I’m trying to make it work

[Cindy22]

So after so many fights and try’s my boyfriend said even though he loves me so much decided to put an end. We had been together for 2 years. He kept complaining about my attitude and also I’m a flight attendant he’d complain about me being gone. He said I was always angry at him but I had reasons. Last time together I found out stuff that I wasn’t aware of so I was mad because we’re a couple that lives together why would I have to find out stuff from other people.
So Monday night we talked and he said he loves me so much but things weren’t working and he also didn’t know if they can work. I honestly don’t know what else to do I have tried a lot of course I’m gonna get mad if I find stuff I don’t know.
I told him that I’d move out and he said I could stay there as much as I can till I find a place. I cried so much because I did see a future with him and he also told me he didn’t see one anymore, that hurts me the more. I asked to sleep next to him. I laid next to him crying telling him how I feel how he was breaking my heart. That maybe there was something else we could do to fix things if we really love each other. He kept telling he didn’t know if there was anything else to do
i coudlnt sleep that night, even though he was next to me. I could feel so much pain in my heart
next day I called him telling him that so many times he begged me to stay I wasn’t gonna walk away I wasn’t gonna let him go, that I love him and I was willing to do anything for him. (I know I’m being stupid) he told he was very confused. I left for a trip, I texted him with words that came right out of my heart, telling him how much I love him and that we should try one more time that I still see a future with him, but he never replied me back
it hurts so much, how can two people that love each other has to be suffering

[Cne]

Are you sure that he found your message? Because if he did and he still decided not to reply you, I think he is done with you. I do not know if I am old fashioned but According to what I know he should be begging for you and your love and presence not the other way around. To me it sounds like he is confused of what he wants , if it is not that he is just trying to shake you off

[Jane]

Many times, in a relationship, what happens is that a bunch of minor things may go wrong and if they are not dealt with they pile up, fester over time, and then become one huge sore that seems incurable. Word of caution... never underestimate the damaging effects that little, seemingly insignificant acts, or words, can have on a relationship.

Be encouraged, though, with the reality that most relationship trouble need not be seen as a write off, but simply as a fender bender. Any relationship is susceptible to the daily pressures of life: family obligations, job and career demands, etc. These often lead, however innocently, to the neglect of the one person who is most important in your life... your partner. Truth is, without him or her, all the hard work, planning, and dreams for the future would be worth nothing. Take heart! A fractured relationship will usually mend with a little focused, and well-meaning attention.

This may seem basic and elementary, but trust me, it's usually the simple things that, left undone, come back to bite us! You must spend quality time with your spouse. Not just time, quality time... there is a huge difference. It's easy to think you do spend time with them, but do a little honest mental exercise here. Consider how much time you spend with friends, your children, doing work and household chores and then how much time you spend with your partner. It may surprise you how little time you actually do spend with them. This reality often leaves one or both of you feeling seriously neglected and unloved.

You are only one person with only 24 hours in your day. If too much of your time is given to friends, work, or extra curricular activities, you are going to have to learn how to say no, plain and simple. Another solution is to include your spouse. Be together in those activities and work together on projects whenever possible. Having common interests and goals is a great way to help a relationship bond.

Another tip when dealing with the question of how to fix a broken relationship is to make a habit of connecting with your partner daily, by doing something personal and meaningful. It doesn't have to be elaborate or complicated. The joys of life really are made up of simple pleasures... a hand-holding stroll in the park, and no you don't have to be 85 years old in order to enjoy a "stroll!" Listen to music together over a sip of wine or steaming cappuccino. Take in a concert or go to a movie, but do a little extra, like dressing up and making it a date. Work out together, go for bike rides, go swimming... many things you do will not only benefit you emotionally but also health wise. Like I said, keep it simple, you will be pleasantly surprised just how good it will make you feel and the positive impact it will have on your relationship.

Inevitably, when considering how to fix a broken relationship, the topic of communication will come up. Talking and communicating with one another is a must. Be open and transparent (but not in an obnoxious or mean way), sharing your feelings regularly. Don't be vague and leave your partner to do the guess-work, be creative and descriptive when telling them how you're feeling. Be honest about sharing the good and the bad, but be sure to do it in a non confrontational way and in a tone of voice that is calm and non threatening.

