Cheating

[Someanonymousguy]

Hi. I recently went back to college for my second semester of my freshman year. My girlfriend (now ex) of three and a half years who is a year older than I go to different universities. However, mine is significantly larger as it is a large D1 state school and hers is a very small D3 school in a kind of secluded area. I didn't think I would ever have a problem with being tempted to cheat on her but unfortunately I did it twice. Both times involved a lot of alcohol (not trying to make an excuse for myself) and I also spent the majority of the semester so far pledging a fraternity and after a party is when it happened the second time. I got caught up in the college lifestyle and after cheating the second time I realized how bad of a person I felt and how much I regretted the type of things I was doing. I love my ex very very very much and she is the most incredible woman i have ever met. I don't know why I ever did what I did and I regret it more than anything. I hurt her and I took advantage of her trust and it pains me to see her hurt so much currently, especially since it was something I did. I know I will never do something like this again to anyone because of how much hurt it has caused on both ends but I miss my ex and I really want her back. I don't expect her to forgive me and as much as I would like it, I want the opportunity to one day prove to her how much I love her and that I am someone she can trust again. I felt guilty about everything so I told her about what I did when she came down to visit me during her spring break and just the sight of her looking so hurt still pains me to this moment. She told me she would forgive me but about after a week she said she couldn't get the thought off of her mind and that we needed to break up. She does not want me to contact her until after the semester ends since she is very busy with school and I know very well I need to give her her space. She told me she still loves me, but it just hurts me knowing I ruined a great future that I always saw with her in my life. I know all I can do at this point is wait and give her her space and use this time to improve myself which I have already started to do, but I am just worried and I am unsure about what I should do once the semester ends when I can finally contact her again. I want to win her back but I don't know the best way to go about it especially since I REALLY hurt her bad and I broke her heart. Ultimately, I do want whats best for her though. Sorry, I don't want any advice about how I should just move on and find another girl during this time and just try to forget about her, and I know I should prepare myself for the possibility that it might not work out after school ends, but I know that I truly love her and I was being a dumb guy at college and I lost focus of what was important to me. If anyone could tell me what the best way for me to gain her trust back and to win her back after school ends, I would appreciate that greatly.

[John]

Infidelity is a relationship breaker and if you don't get a handle on how to fix a relationship after cheating is uncovered you will surely lose your partner for good. Having an affair is such a breach of trust that it's difficult for the angry and hurting partner to see life beyond the cheating.

Learning how to mend a broken relationship and recovering from infidelity is not an easy thing to do but relationships rebound from cheating all the time. The key ingredient in those who make it is a commitment to work together and try to restore trust and respect again. If both persons aren't willing to try to fix the relationship then it's probably never going to happen.

If you want to give yourself a fighting chance follow these simple tips on how to fix a relationship after cheating is uncovered.

Apologize Sincerely - This is the most important step you will take in your journey to figure out how to fix a relationship after cheating. If you have already apologized and that's as far as you have gotten, then perhaps you didn't apologize the right way.

For your relationship to start healing, your partner must believe that you are sincere in your apology. Remember, you are viewed as a liar and a cheat so just saying "I'm sorry" isn't enough. Make sure you apologize from the heart and be able to explain why you are sorry. Don't let it seem like you are only sorry you were caught.

Take responsibility for the affair - Admitting to an affair is difficult and it's very easy to try to shift the blame to your partner or even the other person who seduced you. Learning how to repair a relationship after cheating has occurred includes accepting the fact that you had choices and the one you chose wasn't the right one. Don't point fingers unless you are looking in the mirror.

Ask for a second chance but not forgiveness - If you want to earn the chance to fix your relationship after cheating you need to ask for a chance to redeem yourself. However, don't make the mistake of asking that you be forgiven for your adulterous behavior. If you take the right steps in mending your broken relationship after infidelity, your partner will eventually forgive you. I would advise against asking to be forgiven

Be cooperative, patient and supportive - You have probably devastated your lover's heart and mind and she needs time to heal and recover. You probably want to get over this as quickly as possible and you might even grow impatient when your partner questions you again and again and treats you like an untrustworthy partner.

If you have any interest in figuring out how to fix a relationship after cheating then exercise patience and understanding. Healing takes time and so does rebuilding of trust.

[Richard]

Initially you be very completely happy to know that numerous couples have got again together once more after one of them has cheated. Several couple have said that their relationship is now much stronger than ever. As a result if you are actually remorseful in your mistake and really want to study how to get my girlfriend back after cheating on her, here are 3 things I did that will aid you win her back.

Step 1

The very first thing you must do is express regret to your girlfriend and let her recognize that you just made a dreadful mistake and the way unhappy you are. If she may be very angry and refuses to speak to you, don't make the error of irritating her and begging her to speak to you, as this will only drive her further away. Instead write her a letter expressing how sad you might be and what a huge error you've got made. Guarantee her that it's going to by no means occur again. Inform her how a lot you love and miss her and that you want her back. Let her know that you'll wait till she is ready to speak and that you won't drop a line to her once more until then.

It is necessary that you simply maintain your word and don't make contact with her or pester her within the meantime. Belief is now a big issue, so make sure you wait till she is able to speak to you.

Step 2

When your girlfriend is ready to talk to you, be ready to be open and honest in regards to the matter. Don't anticipate her to accept a fast request for forgiveness. She could wish to discuss issues through, so even be prepared to hearken to her without getting defensive or quarrelling. Let her vent and rage at you if she wants to. Permit her let her emotions out.

Step 3

Belief is going to be an important issue for your girlfriend now you have got cheated. Be ready for her to be more suspicious of you and to check up on you extra typically than earlier. But you have to be very patient and try to perceive how insecure you might have made her feel about your relationship. It's essential to therefore do every part you can to make her feel safe in your relationship and able to belief you once more girlfriend back after dishonest is going to be a bit tough nevertheless it really is feasible if you know the precise steps to take.