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  • I have no one to ask :(

    RomanceDictionary.com
    So, I'm not sure what I'm dealing with, but assumptions are the biggest factor here.

    I'm 36, she's 34. We started dating in March.

    Things started going downhill in April when she started to see patterns, patterns of which, is me liking IG posts, of a friend who is a girl.

    My girlfriend at the time told me not to like anything anymore, which before her, I have been doing for years.

    So I stopped liking this womans post, and infact, I stopped conversing with this person.

    which by the way, this woman is who I work with, we are not even friends to a point we talk everyday, more like once or twice, every 2 weeks, and it's work related.

    But however, I am still following this person, which again, my girlfriend at the time is convinced I like this woman.

    i do not like this woman, she is not my type, she is very much the opposite of me, and I have fell hard for my girlfriend.

    as time moved on, she is convinced that me and this woman are exchanging messages late at night, which are untrue.

    my girlfriend is convinced that me and this woman delete our messages so she doesn't find out, which is very untrue, and I even shown screenshots, and everything!

    this woman has a boyfriend, and my girlfriend was threatening THEIR relationship by saying untrue things like, me and his girlfriend are having a thing, which is a lie!

    i had since then, warned this woman, and her boyfriend of my girlfriends action.

    My girlfriend is angry that I said anything.

    my girl has stressed when I like a post, it means opportunities for that person to DM.

    i dont do that, I'm with my girlfriend, and I liked this womans post for years, and the pictures are of her on vacation with her Dad, boyfriend, mother, dogs, etc.

    am I in the wrong here??



    and also, back in March, me and my girl had encountered somebody who was trying to sell her Onlyfans content to me.

    i declined.

    i later in life, found out you can reverse image search.

    i searched this woman, and it was indeed, a catfish/scammer.

    I couldn't say anything to my girlfriend, because every argument, because my girlfriend always breaks up with me.

    so I stayed quiet, and angry, and walked off.

    i left my phone behind, my girlfriend looked at my phone, and saw I've searched this girl, she lost her mind.

    She asked, I answered, but she's very focused i'm lying, and I wanted to look at her.

    bear in mind, I'm conflicting myself to tell her, and risk a threat of being single because I searched a woman who was a catfish, or tell her, and she'll be mad regardless.

    my girlfriend also has joked about seeing other men, and she joked about sleeping with a co worker, and messed up by remembering a sexual position that wasn't with me, I felt incredibly awkward, and she was certain it was with me.

    I'm sure there's more to say, but for now, I'm at a loss, did I do the right thing to end it?

    what type of behaviour is this?

    is it narcissist?

    i'm stuck.

  • #2
    Navigating relationships can be challenging, especially when assumptions and misunderstandings arise. It's important to approach such situations with open communication and empathy. Based on the details you provided, it seems like there were several misunderstandings and miscommunications between you and your girlfriend. It's crucial to address these issues and assess the overall behavior and dynamics in your relationship.

    From what you've described, it appears that your girlfriend was troubled by your interactions with a female coworker. She expressed discomfort with you liking this coworker's Instagram posts, and as a result, you stopped interacting with her on social media and limited your conversations to work-related matters. However, despite these changes, your girlfriend continued to believe that there was more happening between you and your coworker, even accusing you of exchanging late-night messages and deleting them.

    It's important to note that trust is a vital component of any healthy relationship. If you have been honest and open with your girlfriend, shown her screenshots of your conversations, and assured her that there is nothing inappropriate happening, her continued mistrust and accusations might indicate deeper issues within the relationship. Communication and understanding are key here, as you need to express your feelings and concerns while also making an effort to comprehend her perspective.

    Regarding the incident with the catfish scammer, it's understandable that you were hesitant to disclose it to your girlfriend, considering the previous arguments and potential breakup threats. However, honesty and transparency are essential in a relationship, even if it means facing temporary discomfort. It's crucial to have an open and honest conversation about the situation, explain your intentions, and express how her reaction made you feel.

