Tweet
If you were having a relationship with a man (divorced) he suddenly dies and his grown children ex wife have no idea who you are... but you know all about them. how do you handle it...he died on Wednesday the love of my life. My soulmate.
-
-
Hi Nora,
Your question reminds me of what happened when my own father died.
If you have read some of my past articles you will know my parents hated each other (they are my inspiration in so many ways for the work I do... nobody should scream at each other and beat each other up as much as they did) and when my father died they had been through a vicious divorce.
I remember at the funeral locking eyes with a woman I had never seen before... she was late 50's (like my dad.)
Slim... pretty.
Her eyes were red and puffy... she looked broken, like a puzzle missing a piece.
I found out later she was my Dad's girlfriend.
That she and my father had been seeing for about a year and really seemed to like each other.
That she was a big part of his life... somebody who was there for him as he before his heart stopped.
That she probably knew him better than I did at the end.
So Nora, I feel for you.
And I am sorry to say you are probably going to have to go through this alone.
No matter what you and this man had, you are going to be seen as an outsider to the family in their time of grieving.
Mourn your man... talk about him to your friends... get the support you need from people you know... think of the family when you need to, and do not go to them.
There will be lots of raw feelings around.
I know there was when my father died.
I do run an on-line service if you feel you would like to talk and express your feelings and grief.
Big hugs.
-
Thank you Clinton, very helpful advice. Sorry about the lost of your Dad.Comment
Comment