on at the doctor's office.
Assuming you can get past #2 from yesterday, the next major cause of much weeping and gnashing of teeth within the medical realm is the dreaded injection.
I promise you with all my heart that the anticipation of whatever pain it causes is MUCH, MUCH greater than the actual pain.
Consciously put that theory to the test the next time you get blood work done or get a flu vaccine.
For what it's worth, you should probably get over your phobia of dentists too. Like blood tests, dental work is on the list of life's inevitabilities.
Oh yeah, and when the opportunity presents itself just rip off a bandage in one fell swoop too, please. And get on with it, already. The sooner it's over with the better.
9) Standing Up To Customer Service Departments
If you've paid good money for something and you're being treated ridiculously in return, you should make your displeasure known in a civil but nevertheless direct manner.
Don't let someone who has had more training and experience than you at dealing with irate customers EVER, EVER guilt you into believing you're the problem if you have a legitimate point.
If you've paid for something, you're the customer and the person selling you the product works for you. Don't ever let that common, natural fact get clouded by manipulation.
Granted, you've got to make sure you have a valid point and you've definitely got to give the other side a legit chance to make things right.
But make no mistake, this is another area where women watch how you handle things VERY carefully. If you're either a doormat or a crybaby you're not going to come off as a man who knows how to provide and protect.
Be reasonable and direct when there's an honest concern, and remain steadfast until it's resolved. You can't go wrong that way.
10) Resisting Immature Provocation
I've saved the most significant one for last.
What we're talking about here is remaining cool under fire when someone (or even something) royally pisses you off.
The baseline fact underscoring this entire thought is this: Whoever raises his voice and/or loses emotional control first in ANY situation is the one who LOSES.
And losers are usually the ones who lacked confidence, composure and/or sheer balls compared to the prevailing victor.
In other words, they wimped out.
Show the world that you expect to be respected and that you will not kowtow to immaturity or foolishness of any kind.
Pick your battles wisely and rarely, saving your energy for true life and death situations.
Oh, and if you're actually the one instigating immature confrontations and other overreactions, you're advertising your wussiness to the world to an exponentially higher degree.
So, how did you do?
In case you happen to be expecting some sort of "grading scale", I've got some news for you. This exercise is "pass/fail", and the only passing grade is a 100%.
There's no chance of grading on a curve, either. You've got to get all of this stuff right.
The good news is that all of the examples I've shared are completely within the realm of your personal control. Did you notice that?
The only question that remains now is this: Are you willing to "man up"...especially if it leads to much greater success with women?
What did I miss? Leave it in the comments.