Tweet
Hi all,
Not really looking for advise as such but a mean to pour my heart out.
I’ve been single or 8 years before I started a relationship recently, some 6 months ago. Heard a lot about the dangers of having a relationship with a hostess at clubs, in BKK (Bangkok) to be precise. I travel to BKK from KL for quite a fair bit in the last 3 years working for my company. Naturally, my boss, myself and clients do visit clubs from time to time. Never been interested in any of the girls, never thought of taking them back for a night of lust seeing how the girls for what they are. I don’t really judge them but when you sat around with them long enough you know they are only ever after one thing if you thought to bring them back to the hotel.
One fine evening on an urgent call to BKK for a meeting, my associates ended up at a new club. There I was mesmerized by this girl. I have no lustful thought for her, just that she was a wonderfully beautiful girl whom I was having a pretty good time talking to. We exchanged contact details before we left the club and we got texting and talking everyday via Whatsapp, nothing dirty, just the usual chat. I got to know her a little better over time and started to like her a lot. We never talked about money.
We met out of the club on my next trip to BKK for golf, dinner with my friends. It was on this trip that she revealed to me she has a kid, nearly 2 years old. It took me a little to process that and I found it in my heart that I’m okay with that. Note that I’m single, never been married and childless myself. I like her enough to try to give it ago. She was surprised with that and was really glad that I didn’t do a runner. She told me her ex left her while she was pregnant for someone else and it led her to depression which she is taking loads of medicines for. We didn’t officially start anything until a month later and we didn’t jump right into bed from the get go. We took it easy and let the relationship develop.
I asked her why she ended up where she is now with a kid to raise. She said her son has been going in and out of the hospital and she needed the money. She told me truthfully, that she never follow her clients home, only on certain occasions she will asked to attend a dinner function with clients. She would go home early after and we will video call each other.
I invited her over to visit me to and attend one of my associate’s wedding, she was moved by the thought that I will her to attend such an intimate event where she will get to meet my most of my friends. We got intimate on this trip and it was full of emotion for me as I’ve been single for 8 years. We had a really lovely break and she has to head back to BKK after 5 days.
So on and on with me travelling to BKK to meet her at every opportunity, until the festive season came along and I asked her to come visit my family. We agreed to keep her kid a secret for the time being. Again a happy trip.
Months would passed and her birthday was coming up. We had planned for a trip to Hoi An but it was not to be as my pay has been coming in late for the past few months. She wasn’t disappointed saying as long as we are together we will be happy anywhere. It was her birthday when I woke up real early to prepare breakfast for her. Because of her medication, she wakes up late. Her phone rang, I thought it was the alarm and wanted to turn it off for her. Turns out it was several messages coming in. Two of them from a same sender, a man, asking her to a beach holiday the following Saturday. I never made mention about the fact that I saw the messages and I trusted her to ignore the invitation.
I was back in KL getting busy with work when she texted me on Friday evening to tell me her phone has got an issue. She can’t seems to be able to make calls or video calls and she is sad she couldn’t have a video call with her son whom is staying with her sister out of BKK. I won’t be able to call her as well as she wouldn’t be able to pick up the call, only text messages will work. This issue with her phone is genuine as I have witness it myself but will work again after restarting a couple of times. Couldn’t make it work this time after trying many many times she said. Said she will go to the phone shop to have it repair the next day. Minutes later she said she forgot she has got an event the next day and won’t be able to get the phone fixed and she has to go work at the club immediately from the event. A little suspicion crept over me to the coincidence of the purported trip the man offered which happened to be the very next day. I dismissed my suspicion and trusted her know that if I can still text her throughout the day all will be well.
The Saturday came, we exchange our usual loving messages in the morning and she said she has to rush to her event soon. She didn’t text me again until lunch where she said she is super busy. No messages again until evening around 7pm by which time she said she will be at the club. She texted me she arrived at the club and will be busy changing her outfit and putting up fresh make up. I asked her how her day was, if she was tired, I never got a reply. Still I didn’t suspect a thing. I just texted to her that she should take a little rest if she can and text me when she gets home from work. It was at 4am when she texted me to tell me she is home. I texted back immediately but sees that my messages is not getting through which I found odd. I tried calling directly to the phone but the phone was turned off. I was tired myself and let it be.
The very next morning, she texted me earlier than usual. I always text her at 9am to remind her to take her medicines. Told me she has to go to the loo and she has taken her medicine and will sleep again. I asked why was her phone off before and will she get her phone fixed later and she said the battery was out and it was the alarm that woke her and she is too tired to go to the phone shop that day. But by now my mind was telling me all in not quite right. Still I let it be. She didn’t text me again until after lunch and it was a short message. I texted back and got no further reply from her until late evening. She doesn’t work on Sundays and we had a brief exchange of messages before she told me she is sleepy and tired.
