I want my ex come back, i really need a suggestion

[Nishtha dagar]

Hi, 20 days before my ex had brokeup with me,only 3 months relationship with him, but i have spend my quality times and enjoyed.when he said this to me in last night on fb chat, i was trying to begging or pleading to him only that night,but he had blocked me on messanger after that i am not trying to contact with him, he is not my friends in facebook and he is not using any social chat. 5 days before he had called me by phone, but i can't pickup, then next day he blocked my account on fb. I still ignore, 22 days have almost gone without contect, but i think he is enjoying their life, i realy want him come back, please give me some strategy or suggestion. Pls help me, thanku.

[John]

If your goal is to make your ex boyfriend come back, then you must figure out a thing or two about male psychology. Now that may sound hard because the male mind is mysterious to a woman. Heck, we even confuse ourselves sometimes! But don't worry. We're simpler than you think.

You have to understand that your boyfriend did not break up with you for anything you specifically did or said. Even in cases where the man will try and rationalize the decision with a specific event, this is not what's going on. Look at how many people stay in "bad" or "broken" relationships year after year, despite many logical reasons to break up. Perhaps even you have done this.

Men, and people in general, always break up for emotional reasons, not logical ones. That means to make your ex boyfriend come back, no amount of trying to convince him that you should be together will do any good whatsoever. You will have to change his MOOD, not his mind.

The way he feels about your relationship eroded over time, until it got to the point where he could bear to be without you. Don't worry, it happens a lot in this western society; just look at our divorce rates!

You can make him come back by using his male psychology to your advantage. Men have certain "triggers" or "emotional hot buttons" that make them instantly respond to a woman. With the proper use of psychology, you can actually make him feel the way you need him to to get him back.

It may sound manipulative to you to get your boyfriend back through the use of psychological tricks, but I am trusting that you are a good girlfriend and truly want him to be happy (with you).

If you are prepared to bring your boyfriend back and then treat him with love, respect, and kindness, then my advice is to do whatever it takes to make him see that the two of you belong together.

[Nishtha dagar]

Still don't know..how to do..

[Jane]

First of all, you should realize this: One of the biggest reasons for the way you feel is because of the sudden loss of control. You feel as if you no longer have control of your emotions and your happiness is tied to whether or not your ex boyfriend decides to come back to you. This can be a very scary feeling.

On the other hand, your ex boyfriend is feeling the exact opposite. He knows that he can come back to you whenever he wants. He is in complete control of the situation, which is why it is so much easier for him.

So what is the solution? You need to gain control once again.

Now you're probably asking yourself, "How do I regain control, when I feel so desperate?!"

First of all, you have to accept the break up. Stop trying to figure out how to make my ex boyfriend come back, and start focusing on yourself. You need to give yourself permission to get on with your life and realize that even if you don't get back together with him, you will still be happy again one day. This is a critical part in the process because as long as you depend on him for your happiness, you will never be truly happy.

You also need to become more independent, and in order for that to happen, you have to break contact with your ex for a while. Once you stop talking to him and seeing him, you will slowly, but surely, stop thinking about him as much and your everyday life will become easier.

Not only will this make things easier for you, it will make him curious. He will begin to wonder what's going on and the wheels in his head will start spinning. He will no longer be sure that he has control of the situation and he will start second guessing himself, which will also make him think about you more. He will start to remember all the good times you had together and think less about the negative parts of your relationship (just like you're doing right now).