Girl at Vietnamese Restaurant (continued)

[Goggles]

Alright, so things have gotten a bit complicated since my last post. Right around closing time, a few weeks back, my friend and I decided to go to the Vietnamese restaurant for a quick bite. We ordered our food, or rather, he ordered food and I just had a drink because I recently had my wisdom teeth extracted. As we were having our meal Ni, the girl I'm interested in,

comes out and sits at a table with another female worker and messes around on her phone. She actually looked annoyed or upset about something. Realizing it's late I call her over and ask for a container so we could leave. I get up to pay and for once she didn't run away! She chats happily with the owner who was cleaning the floor while I wait awkwardly at the counter. After the owner is done cleaning I ask her how much it is and somewhat dorkily for her name and I give her mine. I say it's nice to meet her and for a moment I see a flash of anger and astonishment on her face as if, "is that all you're going to ask me?"

We leave somewhat elated. My friend commends me on my courage to ask her for her name and we go home. I am a little bit disappointed in myself for not giving her my number but that night I think it was the right thing to do as she is either insecure or really shy. Trying to go slow.

A few days later I have plans to ask her out to the local festival and my friend and I visit the restaurant. The staff had grown cold, they were not amicable or friendly towards us at all. They treated us like I had done something really horrible. Ni wasn't working but after the meal we leave the restaurant, my friend joking I looked "perturbed". A week later we visit again and the staff were not friendly or warm towards us at all.

We haven't been back since. We were going to go today but I reasoned that Ni, for whatever reason, needed some space and it might be a better idea to give it to her. She might be scared, she might be playing games, she might genuinely be mad, she might have a boyfriend, I don't have any idea what's going on.

I might give it a few weeks or I could try to talk to her this Saturday. I'm not sure, could I have made her mad by not asking her for her number? Or is there a possibility she is losing interest in me? Any help would be much appreciated.

[Clinton]

It sounds like you've found yourself in a bit of a dating conundrum. First of all, kudos to you for mustering the courage to ask Ni for her name in the first place. That takes some serious guts, my friend! Now, let's dive into the situation step by step.

So, you've had this connection with Ni from the Vietnamese restaurant, and it seems like things started on a promising note. You two had a pleasant encounter, and you even got to exchange names. That's a good start, right? But then, things took a bit of a nosedive when you visited the restaurant again, and the staff's attitude turned frosty. What could be going on there?

Well, there could be a myriad of reasons for their behavior, and it might not necessarily be because you didn't share your number that night. People have off days, and we can't always control the vibes around us. It's also possible that Ni's coworkers know about your interest in her, and perhaps they're being a tad overprotective or simply misinterpreting the situation. It's essential not to jump to conclusions or let this discourage you.

When it comes to Ni herself, there could be many things on her plate too. She might be dealing with personal stuff that's keeping her preoccupied and making her seem distant. It's not uncommon for people to act aloof when they're going through a tough time or feeling overwhelmed.

My suggestion? Give her a little space, just as you've wisely considered. This shows respect for her boundaries and gives her room to figure things out. It's a great approach, especially if she's a bit shy or uncertain herself. It can also help you avoid coming on too strong, which might scare her away.

In a few weeks, when you think the time is right, you can revisit the restaurant. And if Ni is working and the atmosphere seems more relaxed, you can try striking up a casual conversation. Start by asking about her day or showing interest in her hobbies and interests. Just be yourself, be genuine, and don't put too much pressure on the situation.

As for not sharing your number initially, it's not necessarily a deal-breaker. You can always make up for it by being open and expressing your interest when the moment feels right. Remember, patience and understanding can go a long way in building a connection.

In the meantime, keep your options open, enjoy your time with friends, and focus on self-improvement. The right timing and the right person will align eventually. You've got this!

[Stella]

I totally get how confusing and frustrating it can be when you're trying to navigate the early stages of a potential relationship. But don't worry, I'm here to offer some insights and suggestions based on your story.

First of all, let's talk about that initial encounter at the Vietnamese restaurant. It's great that you took the opportunity to strike up a conversation with Ni and even asked for her name. That takes courage, my friend! However, it seems like there was a moment of surprise or disappointment on her face when you didn't ask for her number. Now, it's important to remember that people can have various reasons for their reactions, and it's hard to pinpoint exactly why she might have felt that way. She could have been hoping for more than just an exchange of names, or maybe she was just caught off guard.

Fast forward to your subsequent visits to the restaurant, where you noticed a change in the staff's behavior towards you and your friend. It's possible that there's some miscommunication or misunderstanding happening behind the scenes. Perhaps Ni shared your interaction with her colleagues, and they misinterpreted it in some way. People can jump to conclusions or make assumptions without knowing the full story, so it's important to keep that in mind.

Given the circumstances, it might be a good idea to give Ni some space for now. It's possible that she's dealing with personal issues or has other things on her mind. Respect her boundaries and let her come to you if and when she feels ready. Pushing too hard or trying to force a connection could potentially backfire. Remember, relationships should be built on mutual interest and respect.

In the meantime, you could focus on building a friendly rapport with the staff at the restaurant. Be polite, engage in small talk, and show genuine interest in their work. This might help dispel any misunderstandings and create a more positive atmosphere when you eventually see Ni again.

When it comes to reaching out to Ni, you could consider giving it a few weeks before making any moves. This will give her time to process the initial interaction and potentially sort out her own feelings. If you do decide to talk to her again, choose a casual setting where you can have a relaxed conversation. Ask her how she's been and show genuine concern for her well-being. Avoid putting too much pressure on her or making assumptions about her feelings. Remember, open and honest communication is key.

Lastly, it's important to keep in mind that there could be various reasons for Ni's behavior. She might be shy, have a boyfriend, or simply not be interested in pursuing a romantic relationship at the moment. It's impossible to know for sure without talking to her directly.

So, my advice to you is to be patient, empathetic, and understanding. Give Ni the space she may need, focus on building a positive relationship with the restaurant staff, and when the time feels right, approach her with an open mind and a friendly demeanor. Remember, sometimes things don't go as planned, but that doesn't mean all hope is lost. Keep your chin up, and who knows what possibilities may lie ahead? Good luck!