The Girl I Liked Said I Can't Keep A Conversation Going

[Jerome]

I was texting the girl I liked and well... she said behind my back to other girls saying I was short sentenced like I can't keep a conversation going and that hurt me. You know... like I like her but it felt like I was just hit with a baseball bat as hard as someone could hit. It hurt. When I'm with my friends I'm usually the listener I'm never really involved with there convos. They usually talk to me when they want something. I still feel a little lost. Also the girl I liked said I was to shy to be around. Seriously though did she have to go there like I get I'm shy but I can't help it. Most girls I'm around I'm shy and like usual I'm just the listener. I guess I just wasn't meant for her. I really liked her though. I still like her. I hate it when the one time I let someone in she took me by the heart and chucked it as far as she could. I'm in 8 grade. Back in 6 grade I dated a girl who was shy to. Everything worked out we dated for awhile but she broke up with me. Then wanted to get back together with me. So we got back together. We did this like 8 or 9 times until it came to the point that she just played with me. She would say it was a dare sorry or I was kidding. I barely talked to girls in 7 grade. Everything went downhill from 6 grade. Very few people know about my past. It feels good to get it out though. So yea... the thing that really hit me though was back in sixth grade the girl who played with my heart told me I was to shy. Getting told that again really hit me. I mean I can't explain how hard that hit me. This whole year I've thought about it. The one time I let a girl in again she toys with me. And then supposively I spammed her phone like wth I never did. Well that was told to her friend again. I just hate it when others but in I'm tired of it like seriously. I only loom forward to 3 things everyday now... 1 family 2 sports and 3 alone time. I have a friend who gets super mad when I don't want to hang out. But yea I haven't texted that girl in like 2 weeks because of all this. She never texted me back so I guess she's happy now. Well it looks like I'm back In the same position from sixth grade. I hope you see this and could help me out thanks for taking the time to read this.

[Judith]

Not knowing how to keep a conversation going after you introduced yourself is very common among guys, especially after you asked her all the usual intro-questions, like "What's your name?", "How are you?", "Where are you from?", etc.

Now do you have the same problem when you are talking to your friends and family?

Look you're not the only one. She probably also doesn't have anything to say, and thinks she is a bad conversationalist as well.

There are a few things you can do.

The most common thing to do is to keep asking questions and just be interested in what she says. The thing is, that is pretty much what all the other guys do, besides you don't want this to feel like an interview for her.

You can tell stories. Storytelling will be the thing that will fuel most of the conversations, but if you don't have any stories or relevant stories, you should stock up on some memorized stories to be able to tell whenever you want. In my book the Art of Social Natural, I do get into a lot of storytelling techniques in how you can use just one memorized story to come up with unique and different stories while still being relevant to the situation to tell every time on the spot.

Now I have this powerful technique I called "obviousation - Saying the Obvious to Neutralize the Awkwardness (S.O.N.A.)."

This technique works like magic.

This brings down a lot of barrier, just like when you are talking to your friends and family you don't have these barriers. You act relax and just say what's on your mind.

Imagine you and a girl are just talking and all of a sudden the conversation becomes quiet and there is this moment of awkward silence.

You're thinking you have nothing to say and that you are a bad conversationalist; however she is thinking the same thing too.

When this happens, SONA (Say-the-Obvious-to-Neutralize-this-Awkwardness), just say in a cool joking way something like,

"Huh, I guess we're not great conversationalists are we? We're both quiet right now? We have nothing to say to each other? You know...I hate when this happens? When 2 people are talking they both become quiet, and usually they think they are the one who thinks they are the bad conversationalist...but they don't realize is that the other person is thinking the same thing, too."

This can even get a laugh from her, the laugh of recognition

And you guys can then go into a conversation about "conversations."

Watch as how she opens up from here, you will come form feeling like being this stranger to being somebody who she knows in her life.

Also you are being the man here who is easing the same tension and awkwardness she feels from not having anything to say, or she will eventually do it for you...by "I gotta find my friend."

Ever notice why comedians are good at what they do and are funny? They are ballsy enough to state the obvious that nobody else is willing to admit, but hey they are comedians and do it in a joking way, that's how they can get away with it.

From here, you can also go into a cold-reading.

After you have the conversation about "conversations", and there is another awkward silence, SONA again.

"So what can we talk about now? I think this time, you're the bad conversationalist."
Play and have fun with the awkward silences.

After when this happens, magically you guys will feel like insider, and will feel more at ease and relaxed and have a better connection.

The way to describe this feeling is notice the difference in your behavior when you first meet a girl and there is this sort of barrier between you 2 that you both can't completely relaxed around other each and will try your best to present your best self.

And after when you have sex, that feeling changes and you 2 feel a lot more at ease because you guys have gone through a lot, had your embarrassing moments, shown your flaws and you 2 are both OK with it without judging each other.

Not a lot of guys are confident enough to do this. What do must guys do, they try to find stuffs to talk about by continuously asking question; however, by willing to admit this, it shows balls and honesty, and will bypass a lot of superficial barrier and get to the real her, and you will be seen as different in her eyes.

[Dennis]

There are some very important steps you must take right away if you want her to be attached to you. Read on to discover what these steps are and keep her attached to you forever......

Show her that she can lose you anytime- Most guys tend to put too much hope n one women due to which they always end up coming across as highly needy and desperate. As long as you show the girl that she is not the only option for you and you have more than enough fish in the pond she would always try to get your attention. You see the trick here is not to make her feel that she is the only one out there for you.

Don't have any expectations- Act as you don't really have her and never keep any expectations of her. Most guys tend to expect a lot from the girl due to which they get into this needy state where when the girl does not do what they expected her to do they always end up falling into this desperate state. You should drop all expectations and act as if you never had her as that's the time when you will really have her.

Don't be too attached to her- When you aren't too attached to her....That would be the time when she will be highly attached to you. Don't put all your focus on one woman and you will always end up having her focus in the long term.