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A few weeks ago I went to a local gentlemen's club which is something I hardly ever do, but it was my birthday and since I am single and not dating anyone, I didn't see anything wrong with. The dancers they had on staff that day weren't much to my liking, but that's not the point of the story. I mentioned to the barmaid that it felt too hot in there so she went to tell the manager and then came back to let me know they had turned on the A/C. We started talking casually and she told me that she was 25, had recently purchased a house and worked as an interior designer. She was working this job part-time to make some extra money to pay for her dog's surgery. She seemed rather mature for her age and was quite attractive and well-endowed. I am 46 years old (21 years older than her) so I was just looking at it as a nice conversation with a pretty young woman and nothing more.
There were two other men in the club who expressed interest in her and one of them wanted her phone number, but she didn't care for him so she played the old "don't call us, we'll call you" game and took down his number, but didn't give him hers. After he gave her his phone number, she immediately came over to me to show me and then threw it in the trash. We chatted a little bit more and she was getting mildly touchy-feely, often touching me on the wrist or upper arm and at one point she asked me if I worked out (I do). I had mentioned to her that it was my birthday early on so, shortly after the other guy had given her his number, she slipped a folded up napkin in front of me and said "Happy Birthday". As I expected, it was her phone number. I immediately texted her when she walked to the other side of the bar so that she would have my number too, then a little while later I told her I was leaving. She then literally ran out from behind the bar and gave me a really big hug.
Over the next few days she initiated the texting and would say things like "I wish you were here to talk to me right now" and "I want another hug from you". Since I am not a millenial, I do not like the whole texting obsession much at all and am not very good at it, but I went along with it to accomodate her. I was getting increasingly frustrated because all I would get from her were a bunch of one-liners even if some of them were complimentary. I suggested that we get together for a mini wine tasting since we both enjoy that and she appeared very interested, but when I was trying to cement a date she wasn't really giving me a straight answer, however, how much can you really get when the other person never writes more than one line at a time?
We had made tentative plans to meet up on a Wednesday evening, but a few hours before the date she texted me "I have to work tonight". She meant work at the club and I know that sometimes they call her at almost the last minute so there is a good chance she was telling me the truth, but there were other signs that bothered me so I replied that it was no problem and we could do it another day. I then figured I would take a step back and give her some space before reaching out again. A few days went by and I heard nothing (this was after she had been so assertive early on) so I continued to keep quiet and I never heard from her again. This was three weeks ago so I deleted her number and the texting history and moved on, but the whole situation just did not sit well with me. I never asked her for her phone number and was not going to, basically because of the difference in our ages, and she even said to me "Am I too young for you?" right after she passed me her number. The attention from this successful and attractive young woman was flattering for a middle-aged single man who is admittedly struggling with a mid-life crisis, but I don't know if she was just playing me all along even though it certainly didn't seem like it early on.
I apologize for the length of this post, but I wanted to share as many details as possible. This type of thing has happened to me before, but not in this specific environment and not with anyone so much younger.
There were two other men in the club who expressed interest in her and one of them wanted her phone number, but she didn't care for him so she played the old "don't call us, we'll call you" game and took down his number, but didn't give him hers. After he gave her his phone number, she immediately came over to me to show me and then threw it in the trash. We chatted a little bit more and she was getting mildly touchy-feely, often touching me on the wrist or upper arm and at one point she asked me if I worked out (I do). I had mentioned to her that it was my birthday early on so, shortly after the other guy had given her his number, she slipped a folded up napkin in front of me and said "Happy Birthday". As I expected, it was her phone number. I immediately texted her when she walked to the other side of the bar so that she would have my number too, then a little while later I told her I was leaving. She then literally ran out from behind the bar and gave me a really big hug.
Over the next few days she initiated the texting and would say things like "I wish you were here to talk to me right now" and "I want another hug from you". Since I am not a millenial, I do not like the whole texting obsession much at all and am not very good at it, but I went along with it to accomodate her. I was getting increasingly frustrated because all I would get from her were a bunch of one-liners even if some of them were complimentary. I suggested that we get together for a mini wine tasting since we both enjoy that and she appeared very interested, but when I was trying to cement a date she wasn't really giving me a straight answer, however, how much can you really get when the other person never writes more than one line at a time?
We had made tentative plans to meet up on a Wednesday evening, but a few hours before the date she texted me "I have to work tonight". She meant work at the club and I know that sometimes they call her at almost the last minute so there is a good chance she was telling me the truth, but there were other signs that bothered me so I replied that it was no problem and we could do it another day. I then figured I would take a step back and give her some space before reaching out again. A few days went by and I heard nothing (this was after she had been so assertive early on) so I continued to keep quiet and I never heard from her again. This was three weeks ago so I deleted her number and the texting history and moved on, but the whole situation just did not sit well with me. I never asked her for her phone number and was not going to, basically because of the difference in our ages, and she even said to me "Am I too young for you?" right after she passed me her number. The attention from this successful and attractive young woman was flattering for a middle-aged single man who is admittedly struggling with a mid-life crisis, but I don't know if she was just playing me all along even though it certainly didn't seem like it early on.
I apologize for the length of this post, but I wanted to share as many details as possible. This type of thing has happened to me before, but not in this specific environment and not with anyone so much younger.
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