abuse disguised as jokes?

[Chloe12]

my husband likes to make some very questionable jokes towards me and I wonder if they are abusive or put downs in nature? When we first got together he used to joke that he couldn't let me feel to good about myself for too long or that he's gotta bring me up to bring me back down and when I would be like what? He will say it's a joke. He jokingly calls me names, jokes about punching me, he makes very sexist jokes that women talk to much and calls me a woman. He also criticizes me or gets irratable if I don't do things in a way he would. I walk on eggshells around him and when he gets even the slightest upset I fear him I get very afraid. He's also very sarcastic and spiteful towards me. I just feel like I'm insane at this point are these normal jokes and behaviours??

[Bill]

These are absolutely not normal jokes and behavior. All you need to do is to have a one-on-one talk with him, and let him know that the things he does displease you.

I'm sure he'll change when you tell him this.

[Ella]

I know exactly what you are going through at the moment. I will suggest you report this issue to someone he respects, like his mom, dad, brother etc. That person will be in the best position to talk to him regarding his attitude.

All the best.

[PRW]

You are describing the "push-pull" that Narcissist are famous for.

[LanaReid]

Emotional and verbal abuse is sometimes more harmful (and long lasting) than physical abuse. It tears down your self-image and self esteem if you let it. Love is not supposed to hurt like that... you should feel uplifted, supported, encouraged to grow and be your best by your partner in a relationship.

[MrHenryVargas]

Hi. This is a topic that needs more main stream attention. We've been desensitized to the true effects of our words on people's lives. His behavior is not one of someone who truly loves. If we observe his words and conduct we can see they are very self-centered and manipulative. These 2 evidences of sure signs that he does not love you and in fact has a lot of personal issues he needs to deal with also. However, it is NOT your responsibility to help him through that.

He's the deal and this may hurt a little bit. What keeps us in a relationships that we should not be in, is often our ego's steel grip to a fleeting emotion or emotional experience. Here's some helpful hard truth. Recognize that even if you have the emotion of being in love, he lacks the character of True Love, and so you should exit that relationship so you can focus on your path to fulfillment of your purpose and you're compliment will come as you are focused on your journey.

- Mr Henry Vargas