Okay, I'm not going to go on that rant. But chalk that brief outburst up to my pet peeve regarding how diamonds are marketed so heavily anytime there's a holiday around.
Here's the real point. The de rigueur stance among stylish dating experts these days tends to be to blast Valentine's Day and everything it stands for with every bit of raw firepower the arsenal can support.
Me? I'm thinking I'm still on the fence about it all.
I mean, maybe Valentine's Day can be kind of "nice", but only if you are in a steady relationship.
Well, as long as that's a happy, fulfilling relationship.
And THEN only if your significant other isn't, well, a selfish narcissist who packs a smokin' "entitlement-ality".
And ONLY if you are in the particularly ill-advised and ineffective habit of depending on a calendar to tell you when it's time to stoke things up with some extra passion and romance.
But then again, THAT would only mean you're probably trying to force-feed warm, fuzzy, romantic feelings into a specific time and place instead of letting them happen naturally and spontaneously...
...which never ends well.
So wait a minute, that can only mean that NOBODY (except for opportunistic women...and that's a BIG "maybe") really benefits from Valentine's Day, huh?
Okay, so well...um...I tried to be optimistic here. But you can see how that's nearly impossible.
Therefore, I'm in solidarity with all the other stylish dating coaches, I suppose.
The truth is Valentine's Day confronts us with a major crater in our schedule that demands to be filled.
Either that, or the opposite--a massive obstacle that must be overcome.
What do I mean?
Well obviously, anyone who is dateless on (or around) Valentine's Day is likely pouring mostly imagined social pressure on him or (especially) herself. That's obvious.
But even people who are living wildly successful dating lives are faced with a potentially serious plot complication around February 14th if they are dating several people at the same time.
Ever thought about that one?
It seems mandatory that vaultloads of money are to be spent.
Worse, your hierarchy of "favorites" could be exposed to the cold scrutiny of everyone involved.
We're on record around here as being full supporters of dating more than one person at once. Life is too short to let serial exclusivity run its course one person at a time.
The goal is to deserve what one wants, which involves practice, leading to a solid level of experience in evaluating what one wants in a potential long-term relationship.
But the fact remains that since it all goes down on ONE specific day in the calendar year, one's priorities will show through (since we're in the Valentine's spirit) like a red thong under a white skirt.
So how can this issue be dealt with effectively?
Well, you could tell everyone involved that you're going to "just say no" to Valentine's Day this year. Hey, it has been done before.
But I'll tell you straight-up that the women you're dating will ALL feel de-prioritized by that pronouncement. Somehow, that you would bypass V-day altogether is just hard to believe for most women.
What you CAN do, however, is set expectations (especially with people you haven't been dating for very long) that there's no pressure to spend lots of money.
Hey, if you've got extra ca$h to drop and can pull off doing so without coming off as a needy approval-seeker, go for it.
But for the rest of us, this simple matter of clear communication makes much more sense. Most women will be relieved by this notion--especially if they're dating others also. If they throw a fit, you're dating the wrong women anyway, right?
The most important thing to any high quality woman is that you're spending time with her--especially if you're not in an exclusive relationship.
Just buy cards, and leave it at that. Better yet, be creative. I know one guy who even bought one of those packs of valentines the elementary school kids use and handed them out. Classic.
And if you suspect that isn't enough?
Well, the good news this year is that February 14th falls on a Tuesday.
That means you can take women out Friday, Saturday, AND Tuesday if you'd like, and all of them we'll feel good about the scheduling.
Somehow, Sunday and Monday feel like they would generate some questions...but you could probably get away with taking women out those nights also.
And I didn't even mention Saturday and Sunday afternoon.
But what about the other problem?
You know, the "dateless" one.
Well, have I got a solution for you. (What, did you think I was going to leave you hanging? Not a chance.)
The first order of business is to get outside of your own head, stop being self-conscious about it and realize that at least 99.9% of the rest of the human population is up in arms over Valentine's Day also.
Guys, women everywhere are absolutely bristling with nervous energy over whether they'll have a date on Valentine's Day or not.
There is probably no other time of year that women are more approachable than right now, at about a week to ten days out from V-day.
Nowhere is this MORE evident than ONLINE.
When I was at the peak of my online dating action, I was floored bynhow women would become MUCH more direct around Valentine's Day.
I'd get more messages from women than usual.
Women I knew who had dropped off the map would suddenly write or call out of nowhere.
And women I wrote to would not only respond even more often than usual, they wanted to cut to the chase more quickly also.
It wasn't at all uncommon for women to want to bypass e-mail and lengthy phone conversations completely.
They just wanted to maximize their chances at meeting a guy and hopefully avoid sitting home alone on Valentine's Day.
And mind you, these women were often the particularly attractive ones. The self-imposed pressure, ironically enough, seems to be even higher the more desirable they are.
I'll tell you what. If that isn't a massively valuable enough secret for you, here's another : If you think the week BEFORE V-day is a bonanza, you haven't seen anything yet.
The week AFTER Valentine's Day is arguably the most primo opportunity you are going to get all year long to meet the most stunning women out there.
Why?
Well, if they didn't get a date for Valentine's Day, the weight is immense. They feel left out...like they missed out.
Even better, there's no longer any social pressure to spend money or go through the trappings of the holiday.
Seriously, guys. The next two weeks of your life are absolutely mission critical if you have "online dating" written anywhere on your radar screen.
It's time for YOU to step up and be that very guy women might miss out on if they don't meet you between now and the 14th.
I couldn't be more serious about what I'm saying. This is no joke.
By now you know that my program Online Dating Domination 2.0 is not for guys who want to wade around in the kiddie pool. Over 90% of all guys FAIL at online dating--even with more unbelievable women online nowadays than ever before.
Why do they fail?
Simple. We as men don't ever seem to ask for directions.
Meanwhile, there are very specific steps you can take to rise above the average frustrated guy online.
So few guys ever actually get around to asking direction that when those few guys DO learn the ropes, they end up meeting and going out with their top choices among women on whatever dating site they are on.
We're not talking about a "numbers game". This is called total online dating domination.
Guy seriously...the time to meet an amazing number of women is RIGHT NOW.
That's all for now.
Do you have any question? Leave your comment below and I will reply.
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How To Turn Valentine's Day Into A Clear Advantage
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