Is it normal to cry this much?

[ohhhpaige]

I have been long distance from my boyfriend for 3 months now and it’s gonna be another 2 months until I next visit him.

I usually cry/ tear up about once a day feeling frustrated that I can’t be with him physically, or because I’m overthinking our relationship since I’m not with him.

It’s becoming emotionally exhausting. Is this normal? What can I do to work on this if not?

[Shirley]

I totally get what you're going through – being in a long-distance relationship can be tough, and those feelings of frustration, loneliness, and doubt are completely normal. It's a rollercoaster of emotions, and it's okay to have your moments of tears and overthinking. So, first things first, let's talk about why you're feeling this way and then explore some ways to cope with it.

Missing someone you care deeply about is perfectly normal. When you're in a long-distance relationship, you miss out on the physical closeness, shared experiences, and everyday moments. It's like a piece of your daily life is temporarily missing, and that can be emotionally draining.

Overthinking is also par for the course. Absence can make you question things, like "Are we growing apart?" or "What's he doing without me?" These thoughts can be overwhelming, but it's important to remember that trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. It's normal to have doubts, but don't let them consume you.

So, what can you do to cope?

1. Communication is Key: Keep the conversation flowing. Talk about your feelings and concerns with your boyfriend. Chances are, he's feeling similar emotions. This open dialogue will strengthen your bond and provide reassurance.

2. Set Goals and Countdowns: Knowing when you'll see each other again can be comforting. Plan visits and create countdowns together, so you have something to look forward to.

3. Create Your Space: While you're apart, work on your own personal growth and space. Pursue your interests, hobbies, and career goals. This will help you feel more fulfilled in your own life and reduce the emotional burden of missing your partner.

4. Schedule Regular Video Calls: Video calls are a game-changer. They provide that visual and emotional connection that texts and calls can't fully replace. Make them a part of your daily routine.

5. Avoid Constant Monitoring: Don't keep tabs on your partner 24/7. Trust is crucial in a long-distance relationship. Overthinking and jealousy can harm trust, so give each other space and freedom.

6. Lean on Friends and Family: Share your feelings with your support system. They'll understand and offer valuable advice, plus they can help keep you busy when loneliness creeps in.

7. Stay Positive: Focus on the reasons you're in this relationship in the first place. Remind yourself of the love, trust, and happiness you share.

8. Embrace the Upsides: Use this time apart as an opportunity for personal growth. Absence can make the heart grow fonder, and it can also make you appreciate your partner more.

Remember, what you're experiencing is normal, but it doesn't mean it's easy. It's all part of the adventure of love. Stay connected, trust each other, and cherish the moments you do have together. In the meantime, keep your chin up, keep the tissues handy, and know that your love can endure the miles between you.

[John]

I understand how tough it can be to be in a long-distance relationship. The distance can really take a toll on your emotions, and it's completely normal to feel frustrated and overwhelmed at times. So, first of all, let me assure you that what you're experiencing is absolutely normal.

Being physically apart from someone you care about can be emotionally exhausting. It's natural to miss your boyfriend and long for that physical closeness. The distance can make you feel lonely, and that's when the tears start flowing. Overthinking about your relationship is also common when you're not together. You start questioning things, wondering if everything is still as strong as it used to be. These thoughts can be really overwhelming and add to your emotional exhaustion.

But don't worry, there are things you can do to work on this and make it a little easier for yourself. One of the most important things is to communicate openly and honestly with your boyfriend about your feelings. Let him know that you're finding it emotionally exhausting and that you miss him dearly. Sharing your emotions with him can create a sense of understanding and support between you two.

Another thing you can try is to establish a routine for communication. Set aside dedicated time for video calls or phone calls where you can see and hear each other. Having these regular interactions can help bridge the physical distance and make you feel more connected. It's also a good idea to plan fun activities to do together during your calls, like watching a movie simultaneously or playing online games. This can help create shared experiences and make you feel closer to each other.

In addition to that, try to focus on the positives of your relationship and the future. Remind yourself why you're in this relationship and the love you share. Make plans for the next visit and look forward to the time you'll spend together. It can be helpful to distract yourself with hobbies, friends, and activities that bring you joy. Keeping yourself engaged and busy can help reduce overthinking and give you a sense of fulfillment.

Lastly, take care of yourself emotionally. Practice self-care and self-compassion. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel the emotions as they come. Find healthy outlets for your emotions, like journaling or talking to a trusted friend. If you find that your emotional exhaustion is persisting or getting worse, it might be helpful to seek support from a therapist or counselor who can provide guidance tailored to your specific situation.

Remember, it's okay to feel emotionally exhausted in a long-distance relationship, but there are steps you can take to make it more manageable. Hang in there, and before you know it, you'll be reunited with your boyfriend. Stay strong, and take care of yourself along the way. Sending you virtual hugs and support!