Trying to understand a guy......

[Sakura]

Need some advice. I'm totally crazy about a guy. We have been talking for almost 2 months but we haven't went out yet. We joke around and flirt but I don't know if he wants something more. He's a great guy and I'm really care about him, but we are friends and I don't want to screw that up. I'm don't have alot of experience with guys and I've never really dated before. But I feel such a amazing spark when I'm near him and I think about him all the time. I've heard rumored that he has talked about me to other people and of course I talk about him whenever I can. I have a few friends that are suggesting that I'm patient and wait for him to make the first move and see what happens. But it's been over a month. Is it ever going to happen? Does he even like me?

[Lily]

Will he ask me out? Well the answer to that will depend on whether you are:

• Coming off as self assured and confident.
Guys love it when girls are self sufficient and happy about themselves. They like girls who make their own rules and are not afraid to speak their minds. This will tell him that you are independent and would not be clingy and smothering. Or if you are sending him positive subtle signals that you are interested in him as well and he reciprocates.

Be sure that you do not give too much out. You have to keep him interested to make sure he will ask you out again. He will also ask you out if you take an interest in things that he likes as well as stuff and activities that he likes to do.

• If you still ask yourself will he ask me out?
Well why not approach him and ask him if he would like to grab a cup of coffee or hang out after class some time to look out at CDs. That does not come off as too aggressive but it does send him a message that you are interested to get to know him better. Make sure though that there is a possibility that this guy likes you in return and would say yes.

• Also, do not take too long to wait for him to actually ask you out.
It will be very difficult getting his attention again once you lose it and the answer to your question, will he ask me out will sadly become: not anymore.

• Another thing to keep in mind is that in order for a guy to ask you out you have to keep him curious about you.
Do not give him too much information about yourself. So much so that he would no longer be intrigued and pursue getting to know you any longer. Guys are naturally programmed to hunt. They like the excitement of courting a girl and for them it is an adventure to try to ask you out. Make him feel that there is more to know about you than what you are letting on and he will ask you out again.

Beware of making it too difficult though and this may result to him backing off completely. Just keep on sending him those positive signals of your interest and flirt with him subtly. Do this and ask yourself in front of the mirror: will he ask me out? You would be sure to answer your reflection with a confident yes.

Remember whether or not he will ask you out will depend entirely on what you are sending out his way. So make sure that you have made up your mind that you are really interested in this guy and would really like to go out on a date with him.

[Anthony]

· Always try to be together. It all starts from the very basic purpose of having out together. Spending more time together creates a bigger chance that you end up as his girlfriend. You get to know each other better, laugh more, engage in stimulating conversations --- you get the picture.

· Don't be too over eager. Just be cool, you'll get there in time. It's much better to wait for some time rather than to hurry things up and spoil it because you're being clumsy. So, get a hold of yourself, make sure that you're doing things right. It is you who's going to reap what you sow in the end. And guys do love some girls who play a little hard-to-get.

· Get personal. Every time you're together, try to ask or have a conversation about his personal life, interest and ambitions. This will strengthen your relationship with him --- you will create and share an intimate bond sooner or later. Getting personal is a prelude in getting intimate with your guy. He'll be longing for you company all the time.

· Be closer to each other. Ask him out if you're both free --- hanging out most of the time builds up a strong relationship. Be closer, both literally and not. hen you're sitting together, try to lessen the distance and close the gap until your legs are both touching. It's subtle but it's a start. When talking, lean over and whisper something in his hair. The idea is to create intimacy as much as you can.

· Tell him you like him. Be open with him. Don't be shy in telling him that you actually like him. Being shy most of the time won't get you anywhere. So just tell it to him like it's a natural thing in the world. You don't have to make it sound so serious too. Out of the blue, express yourself. He'll like that.

[toni345]

I have been there! First, he was really nice to me, we joke around and text me like.. every day, he even give me a flower when valentine comes. First, i didn't have feeling to him, but and then I did like him but now he seemed like.. just want to get to know me. And now we just meet and text like we're just friend, not more. I know from the first time i was so ignorant to him, maybe that's why (
so i guess you should let him get to know you.

[Sakura]

Thanks for the advice. We both know that we like each other and are taking things slow.