One major tip here when communicating with your spouse... be sure to give them your undivided attention. There is nothing worse than someone glancing at the TV or trying to read a magazine while you are talking. It right away sends the message that what you have to say is not important. Be sure that your response is not critical. Hold hands and make eye contact. This re-assures your partner that you care and are genuinely interested. Body language is your friend, use it. Smile and be supportive even if you may not completely agree with everything they are saying. Being emotionally involved and proactive is a huge piece in the puzzling question of how to fix a broken relationship.

Bring the romance back! Never underestimate the power in a hug or simple touch. Do this often, even if it is just a brief or passing touch. Whisper "I love you" in their ear or leave a sticky-note on the mirror with "I love you" on it; learn to say "I love you" in a foreign language. Just one simple gesture can change the whole atmosphere, turn an attitude around, and positively influence their day. Here's a motto that I just love: "Do random acts of senseless kindness"... and the more the better! Like the old song says, "Give me your hand when I cross the street, say I look nice when I'm not." Believe me, these little things go a long way and mean more than you will ever know to the one whose heart is lonely and hurting.

Finally, if your relationship seems routine and boring, add more spontaneity... like a trip just out of the blue. It doesn't have to be a two-week Mediterranean cruise! It could just be a quick outing for ice cream or a meal at a romantic restaurant in a nearby town, or perhaps a night at a bed and breakfast. How to fix a broken relationship can be as simple as coming out of your own little world and getting more involved in theirs.

[Clay]

Even if your relationship is heavenly or maybe it's hit rock bottom, if you put in effort, time and compromise from time to time, you can take your relationship back to the heights.

Find your way forward to make your relationship work. That means stop looking back to the past and concentrate on your future together. Don't ask questions about past loves and don't sneak around trying to find things out. You will worry unnecessarily and if found out something strange, and if found out, you will not be trusted.

Another way to make your relationship work in the long run is to have interests and activities that you both enjoy to keep your relationship long lasting. The honeymoon period doesn't last forever. Find your common interests and activities that belong to the two of you, like a movie no one else seems to like.

Share your passions. It's important to have common interests other than just your love for each other. At first, being passionate may in the beginning be all that is needed to nurture your love, but after your relationship progresses, it's important to share your interests or activities so that your relationship continues to grow stronger. Do different things so you don't fall into a rut. For instance, go barefoot bowling, share a jug of beer and a steak sandwich on a Sunday afternoon.

Avoid getting bored with each other by having your own interests as well. Do you love reading horror novels while he has a game of pool with some pals? Guaranteed you will think about each other while apart, after all, absence does make the heart grow fonder, and it is important to keep your own persona while you build or rebuild your relationship. Realize that from time to time, both of you will need some time alone, to think about other things or to think about how lucky you are to have each other.

The art of compromise is a very important part of making your relationship work. If your perfect Friday night consists of takeout Chinese and a DVD and he always insists on fish and chips, make sure that you at least get to pick the DVD. Don't forget that both of you will need to compromise from time to time and it's okay to talk about it if you are always giving in.

Take things at your own pace. Don't push for commitments that you're both not ready for, regardless of what your friends may be doing. Remember this is how to make your relationship work. Pace yourselves and let things flow naturally. All else will follow in the natural course of things.

Perhaps the most important thing in how to make your relationship work is communication. Problems should be talked through, but in a way that allows you both to make comments. Make sure the setting is right. Don't tackle a problem in a bad place or while in a bad mood. Make the time to sit down together without distraction and go through it reasonably and sensibly. Even if you're furious, try to be rational and approach the situation in a calm manner. If you don't want to have big monumental talks, then tackle small things that annoy you at the time that they arise. You don't have to make a song and dance about it. That way, tension doesn't build in the relationship, allowing you to move forward knowing each other better.

Even if your relationship is as solid as the ground you walk on, don't take your partner for granted. Remember that you are lucky to have found "the one", but that you have to make it work and thrive.

Most importantly, and probably the best tip for how to make your relationship work is to compliment each other every single day, and be genuine. Also be inventive and try to find something fresh and new each day to say that expresses your love.