Should I tell Him How I feel

[Neha Singh]

I have been dating a guy last year around February and we broke up 8 months after. The relationship, we had and the times we shared, were really good. During our time together, he was facing a lot of issues outside of our relationship, and i was his biggest support and comfort. I have been there for him through thick and thin, through all his times of needs. He had indeed love me too. However, i was unaware about his philosophy of giving people testing. He had test me and i had fail. His test was weird, since it wasnt based on the fundamental of a relationship like trust. His test was based on my reaction towards situation. He claimed that i cant handle situations and he no longer see the future with me.
He was very stern with his decision and claimed that we can never be back together and all the cruel break up words, a person usually hears.
5 months after the break up, he messaged me out of the blues and told me that he is sorry for the pain he had cause in the past. I ignored that specific message. A few days after, we end up chatting. One day, i hit him up and ask him to hang. He didnt refuse. He even postponed other important schedule to hang with me.. But before he did.. He made mention to me, that he dont wanna go public places because he is talking to someone and he dont wanna create any problem, but things with them are not confirmed. He wanna seek options first and then select. He even, mentioned that he knows how much he made me suffer and he is truly sorry for what he has done, and it was becuz of his stupid test of philosphy. And he is scared he hurts anyone else. We decide to meet in private, where we can talk through our other problems and he said he will give me a massage since it will reduce my stress..
We decide to take a room, at the hotel we used to go. and we spend most of the time talking and he was basically giving me advice and helping me out.. As we were about to leave, he said he is gonna give me the massage. So i took off my clothes and i allow him to.. When he was about to finish my massage, and i turn over and lay on my back. He was on top of me at that time and we were talking. As i am about to get up, he just stuck there and my face stuck at his neck. I then lay down back and then up again and same thing.. He then came closer and kissed me and the crazy romance starts from there.. One thing lead to another and we eventually had sex.. During our sex, we both said its been a very long time, and he even state that last time he had sex was with me. He dropped me home that night.. And both of us, didnt know what else to say..
We didnt message back each other, because i guess, we dont know what to say.
I really felt that connection that night, it was the best. I was thinking to let him know exactly how i feel towards him.. But i dont know if its the right thing to do, knowing the fact that he talking to someone else. And he state two contradicting things: 1. he dont wanna hurt anyone else 2. He did not confirm her yet.

[Zinok]

This boy is playing you.
And testing you? Bullshit. So immature. You don't need that.

[Neha Singh]

Thats what other told me too.. Thank you for the advice btw..

[Sandra]

It seems logical to tell him what you're feeling but in this case, is honesty really the best approach? It's actually not. If you're intent on renewing the romantic connection that you once shared with your ex, you have to be very careful with your approach. Telling him what you feel is better left for another time. For now, you need to focus on proven tactics to get him back in your arms again.

The reason you shouldn't tell your ex boyfriend that you still love him is simple. It's not something he wants to hear right now for various reasons. First, if you were to tell him you would likely be very emotional and that alone would make him uncomfortable. He doesn't want to hear or see you crying. It will make him believe that you're emotionally unstable and unable to handle difficult situations. He'll find you less appealing because of it. He'll also think you're desperate and no man wants to be involved with a desperate woman. Sharing your true feelings with him may actually push him farther away.

A much better, and more effective approach, is to actually tell him that you see the break up as something positive. Explain that you were also considering some time apart and you can see the benefit in it. You must do this with a smile on your face for it to have the full effect. The reason this is so helpful is that it triggers a certain, very strong, reaction in your ex. He'll feel rejected. You may not want to hurt him emotionally like this, but it will actually help you get him back.

From this point you need to muster up the willpower to stop talking to him for a few weeks. This is, by far, the biggest challenge that many women face after a break up. All they want is to talk with their ex and reason with him. They feel that if they have enough time with him that they'll be able to convince him that he's making a huge mistake. He doesn't want to have to explain why he broke up with you over and over. Also, if you're throwing yourself at him like that, he'll never want you back. What you must do is make him miss you. This is how a man discovers just how much a woman really means to him. If you can do this, you'll find that he'll naturally be drawn back to you. That's why avoiding him for a few weeks is so powerful. Make a vow to yourself to stop all contact. You'll be glad you did.

[Neha Singh]

Thank you so much

[Olivia]

When I heard my boyfriend had a new girlfriend, I was devastated because I thought that meant he was completely over me and had moved on to other girls. However, I was taught by the guide that this was not the case at all. In fact, in the guide was clearly stated; if your boyfriend starts dating another girl very soon after his breakup with you, that relationship is guaranteed to be a rebound relationship - it means that your boyfriend is actually not over you - so not over you, in fact, that they need a new girl in order to suppress the "you" in them.

So what you need to know is that when your ex boyfriend is dating someone new, it doesn't mean that they are over you - it means the opposite. So now you know that your ex is not over you, it is time to take advantage of it!

You have two options in front of you - and in neither of those options you are to tell your ex boyfriend that you still love him. The first option is that you do nothing. Your boyfriend knows that you know of his new relationship - so he'll be fully expecting you to call him and either beg him to take you back, or swear and curse at him. When you don't do those, he will feel like he might have really (really) lost you. This will make him panic, because he is not over you.

The second option that you can take when your ex boyfriend is dating someone new is a bit more active (it is actually the route that I personally took) and it involves you calling your ex to congratulate him sincerely and without any sense of irony and bitterness on his new relationship. If you have been harassing him with texts about how much you still loved him etc. this is also a good time to apologize for that. Just make him think that you are over him and you wish him happiness in his new relationship. Don't be bitter, and if you can pull this off, he will be in an extreme state of panic and will want you back immediately.

[Neha Singh]

Thank you Olivia