Just looking for thoughts!

[Sally1210]

So I started dating R in November he was from out of town but was working in my area, so we spent lots of time in hotel rooms. I would come visit on his off times and we would do dating things. To say i fell hard and fast is an understatment. He sucked me right in. Knew what i was needing and made sure i had it! We went to West Virgina two weeks into our relationship for his uncles funeral. Our dating was sporadic due to him living away, but he would see me when he could and would call and FaceTime me when he was back home. We progressed through the holidays into February. He said he was struggling with some mental illness due to his ptsd from being in the army. He told me I might not here from him again. I was devastated but told him I’d be there and let him go. Within a week he was back stating he had started counseling and was trying to be a better man for me. We progress through the spring and took a really nice weekend getaway at the end of May. June rolls around and he has been struggling with some health concerns and falls of the grid to re-emerge a week or so later. He has since sold his house and is now looking for places in my area to flip so he can be close to me while we figure out our next step. Middle of June we travel back to his area to pick up a few things that he left behind in storage. Have another great time. He is staying a few towns away with friends while he is looking for a place. We would get together when we can and we’re planning a few other trips for the summer. This Sunday I received a text from his phone from his girlfriend T. She claims they have been dating since September, so two months before he and I got together.

She said he just moved in with her this past month and that her daughters call him dad. I am beyond sevestated, . Right after he texted me he said that it wasnt what it seemed and he could explain. I shot him down and continued to text with her to watch the last 8 months of my life unravel. He texted me one more time stating that he was a monster and I should hate him. T swooped in and took over, calling me to confirm I dated him and having him tell me that he loved her and didn’t know what was wrong with him. I later find out that when we briefly split in February it was because T had caught him with 15-20 women. She reached out to everyone but somehow missed me. When she caught him with me this time there were multiple other women in his phone. Now T took over and I deleted both of them from my phone. She’s going to keep him. My hurt besides the obvious is why didn’t I get my closure. She just took it upon herself to claim him and that was the end of the story. I know I’m better off but I’m feeling like I’m lacking on top of the heart ache. Also feeling very stupid that i picked up on none of the signs and red flags. Like he chose her over me. I also didn’t get to cut ties with him face to face, just in a brief text. I feel like they got to keep their little life and I’m left crying on the sidelines. Help with what I don’t even know!

[Sandra]

There is no need to be in competition with this lady T. If she wants him all to herself, then leave him for her. Moreover, there are lots of guys out there that will love and cherish. So, fighting for the love of a man who is in love with another woman is foolishness.

[Roy]

Sorry for what than man put you through, I know how it can be to love someone only to be stabbed by that person. That being said, I think you should move on with grace with your life. He's a player and that's not the kind of man you want to be with. One thing you should be happy for is the fact that the relationship didn't last long. You would have been more devastated if the relationship had lasted for 3 years or even 5 years.

Now is the time to get yourself occupied with things you love doing, this will help you to stop feeling down trodden. In no distant time, the right man will come for you.

Good luck!