I've noticed something really weird about the e-mails we get.

Whenever a guy writes us, he's almost always wondering how to get a woman (or six) into his life.

But when women write us, they're almost always asking what to do about a guy they're already dating.

Pretty wild, huh?

For whatever reason that phenomenon exists, it is what it is.

I have to say, though, that one recurring thought often crosses my mind when women write us.

"Man...this would be a lot easier to solve if the guy himself was talking to us instead of the woman he's dating."

By now you know that Emily and I are equal opportunity dating coaches. We believe both men and women can get things right, and both can mess things up.

And there are representatives of both genders who have good intentions with MOTOS (members of the other sex), and others whose intentions are not so good.

So yes, at I'll tell a woman exactly why she's screwing up her relationship. And I'm not shy about it.

But don't kid yourself. Other times I'll tell her to drop everything and run away from the guy she's seeing.

So my question to you today is a poignant but important one: What would I tell a woman you're dating to do about YOU if she called me and asked?

Here are five guys I universally tell women to say "next" to:


1) "DISAPPEARING GUY"

If only I had a dollar for every woman who has ever written us wanting to know what to do about a guy who's dropped off the face of the Earth.

Yeah, well...you and I already know he's no longer interested.

But the point is he should have been man enough to give her the straight truth about there being a better match out there for her than him.

But most of us as guys would rather avoid the potential emotional drama of being forthright with a woman than to man-up and do the respectable thing.

Seriously...if a woman likes you, then she really believes "you had fun" and that "you'll call her" when you say you will. If you utter phrases like that and don't do what you say you're going to, you lack character. Period, end of story.

And if you lack character, then I'm not going to be shy about telling women to forget about you.


2) "LYING GUY"

There was a hilarious commercial from a mobile provider where a man and a woman are at a speed dating event. The man tells her that "all he wants is to settle down and have kids", but the woman counters by reading his bio-statement that says the opposite.

From there, everything he says turns out to be in direct contrast to what he's said elsewhere.

I don't personally believe that all men are liars like some "lady guru" dating coaches tend to assert. But there are some of us who perpetuate that belief, much to the chagrin of the guys out there who have integrity.

This really is a case of the bad apples spoiling the whole bushel.

Horrible.

The bottom line is that if you've been telling women whatever you think they want to hear just to get in their pants, I'm going to recommend to the women you've been seeing that they keep their panties on...just like I'd tell you to watch your wallet if a woman was whispering empty "sweet nothings" to you.


3) "NEUTER GUY"

Look, if you're NOT coming off as a masculine man, you're not attracting women. Sexual polarity is what keeps you from hearing the dreaded "just be friends" talk.

Women deserve to feel sexual attraction every bit as much as you do.

So when women write us expressing crushing guilt because they're dating a "great guy" who they "just don't feel it for", we explain to them exactly why they feel the way they do and help lift the guilt of kicking him to the curb off their shoulders.

Never hide your masculine presence because you think it'll turn women off. The opposite is true, as long as you're not pushy or predatory about it.


4) "LITTLE BOY GUY"

Not only should you be a man who shows responsibility as a provider, protector and a leader, women have every right to never settle for a guy who demonstrates anything less.

When women tell us how frustrated they are by a guy's double-talk, bad decisions, lack of a plan, inability to make her feel safe and/or overall flakiness we affirm her frustration and do what we can to assure her there's another guy out there who really "gets it".

That's the guy she should be with instead...a mature man, not a child.


5) "SUBTLE RED FLAG GUY"

The more I think about this one, the more I'm tempted to just call him "Manipulative Guy".

When you think about it, a person (man or woman) who shows you just a glimpse of what he or she is like in hopes you'll believe something else is going on that head of theirs is really just trying to warm you up to accept whatever they send your way later.

We've heard from women who see a "really, really nice guy" verbally abuse a waitress or a relative early on but dismiss it in the moment. Sure enough, once there's more water under the bridge between them he starts verbally abusing her also.

A more innocuous example would be the lighter found in the guy's silverware drawer that's allegedly used to "start the grill", when a month or so down the road his closet smoking habit turns out to be for real.

A more extreme example would be the guy with a vicious jealous streak who seems "normal" up front, but knocks up his girlfriend and marries her very quickly so as to lock her down from even so much as leaving the house later.


Now that I've given you some hints that might help you arrive at a well-informed answer regarding whether I'd recommend you to a woman or not, let me make one thing perfectly clear. The point of this exercise is to give you some 20/20 foresight. I'm all about helping you WIN with women from the very start.

So if some of what I'm about to say hits home, that's a GOOD thing.

This message is going out to around 57,000 guys so please don't take it personally. Use it to correct your course and thrill women's brains out instead of making them write to Emily.

And yes, it'd be up to you whether you stayed with her or not. That's no coincidence.

What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!