You are not my type

[Picollo42]

I'm a 42 y/o guy, no kids, never married and also didnt have many gf's in the past either, maybe one or two

I always thought since younger that something was wrong with me, as i was never popular with girls, in fact, i was bullied by them, and while my friends rotated girlfriends i was the one without a girlfriend in the group.

I don't consider myself repulsive, but everytime i approach women in real life or online dating i always get rejected as i was when i was younger. One thing i notice is that women can be mean or just plain rude to me in their way of showing they are not interested. I feel like a leper or a creep sometimes, at least that's how they make me feel.

I think the you are not my type i hear so many times, is just a way of women saying to me that they find me creepy/repulsive, or maybe i just look unremarkable? How can i know if this is the case? Would someone male or female here in the forum be so kind to tell me what is wrong with me looks wise? It's in moments like these that you think how helpful would be to have a social circle and honest friends that would tell me the truth.

Needless to say my love life doesn't exist, my life is really empty as i have no friends (the ones i had were male and they now are married or have kids of their own and are really busy to go out with me and i was never able to have female friends , maybe related to my looks) and i just go to the gym and try to stay busy to forget the loneliness but it gets harder and harder to cope.

I'm not shy and i dont have a bad personality. I'm going through a depression and i am taking medication and seeing a shrink, but nothing helps because my problem is called being lonely and feeling rejected and it's getting worse by the day. There's no doctor or medication that fixes that.

If no one replies that's fine at least i feel a bit better just by posting here.

[PRW]

One thing i notice is that women can be mean or just plain rude to me in their way of showing they are not interested. I feel like a leper or a creep sometimes, at least that's how they make me feel.

They picked up signs of weakness in you and hit you with tests to see if you would hold up. They do this instinctively, without always knowing they are doing it. It is built into their survival instinct.

I feel like a leper or a creep sometimes, at least that's how they make me feel.

You didn't hold up and failed their test

They want a guy who will be their "rock", their "anchor". They want a guy who is centered, emotionally strong, confident, masculine, and a leader,...that they can emotionally bond with and feel emotionally "safe" with. They test you to see if you are those things. If you fail those tests you do not appear attractive to them and they will never want you as a romantic partner. However they may say things like, "You're so sweet!",..."You're such a nice guy",...and "I only just want to be friends".

One book that completely changed my life concerning this stuff is called "How to be a 3% Man" written by Corey Wayne. Hunt it down.

[PRW]

Out of curiosity. I looked at your profile and we both work in the same field.

You have a friendly and attractive face if the thumbnail pic is really you. Learn to make that an asset. The book I recommended to you will be a great help. Take what I said seriously.

[Zinok]

What type of girls do you usually approach?
Maybe you're picking them for shallow superficial reasons, and therefore are only having shallow superficial interactions with them. I find it hard to believe that if you're online dating, and messaging girls genuinely, perhaps about things they mention in their profile that you have in common, that you're going to strike out with each and every one of them. Unless you're only messaging the bar star hotties who aren't interested in genuine interaction and just want people to party and pay for their bills.
My advice to you is to message girls who are your age, who have profile write ups that reflect shared interests, and send them messages reflecting that you took some time to message them specifically and not just copy pasting the same message to a ton of girls. You're not unattractive, so unless you really do come across as super creepy, you should be able to find someone as long as you're picking down to earth girls who like the same things as you do. Also, don't lead with the fact that you're so inexperienced, or lonely, or experiencing depression. Don't lead with comments about their beauty or bodies. Just lead with shared interests and try to strike up a genuine conversation. The rest can come later.

[Picollo42]

PRW and Zinok thanks a lot for your time helping me out