Next morning we were back to our same routine. I got into work and saw her Line (a phone app) posting of an image of her alone in a restaurant. It wasn’t a selfie, someone took that shot. I have an Instagram account which I deactivated long ago. My sub conscience is telling me to take a do a little snooping there since she uses Instagram a lot and she knew that I don’t have the app on my phone. I reinstalled my Instagram app and it took me dozens of attempt find her. She used a different nickname, it was her son’s account which I found first to locate her account. It was the same image I saw posted on her Line account some minutes ago but the beauty of Instagram is, it allows you to tag the location together with the time. It was where the man suggested to take her to.
I texted her on Whatsapp asking her where the restaurant she posted on her Line account is at since it looked like a really nice place and if we can go together on my next trip to BKK. She said it was an old photo, yes she does occasionally post them, and she couldn’t remember where the place was. I didn’t tell her I went snooping at her Inst acc. I only replied back to her “I see” and sent a smiley. The other dead give away from the photo was the cap she was wearing, one which was given to her by one of her client 2 months after we met. We were together for 6 months at this point. Still I kept what I found to my own. She asked suddenly if there’s anything wrong, I just said no not really and told her I was driving and will text her later. I wanted to give her the opportunity to confess. No confession came and I wrote her a long message, it wasn’t a confrontational one, just telling her that if there’s another man in her life I’ll truly be happy with her and thank her for the time we had together. She replied almost immediately asking me where the idea of another man came about? Still I didn’t tell her about what I found on her Inst acc. Instead I told her I saw her massages on her birthday and I think she went on a holiday with a man and that’s why her phone didn’t work for the duration. She furiously denied that she was ever with another man and I was the only one for her. She blamed me for further stressing her out with her depression with all these false allegations and will put an end to our relationship right away. I love her and happy enough to let her accuse me of being insecure, let her think I was the cause of the breakup.
I was crushed and missed her a great deal and I just couldn’t get over the fact that I had given her a love so true, promise to take her child as my own only for her to create a web of lies to go on the trip with another man, one which she still think I hadn’t found out about. Looking back I had several other suspicions before. There was this time when I couldn’t reached her one evening a month ago before her birthday. I texted her numerous time to get up for dinner since she has been sleeping all day. I got no response. I called via Whatsapp, it went unanswered. I tried calling directly, it wasn’t pick up either. 3 hours later she called, telling me her phone has the same issue and she was having her phone repaired when I texted her. Said her had to changed her screen since it’s sensitivity is not optimal anymore. I was thinking that’s odd, if the phone is in the midst of being repaired, my direct call to her wouldn’t have rang since the phone should be off for repair. She went home and later posted a weird cryptic message on her Line acc. The message read as such “We will talk, well understand each other but who will talk about superheroes. Please don’t talk to the end, I’m confused as well”. This is at the time when the cinemas are showing “Avengers – Infinity War”, I have not seen the movie myself but my sister told me it could be rather confusing towards the end. My suspicion was that she went watching a movie that evening. She even had a light make up which is odd since if she is just going to the phone shop, she is one not to wear make up.
I was sending out a festive greeting to all my friends and associate, a week after we broke and I accidentally added her in the blast. She texted back to me asking me what I sent to her? I told her I was sorry, it was meant for my friends who are observing the faith. Told her I was truly sorry. She said nevermind and I took the opportunity to remind her to take her medicine. She thanked me for the reminder. At lunch she texted me asking how I was and hoping that I’m happy without her. I told her I’m not ok as I’m missing very badly. She told me the same. We gave ourselves another chance and she happily sent me some pictures of herself she took that day. We did a video call in the evening. I didn’t bring up the fact that I knew she cheated on me. I was hoping it was a one off thing she had with the other man and we can resume what we started.
A week later, her phone has the same issue again so she claimed. I let my frustration out, telling her why I always can’t call or video call her. Told her we needed that to keep our relationship going. She is still sending love emoticons to me and telling me she loves everyday. There are more cryptic posting on her Line acc recently. I can make out what they are. I knew then her lies came back. I’m broken once again.
I have not gone around to telling her that we should just go our separate way yet. I’ll once I posted this on the forum. I guess I’ll be telling her that I wasn’t the cause of her further depression and I knew exactly where she was the Saturday she said she was supposedly working an event job.
I’m sorry this is so awfully long. I couldn’t find a place to pour out but here. I’m shattered now. Perhaps the saddest part about any relationship is that love is never equal, one will always love the other more. Also, when you tell the someone you love her and she knows it's true, and when she tells you she loves you, she knows it's not true.
