Why Do Men Just Stop Returning Calls?

[Stella]

Why do men just 'drop' you (I.E. stop returning calls, etc.) rather than being man enough to say they don't want to see you any more?

[Clinton]

Because they're cowards, because they don't want to deal with conflict or potential craziness, and because they think it's the kindest way to let someone down.

Which is, of course, bullshit.

Women do the same thing, by the way.

A few years back I fell HARD for a 5'10" blonde with magical hands . . .

We went on a few dates.

We tumbled into bed together.

I felt a crazy magnetic spark.

I felt my bruised heart opening up to the possibility of "something."

And then the crazy cruel radio silence began and I felt this obnoxious anxiety and anger build in my chest.

So it's not just a "guy" thing.

So . . .

1. When you decide you don't want to see a guy any more, just tell him in as plain language as possible.

2. If a guy doesn't call you back after two attempts, assume he's got stuff going on that has nothing to do with you and move on.

Rejection sucks.

But do you really want to be a guy who's not man enough to tell you what's up anyway?

[Judith]

If he suddenly stopped talking to you it is generally because you've done something that he found unappealing. Dating relationships just don't have the same commitment as longer term partnerships do. Men can be a little indecisive and one small thing can turn them off and make them walk away. Most women don't fully realize this. Even something as seemingly insignificant as commenting on what he orders at dinner or how he needs to shave can be enough to make him break off contact.

You may think that's a bit cold and heartless but unfortunately it's the reality of the dating world. Unless the two of you have forged a strong emotional connection, his interest is hanging by a delicate thread.

So what's a woman to do if the guy she's crazy about just stops talking to her? You can forget him and move on as well. This sounds much easier than it is, but if it's a new relationship and you haven't invested too much of yourself into it, that might be the right choice.

If you care for him and see some potential there, you need to make amends. If you haven't pinpointed what you might have done, that's okay. You can still take steps to remedy the situation. Call him up and let him know that you'd love to have coffee with him. If he doesn't answer, leave a message. Don't apply any pressure or talk at all about how his ignoring you made you feel. Instead, just act friendly, warm and fun. Let him see the best parts of you. Doing this will give him a new perspective and if you want to keep the relationship moving in the right direction, just take your cues from him. The more time he spends with you, the more likely he'll look right past any flaws you may have and focus instead on the parts of you that are irresistible.

[Jane]

Ignoring someone doesn't seem like the best approach to get their attention, but in the case of a man you're dating it works very well. If he's stopped calling you he's sending you a clear message that you need to receive. That message is that he's not putting in the effort to contact you anymore. If you go into panic mode and start calling him incessantly out of fear that he's lost interest, he'll label you as pathetic and wipe your number completely from his memory. Worse, he'll see you as someone who will fill in his time until another woman, someone emotionally stronger in his eyes, comes along.

What many women fail to realize is that men are just as adapt at dating games as we are. They test us just as we test them. He may have stopped calling simply because he's trying to gauge just how strong your interest really is. If you don't try and track him down after a few days, he's going to realize that you're not as hooked on him as he thought you were and he'll get busy trying to grab your interest again.

You can't lose if you ignore a man when he's ignoring you. Either you're showing him that you don't care that he's lost interest or you're making it clear that you're not the type to chase after him begging for his attention. Stay strong and stay away from your phone if he hasn't called. If he wants you, he'll call.

If he likes you, he won't be able to resist the urge to call. In most cases of a man who stopped calling, this is exactly what happens. He starts to fear that she's the one losing interest, so he drops his game face and calls. Let him pursue you. If you follow that one golden rule of dating all of your experiences with men will be that much richer.

[Stella]

I'm indeed very grateful for the advice I got from everyone.

[The Masterpiece]

It could be a number of reasons, he had a goal and achieved it, like poster #2 said, he is a coward, he met someone else, he didn't care enough to communicate his thoughts. Either way, be grateful that he showed his true colors sooner rather than later.