How Do I Know If He's Interested In Me?

[Alexa]

I was wondering what you would say...do you think this guy is interested? How should I talk to him?

I have seen him before at the library when I get a computer. The local library has different branches and I have seen him at two of them.

I remember in the fall of last year when I asked for a computer he made a statement that "I think I have seen you at..." and he named the branch.

Anyway, about a month ago I went to get a computer (a day I normally don't go to at this branch) and he happened to be the one working. I was shocked. most likely, as it had been last year when I saw him last.

I guess I liked him then but didn't talk to him. I figured he would talk to me if he was interested.

Well, that night I went to my car (I parked on the street) and happened to glance up to see who was nearby about to cross the street as I was looking for my keys.

I didn't notice him at first and when I did I looked back and smiled and he said, "Hey" and I said, "Hey" and went back to looking for my keys.

Would that mean anything? I never can think of something to say at the moment until afterwards.
I saw him at the other branch about a week later when I got a computer.

Then, I think it was a couple of weeks when I saw him yet again when I was at the library but didn't ask for a computer.
Well, last week (about 2 weeks or so since I saw him last) I asked for a computer and he said "Gwen, right?"
He knew my name. He remembered my name.

If he remembered my name, does that mean anything? It was about 4 weeks ago when I gave him my name for a computer and he remembered.
Are these occurrences good signs, or am I imagining?
How should I talk to him? Is there something to say when I check out or get a computer? How would I know if he is interested?
I haven't been able to pick up on anything yet.

Thank you

[Clinton]

Well from what you describe it's VERY clear that he likes you.

He is showing all the signs.

He has engaged you in conversation several times now and he even remembered your name.

But here's something you're probably not expecting me to say...

He most likely thinks you are not interested in him at all.

It doesn't sound like the conversations you've had with him inside the library have gone very far at all, even though it appears he's attempted to make small talk.

And when he greeted you outside where your car was and your response was to simply say, "Hey" then you turn your attention to looking for your keys you might as well have said, "I don't want to talk to you"...regardless of whether that was true OR not.

That is a huge blow to a guy, and he's unlikely to press you any further for conversation.

Interestingly, most (if not all) men report that it requires them to muster ALL of their courage to approach a woman they've never met before and talk to her.

Do you know that?

It's true!

They are typically VERY AFRAID of be laughed at and told "no"...perhaps in a publicly humiliating manner.

Even though the VAST majority of women are perfectly polite people and would NEVER be rude to a man who was perfectly respectful toward you, men are very much afraid of living that nightmare.

Knowing that, if a guy actually DOES try to start a conversation and continues to talk to you it's safe to assume that he likes you.

Also given that his job gives him the opportunity to interact with dozens of people every day, if he makes a point to remember your name then that's VERY significant.

Next time, talk and flirt with him by smiling and laughing at anything funny he might say so that he can get at least a subtle indication that you are enjoying the interaction with him.

You will be amazed at how even a simple measure of approval like this will afford him a MASSIVE dose of confidence to ask for your number or even to ask you out on the spot.

Be sure to relax and enjoy the conversation as you would with anyone else, even though your mind is probably racing with excitement.

After all, you don't freeze up when you talk to women or your girl friends, right?

You can do this!

You can absolutely help carry the conversation, too.

For example, you might ask how long he's been working for the library. Or you could ask a question like, "What's your favourite book here?"

Those would be the simple, basic ways to press the "easy button" without much chance of fumbling your words.

But if you're feeling more spunky and creative you could also reach for something funny to say yourself.

For example, when he recalled having seen you at the other branch you might have responded with, "Yes...do you have a twin brother working at the other branch also? I think I remember seeing someone who looks like you there."

Whatever you say, smile when you say it. Never forget to smile.

Be sure to talk about the latest interesting YouTube video you've seen or the most curious thing you've read recently instead of politics, religion or anything else that's controversial.

Avoid "dark" or negative ideas, keeping the conversation fun, light and even playful.

Since he likes you he WILL try to continue the conversation, but you really do have to show some interest in him too.

The good news is that you don't have to throw yourself at him...it can all be subtle, just like I've described.

Coming off as friendly AND female does not at all have to imply that you're either too "forward" or too "available".

