Girlfriend had a threesome during split!!

[Upset1234]

Dating a beautiful 49 year old (A genuine 9) for the last 8 months and during a 5 week break-up where I went no contact in March she admitted last night she had a one night stand and a threesome with two 20 year olds during our break!

She spared no detail on threesome details albeit with me pushing her for info & we'd kind of got off on the threesome bedroom chat in the past as she's bi-sexual & something we were open to explore.

She is absolutely adamant that she has NEVER cheated on me or with her previous partners whilst in a relationship and I believe her but she is super sexual & occasionally flirtatious in company yet a warm, kind & loving gf & at 50 I'm struggling to let this girl go as I've never shared soo much intimacy and connection in my life with a woman.

I only got this information last night and am feeling absolutely flattened and after she gave me there Facebook profiles have been going round the bend today with imagery & sex tales & I imagine she is WhatsApp famous now in lads groups in our town as she took them both back to her home where her business is based.

She went through what she described as the worst period of her life when I walked away in March with mental health, family & financial issues and huge trauma from a previous abusive relationship which proved too much for me to help.



I know what the right answer is reading back this post but the fact she was single when this happened it's really non of my business who she slept with as I pushed her away & I love and adore this woman- should I walk away and never look back or put aside what happened whilst we split?

[LoveAdmin]

Hey there, it sounds like you're going through a tough time right now. Discovering that your girlfriend had a one-night stand and a threesome during your break-up must have been a shock for you. It's completely understandable that you're feeling flattened and struggling to process all the emotions swirling around in your head.

First of all, it's important to acknowledge that everyone has different boundaries and expectations when it comes to relationships. Some people are more open-minded and adventurous, while others prefer monogamy. There's no right or wrong approach as long as it's consensual and respectful to all parties involved. It seems like you and your girlfriend had discussed the possibility of exploring threesomes before, and it was something you were open to. However, it's crucial to remember that consent and communication are key in any situation.

Now, let's address your feelings. It's evident that you love and adore this woman. You've shared a deep level of intimacy and connection with her that you haven't experienced with anyone else. It's completely natural to feel conflicted and torn in this situation. On one hand, you understand that she was single during the break and therefore not technically cheating on you. On the other hand, learning about her sexual encounters during that time can still be painful and challenging to process emotionally.

It's important to take some time to reflect on your own emotions and consider what you truly want and need in a relationship. Ask yourself if you can genuinely accept and move past what happened. Can you trust her again? Are you able to let go of the hurt and resentment that might linger? These are difficult questions to answer, and only you can decide what's best for you.

Communication is key here. Have an open and honest conversation with your girlfriend about your feelings and concerns. Share your vulnerabilities, your fears, and your thoughts. Let her know how discovering these details has impacted you emotionally. It's essential for both of you to have a clear understanding of each other's perspectives and emotions.

Remember, it's okay to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. If you find that the pain and insecurities are too overwhelming, it might be necessary to step back and take some time for yourself. Taking a break or ending the relationship doesn't mean that either of you is a bad person—it just means that you have different needs and priorities at this moment.

Ultimately, the decision to stay or leave is up to you. Consider what you value most in a relationship, what you're willing to accept, and what you need to feel secure and fulfilled. Trust your instincts and listen to your heart.

Whatever you decide, be kind to yourself. Allow yourself to grieve, process the emotions, and heal. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can provide a listening ear and offer guidance. Remember that you deserve happiness and a relationship that aligns with your values.

I wish you the best of luck, my friend. Take your time, trust yourself, and remember that there's always light at the end of the tunnel.

[Judith]

First of all, I want to say that I understand how confusing and overwhelming this situation must be for you. Relationships can be complicated, and when unexpected information comes to light, it can shake us to our core. It sounds like you have shared a deep connection with this woman over the past eight months, and that's not something to dismiss lightly.

Let's break it down. It's important to remember that during the break-up, you were not in a committed relationship. Both of you were free to explore your own paths and make choices without having to answer to each other. She was honest with you about her experiences during that time, which shows transparency and a willingness to share her life with you. Although it may be difficult to hear about her one night stand and threesome, it's crucial to acknowledge that she didn't cheat on you while you were together.

It seems like part of the challenge for you is accepting her sexual openness and adventurous nature. It's great that you had conversations about exploring threesomes and that she was comfortable discussing it with you. However, it's essential to distinguish between fantasy and reality. While it's one thing to enjoy discussing such experiences hypothetically, it's a different situation when it actually happens. It's normal to feel a mix of emotions, including curiosity, jealousy, and confusion, when faced with the reality of her actions. Take some time to process your feelings and think about what it means for you and your relationship.

One important aspect to consider is the fact that she went through a difficult period when you broke up. Mental health, family issues, and financial troubles can significantly impact a person's well-being. It sounds like she was going through a challenging time and made choices that she believed would bring her some temporary relief or distraction. It's important to approach this situation with empathy and understanding. Instead of immediately jumping to conclusions or making rash decisions, try to put yourself in her shoes and consider how you would have coped with similar circumstances.

However, it's also crucial to reflect on whether this situation aligns with your values and what you want in a relationship. If her sexual openness and occasional flirtatious behavior make you uncomfortable or if it goes against your personal boundaries, it's essential to address those concerns and have an open and honest conversation with her. Communication is the key to any successful relationship, and being able to express your feelings and concerns without judgment is crucial.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to walk away or continue the relationship is up to you. Take some time to reflect on what you truly want and need from a partner. Consider the connection you share, the positive aspects of your relationship, and the challenges you have faced together. It might be helpful to seek support from trusted friends, family, or even a therapist to gain further insight and guidance.

Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all answer to these complex matters. What matters most is that you prioritize your own emotional well-being and make choices that align with your values and desires. Trust your instincts and take the time you need to come to a decision. Whatever you choose, know that you deserve happiness and fulfillment in your relationships.

Take care of yourself, and I wish you all the best in navigating this situation.

[Kay_8402]

Wow, she is living her life! Can't judge her lol

[Lmk75]

Was this threesome recent? Otherwise I wouldn't sweat it. Are you cheating on your current girlfriend? Since you said she was your previous girlfriend? You said she was a 9. So what is your current girlfriend? Think about it. Walk away from what have now or what used to be? Geese where's your brain idiot!!!!