Not really looking for advise as such but a mean to pour my heart out.
I’ve been single or 8 years before I started a relationship recently, some 6 months ago. Heard a lot about the dangers of having a relationship with a hostess at clubs, in BKK (Bangkok) to be precise. I travel to BKK from KL for quite a fair bit in the last 3 years working for my company. Naturally, my boss, myself and clients do visit clubs from time to time. Never been interested in any of the girls, never thought of taking them back for a night of lust seeing how the girls for what they are. I don’t really judge them but when you sat around with them long enough you know they are only ever after one thing if you thought to bring them back to the hotel.
One fine evening on an urgent call to BKK for a meeting, my associates ended up at a new club. There I was mesmerized by this girl. I have no lustful thought for her, just that she was a wonderfully beautiful girl whom I was having a pretty good time talking to. We exchanged contact details before we left the club and we got texting and talking everyday via Whatsapp, nothing dirty, just the usual chat. I got to know her a little better over time and started to like her a lot. We never talked about money.
We met out of the club on my next trip to BKK for golf, dinner with my friends. It was on this trip that she revealed to me she has a kid, nearly 2 years old. It took me a little to process that and I found it in my heart that I’m okay with that. Note that I’m single, never been married and childless myself. I like her enough to try to give it ago. She was surprised with that and was really glad that I didn’t do a runner. She told me her ex left her while she was pregnant for someone else and it led her to depression which she is taking loads of medicines for. We didn’t officially start anything until a month later and we didn’t jump right into bed from the get go. We took it easy and let the relationship develop.
I asked her why she ended up where she is now with a kid to raise. She said her son has been going in and out of the hospital and she needed the money. She told me truthfully, that she never follow her clients home, only on certain occasions she will asked to attend a dinner function with clients. She would go home early after and we will video call each other.
I invited her over to visit me to and attend one of my associate’s wedding, she was moved by the thought that I will her to attend such an intimate event where she will get to meet my most of my friends. We got intimate on this trip and it was full of emotion for me as I’ve been single for 8 years. We had a really lovely break and she has to head back to BKK after 5 days.
So on and on with me travelling to BKK to meet her at every opportunity, until the festive season came along and I asked her to come visit my family. We agreed to keep her kid a secret for the time being. Again a happy trip.
Months would passed and her birthday was coming up. We had planned for a trip to Hoi An but it was not to be as my pay has been coming in late for the past few months. She wasn’t disappointed saying as long as we are together we will be happy anywhere. It was her birthday when I woke up real early to prepare breakfast for her. Because of her medication, she wakes up late. Her phone rang, I thought it was the alarm and wanted to turn it off for her. Turns out it was several messages coming in. Two of them from a same sender, a man, asking her to a beach holiday the following Saturday. I never made mention about the fact that I saw the messages and I trusted her to ignore the invitation.
I was back in KL getting busy with work when she texted me on Friday evening to tell me her phone has got an issue. She can’t seems to be able to make calls or video calls and she is sad she couldn’t have a video call with her son whom is staying with her sister out of BKK. I won’t be able to call her as well as she wouldn’t be able to pick up the call, only text messages will work. This issue with her phone is genuine as I have witness it myself but will work again after restarting a couple of times. Couldn’t make it work this time after trying many many times she said. Said she will go to the phone shop to have it repair the next day. Minutes later she said she forgot she has got an event the next day and won’t be able to get the phone fixed and she has to go work at the club immediately from the event. A little suspicion crept over me to the coincidence of the purported trip the man offered which happened to be the very next day. I dismissed my suspicion and trusted her know that if I can still text her throughout the day all will be well.
The Saturday came, we exchange our usual loving messages in the morning and she said she has to rush to her event soon. She didn’t text me again until lunch where she said she is super busy. No messages again until evening around 7pm by which time she said she will be at the club. She texted me she arrived at the club and will be busy changing her outfit and putting up fresh make up. I asked her how her day was, if she was tired, I never got a reply. Still I didn’t suspect a thing. I just texted to her that she should take a little rest if she can and text me when she gets home from work. It was at 4am when she texted me to tell me she is home. I texted back immediately but sees that my messages is not getting through which I found odd. I tried calling directly to the phone but the phone was turned off. I was tired myself and let it be.
The very next morning, she texted me earlier than usual. I always text her at 9am to remind her to take her medicines. Told me she has to go to the loo and she has taken her medicine and will sleep again. I asked why was her phone off before and will she get her phone fixed later and she said the battery was out and it was the alarm that woke her and she is too tired to go to the phone shop that day. But by now my mind was telling me all in not quite right. Still I let it be. She didn’t text me again until after lunch and it was a short message. I texted back and got no further reply from her until late evening. She doesn’t work on Sundays and we had a brief exchange of messages before she told me she is sleepy and tired.