    It's difficult to determine from this limited information whether your girlfriend's behavior aligns with narcissistic traits. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a complex and diagnosable mental health condition that requires professional evaluation. It involves a pattern of grandiosity, a lack of empathy, and an excessive need for admiration. While some of the behaviors you described, such as mistrust, accusing you of infidelity, and making jokes about seeing other men, can be potential red flags, it's essential to avoid diagnosing someone without proper expertise.

    However, it's crucial to assess the overall dynamic of your relationship. Healthy relationships are built on trust, open communication, mutual respect, and understanding. If there is a consistent pattern of mistrust, manipulation, emotional abuse, or controlling behavior, it may be necessary to seek guidance from a therapist or relationship counselor. They can provide professional insights and guidance on how to navigate these challenges and make informed decisions about the future of your relationship.

    Ultimately, only you can determine whether ending the relationship was the right decision. Reflect on your feelings, the recurring issues, and your overall happiness within the relationship. Consider seeking support from friends, family, or professionals who can provide an objective perspective.

    Comment


    • #3
      From your detailed account, it seems like there are several issues and misunderstandings between you and your girlfriend that have caused significant strain in your relationship. While I can provide some insights based on the information you've provided, it's important to remember that I am an AI language model and cannot offer personal advice. However, I can offer you some observations and suggestions for reflection.

      Firstly, it's clear that your girlfriend has developed insecurities and trust issues, particularly in relation to your interactions with a female coworker. It's not uncommon for individuals to feel threatened by their partner's interactions on social media, especially if they perceive them as potentially crossing boundaries. However, it's crucial to communicate openly and honestly with each other to address these concerns and find a resolution.

      In your case, you stopped liking posts and limited your conversations with the coworker to work-related matters, which indicates that you made an effort to address your girlfriend's concerns. However, it seems that your girlfriend continues to be suspicious, assuming that you're secretly communicating with this coworker and deleting messages. This persistent distrust can be detrimental to the health of your relationship, as it erodes the foundation of trust and can lead to unnecessary conflict.

      It's important to establish healthy boundaries in relationships. While social media can be a source of tension, it's crucial to communicate and understand each other's expectations and concerns. In your situation, your girlfriend's belief that liking a post could lead to direct messages (DMs) seems to stem from her own insecurities. By engaging in open conversations, you can both explore the root causes of these insecurities and find ways to address them together.

      Regarding the incident involving the catfish/scammer, it's understandable that you were hesitant to share this information with your girlfriend due to fear of another argument or breakup. However, communication is key in any relationship, and concealing important information can lead to further misunderstandings and erode trust. It might be helpful to express your perspective and intentions clearly, emphasizing that you were not engaging in any inappropriate behavior and only sought to protect both of you from potential harm.

      Based on the information provided, it's challenging to diagnose your girlfriend's behavior as narcissistic with certainty. Narcissistic behavior typically involves a pattern of grandiosity, a lack of empathy, and a constant need for admiration. It's important to approach such evaluations with caution, as they require in-depth knowledge of an individual's overall behavior and history.

      The decision to end a relationship is a personal one that should be based on careful consideration of your own well-being and happiness. If the issues and conflicts persist, despite efforts to address them and improve communication, it may be worth considering whether the relationship is fulfilling and healthy for both parties involved.

      Comment


      • #4
        First of all, you need to take your life back. This chick seems very insecure to say the least. I myself don't deal with girls that have emotional tirades about everything I do. Perhaps your doing something or not doing something that has her anxiety at an all time high. If you really digging this girl, yall need to seek counseling. You're a better man than me becoz there's no way that I'm gonna let a woman I'm not married too dictate my behavior. IF this woman is a coworker, and you don't care about her nor do u like her, why do u still insist on texting & commenting on her IG. Your gonna have to decide what's important Bro. But given your gf behavior, you're gonna be in for a long bumpy ride.

        Comment


        • #5
          RomanceDictionary.com
          You sound like you got caught with your hand in the cookie jar. Looking for sympathy. Who's the suckered here? Try again your the one playing the victim! Fooler!!!!!

          Comment

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