Consider that "non-reaction" is one of the most frequent reasons why perfectly sweet and adorable women find themselves not being asked on second dates.

Ironically, it's because the poor guy usually thought she didn't like him!

It's unfortunate that some women feel like you need to be come total "non-reactors" around men, lest they get the "wrong idea" about you.

The "wrong idea" that men typically get in that case is that you DON'T have any interest in them whatsoever...after all, us men are human to just like you.

Relax and have fun with this guy Gwen. You never know...he may well turn out to be the "one" for you.

[Michael]

Men are known for their sexual desires toward women. If this is so, how can you then tell if he's just playing you (to get some free sex) or if he's zeroing in for romance? Here are 7 telltale signs that he's into you big time...Pay very close attention to the following points...

He's 100-percent attentive.
A guy whose eyes appear glazed while you talk isn't that into you yet. But the one who listens with full intent while you say your piece is one who's really romantically interested in you. This guy would also look you straight in the eyes as you speak and he can respond to all of your questions without any hesitation.

He spends for your romantic dates.
Of course this isn't all about the money that he burns. As he takes you out on actual dates, he would also tell his intentions and you would feel his sincerity as he does this. He would also respect you as a lady should be treated.

He takes a mental note of your likes and dislikes...
And he would never be caught dead doing the things that you detest. He'll know what color you would prefer and which food you are allergic to.

He doesn't only talk about his family and friends, he actually lets you meet them.
If he's in it for a long period of time, then you'd notice that he'd discuss things that only his closest social circles would know. He'll also want you to meet his folks. This is your man hinting that he's dead serious with you and that you're not just one of his past times.

He's willing to wait.
Try testing this man - if he's willing to wait and respects your decision to not have sex with him yet, then he's truly interested in you as a romantic partner. The jerks and the players would immediately disappear once you deprive them of this one free thing that you could give them.

His affections are real.
Observe how he would lovingly hold your hands or longingly look into your eyes. A man who can't get enough of you is someone who's into you real deep.

He would willingly adjust his schedules for you.
So who cares if he has a prior appointment? If you badly need his help, then you would always come first! This man would come running the moment you say that you're sad or in trouble.

[David]

It can be risky to think that he likes you if he hasn't said as much. There are a number of questions you should ask yourself to determine whether he likes you.

If he flirts with me, does he like me?

This can depend on the kind of flirting he does. A man generally is flirtatious with girls now and then. This is know as a playful type of flirting. There is another kind of flirting that confirms that he likes you. If he is flirtatious with you all the time, over a period of time, then this indicates that he really likes you.

If he makes an effort with his appearance when he's with me, does he like me?

If you're just a friend, the guy you like won't be too worried about his appearance when he's around you - he might have neglected to shave and is wearing an old t-shirt. However, if he has made an effort with his appearance, this is a good sign that he really likes you. His will be clean shaven and will be wearing aftershave, and he may have on a brand new shirt. This all indicates that he likes you.

If he gives me gifts, does he like me?

Guys generally aren't big on giving presents, unless they are actually wanting to tell you something. A regular guy friend may give you a gift for your birthday or at Christmas. However, if the man you like gives you gifts for no obvious reason or occasion, then this indicates that he likes you.

If he's always there for me, does he like me?

Men take good care of their buddies. They will be there for their male and female friends in times of great need. If the guy you like comforted you when you were upset or stood up for you when you had an argument with a friends, this isn't really enough to prove that he likes you more than as a friend. He may have just been being a good friend to you. But if he is there for you all of the time, no matter what the circumstance, then this a signal that he really likes you.

If he always shows he cares, does he like me?

Men show a lot of protection over the people that they love. Even if you are only in the early stages, he will demonstrate that he cares for you. He will phone you to make sure that you made it home safely. He will offer to escort you to where you have to go, to make sure you are safe. If he often shows real concern for you and care for you, then this is confirmation that he really likes you.

If he calls me on the phone often, does he like me?

Guys like to hang our with their buddies rather than hang around at home. Most guys are busy and often out being social. So if he call you a lot on the phone, despite his busy schedule, then this shows that he likes you.

If you have answered in the affirmative to most of these questions, then you can be pretty confident that you guy you like likes you back.

[Alexa]

Hi everyone, thank you for your answer and helpful advice.