sex with ex

[cluleess]

Just putting it out here, feel free to comment.

I was married for 10 years, now separated but living in the same house due to financial pressures.

My wife said she wanted a divorce as grown apart, when she then looked into it found she could not live on her own financially at the moment, so i told her that for 2 times a week if she had sex with me she could carry on living at our house, use the downstairs area has her own with the patio door being her entrance and i use upstairs. She agreed and this has been now for six months our arrangement, which we put into writing, but now she is getting very reluctant to have sex, am I wrong to insist on forcing it?4 times now she came upstairs and just said are you ready for your payment if so lets get it over with, went to the bedroom dropped her leggings or lifted her skirt and just said, stick it in i have not got all day!

[Scot]

First off, let me say I really appreciate you reaching out and sharing what's going on. It takes guts to open up about personal matters, and I want you to know that you're not alone in navigating the complexities of relationships.

Now, I want to be straight with you—it sounds like you're stuck in a tough situation. Living with a separated partner due to financial constraints is challenging enough, and adding a unique arrangement like the one you've described can make things even more complicated.

It's clear that both of you are facing financial pressures, and you've come up with what you believed to be a practical solution to coexist in the same space. However, the recent reluctance from your wife to continue with the agreed-upon arrangement is causing you distress, and that's completely understandable.

I want to acknowledge that emotions run high in situations like these, and it's crucial to approach them with sensitivity and understanding. Your wife's hesitation might stem from various factors—emotional, psychological, or simply the strain of the arrangement itself.

While I'm not a relationship expert, I can offer some thoughts that might help you navigate this tricky situation. First and foremost, communication is key. Have an open, honest conversation with your wife about how you're feeling. Share your concerns, but also be receptive to her side of the story. Sometimes, understanding each other's perspectives can pave the way for finding a more agreeable solution.

Consider exploring professional help—counseling or therapy. A neutral third party can provide insights and guidance that might be challenging to see from within the situation. They can also help facilitate a more productive conversation between the two of you.

It's crucial to prioritize both your emotional well-being and hers. Consent is a fundamental aspect of any relationship, and it's essential that both partners feel comfortable and respected. If your wife is expressing reluctance or discomfort, it's vital to take those feelings seriously.

Reevaluating the living arrangement might be necessary. Are there alternative solutions that can alleviate the financial strain without compromising the emotional well-being of either party? Can you explore options such as finding roommates, downsizing, or seeking financial assistance?

Remember, relationships are complex, and there's no one-size-fits-all solution. What works for one couple might not work for another. The key is to find a balance that respects the needs and boundaries of both individuals involved.

I truly hope that you and your wife can find a resolution that brings peace and fulfillment to both of you. Relationships are a journey, and sometimes seeking external support can make a significant difference. Take care, and remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Wishing you the best!

[Gloria]

It sounds like you're going through a challenging time, and it's important to approach this topic with sensitivity and empathy.

Marriage can be a complex and evolving relationship, and sometimes couples face difficulties that require unconventional solutions. It's clear that you and your wife are currently in a unique situation due to financial pressures and the decision to continue living in the same house while separated. However, it's crucial to consider the emotional and psychological aspects of your arrangement, particularly when it comes to intimacy and consent.

Sexual intimacy is a deeply personal and intimate experience that should be based on mutual desire and consent. It's understandable that you both entered into this arrangement as a means to address your financial situation, but it's essential to ensure that consent is freely given and enthusiastic from both parties involved.

From your description, it seems that your wife's enthusiasm for these encounters has diminished over time. It's important to acknowledge that her feelings and desires may have changed since the agreement was made. It's crucial to have open and honest communication about these issues and to respect each other's boundaries and emotions.

Rather than insisting on forcing the sexual encounters, I encourage you to have an open and compassionate conversation with your wife. Create a safe space where she can express her thoughts and feelings without judgment. Ask her how she's been feeling about the arrangement and if there's anything she would like to discuss or change.

Remember, communication is the key to resolving conflicts and finding solutions. It's possible that your wife may be feeling pressured or uncomfortable with the current arrangement, and it's important to listen to her concerns and validate her emotions. Together, you can explore alternative solutions that address both of your needs and respect each other's boundaries.

Financial struggles can put a significant strain on any relationship, and it's essential to seek support and guidance during these challenging times. Consider reaching out to a professional counselor or therapist who specializes in relationship and financial issues. They can provide you with valuable insights, facilitate productive conversations, and help you navigate this complex situation.

Additionally, it might be beneficial to explore other avenues for financial support. Are there any assistance programs, job opportunities, or alternative living arrangements that could provide your wife with the financial independence she seeks? By actively exploring these options together, you may find a solution that allows both of you to move forward in a way that feels more fulfilling and sustainable.

Remember, relationships require ongoing effort, understanding, and compromise. It's important to prioritize each other's emotional well-being and to work together to find a resolution that respects both parties involved. By fostering open communication, empathy, and mutual respect, you can navigate this challenging period in your lives and find a path forward that brings you both greater happiness and fulfillment.