Next morning we were back to our same routine. I got into work and saw her Line (a phone app) posting of an image of her alone in a restaurant. It wasn’t a selfie, someone took that shot. I have an Instagram account which I deactivated long ago. My sub conscience is telling me to take a do a little snooping there since she uses Instagram a lot and she knew that I don’t have the app on my phone. I reinstalled my Instagram app and it took me dozens of attempt find her. She used a different nickname, it was her son’s account which I found first to locate her account. It was the same image I saw posted on her Line account some minutes ago but the beauty of Instagram is, it allows you to tag the location together with the time. It was where the man suggested to take her to.
I texted her on Whatsapp asking her where the restaurant she posted on her Line account is at since it looked like a really nice place and if we can go together on my next trip to BKK. She said it was an old photo, yes she does occasionally post them, and she couldn’t remember where the place was. I didn’t tell her I went snooping at her Inst acc. I only replied back to her “I see” and sent a smiley. The other dead give away from the photo was the cap she was wearing, one which was given to her by one of her client 2 months after we met. We were together for 6 months at this point. Still I kept what I found to my own. She asked suddenly if there’s anything wrong, I just said no not really and told her I was driving and will text her later. I wanted to give her the opportunity to confess. No confession came and I wrote her a long message, it wasn’t a confrontational one, just telling her that if there’s another man in her life I’ll truly be happy with her and thank her for the time we had together. She replied almost immediately asking me where the idea of another man came about? Still I didn’t tell her about what I found on her Inst acc. Instead I told her I saw her massages on her birthday and I think she went on a holiday with a man and that’s why her phone didn’t work for the duration. She furiously denied that she was ever with another man and I was the only one for her. She blamed me for further stressing her out with her depression with all these false allegations and will put an end to our relationship right away. I love her and happy enough to let her accuse me of being insecure, let her think I was the cause of the breakup.
I was crushed and missed her a great deal and I just couldn’t get over the fact that I had given her a love so true, promise to take her child as my own only for her to create a web of lies to go on the trip with another man, one which she still think I hadn’t found out about. Looking back I had several other suspicions before. There was this time when I couldn’t reached her one evening a month ago before her birthday. I texted her numerous time to get up for dinner since she has been sleeping all day. I got no response. I called via Whatsapp, it went unanswered. I tried calling directly, it wasn’t pick up either. 3 hours later she called, telling me her phone has the same issue and she was having her phone repaired when I texted her. Said her had to changed her screen since it’s sensitivity is not optimal anymore. I was thinking that’s odd, if the phone is in the midst of being repaired, my direct call to her wouldn’t have rang since the phone should be off for repair. She went home and later posted a weird cryptic message on her Line acc. The message read as such “We will talk, well understand each other but who will talk about superheroes. Please don’t talk to the end, I’m confused as well”. This is at the time when the cinemas are showing “Avengers – Infinity War”, I have not seen the movie myself but my sister told me it could be rather confusing towards the end. My suspicion was that she went watching a movie that evening. She even had a light make up which is odd since if she is just going to the phone shop, she is one not to wear make up.
I was sending out a festive greeting to all my friends and associate, a week after we broke and I accidentally added her in the blast. She texted back to me asking me what I sent to her? I told her I was sorry, it was meant for my friends who are observing the faith. Told her I was truly sorry. She said nevermind and I took the opportunity to remind her to take her medicine. She thanked me for the reminder. At lunch she texted me asking how I was and hoping that I’m happy without her. I told her I’m not ok as I’m missing very badly. She told me the same. We gave ourselves another chance and she happily sent me some pictures of herself she took that day. We did a video call in the evening. I didn’t bring up the fact that I knew she cheated on me. I was hoping it was a one off thing she had with the other man and we can resume what we started.
A week later, her phone has the same issue again so she claimed. I let my frustration out, telling her why I always can’t call or video call her. Told her we needed that to keep our relationship going. She is still sending love emoticons to me and telling me she loves everyday. There are more cryptic posting on her Line acc recently. I can make out what they are. I knew then her lies came back. I’m broken once again.
I have not gone around to telling her that we should just go our separate way yet. I’ll once I posted this on the forum. I guess I’ll be telling her that I wasn’t the cause of her further depression and I knew exactly where she was the Saturday she said she was supposedly working an event job.
I’m sorry this is so awfully long. I couldn’t find a place to pour out but here. I’m shattered now. Perhaps the saddest part about any relationship is that love is never equal, one will always love the other more. Also, when you tell the someone you love her and she knows it's true, and when she tells you she loves you, she knows it's not true.
Comment