An inexperienced guy needing advices

[Iwey]

Hey everyone, first of all thanks for reading all this (I really don't know yet how long that thing will be but whatever), also I'd like to let you know that I'm French so if you need me to reformulate anything don't hesitate to tell me, now let me introduce the situation

So, I'm really bad with girls. I mean I've just had a single girlfriend in my whole life and I couldn't manage to have feelings for her, even if I tried to hang out, stuff that every couple normally does.

2 Months ago I entered college, where I met a girl that was in my class, I got her phone number somehow and we spoke about anything and everything to know each other. Everything was going pretty well and I was probably over-happy about it. Every time we had a class together she always came up to me and sat next to me (or the opposite), but well that is friendship and I can't call that a sign of interest right ? Some days ago (maybe a week) we had a class together, she arrived first so she sat, keeping a sit next to her for me. However a guy came a took it, they've been laughing all hour long so I thought "man you should stop there" but I wasn't exactly in this mood. So I sent her a text to ask her if the guy she had been next to actually interested her. She explained what I said before, and also told me she wasn't interested at all in that guy, he was just a friend, I was feeling a bit relieved honestly. Also, she added that "it would have been better to be next to each other". That is when I started to think she liked me or was interested in me or whatever.

Tuesday I asked her if she would like going to watch a movie at a cinema with me after our midterm exams, she accepted and she seemed really glad I asked something like that. So yesterday we went to watch a movie (yeah Wednesday night, I know it sucks but she's going to her home today as we have 1 week vacation this Friday, so I didn't really have a choice there).

At the cinema, our arms were always touching but I guess she didn't pay attention to it, I don't know if I can call that a sign of interest honestly. When we arrived at her home, I asked her out but she turned me down, saying she has had problems with her ex-boyfriend when she entered college and she didn't want it to happen again. When I came home I sent her a text to apologize, and she told me that she knows I'm not anything like her ex-boyfriend and that she wanted to keep talking with me like we usually do (we sometimes speak for like 2 hours outside about everything and anything), that she really enjoys doing it, that she knew something like what happened with her ex would happen with me. I replied that I didn't want to be in a cold with her because of the stupid move I made and she was completely fine with that.

However when we saw each other in the first class this morning we didn't even speak together, I just told her "hi" while she was sitting next to one of her friends, in the second class she didn't come to sit next to me. Well I guess this is because of when I asked her out, she must have been feeling troubled, I totally understand, whether if there actually is a cold between the both of us or not.

So, I feel like I went a bit too fast with her and I shouldn't have asked her out yesterday, I know I fucked up on that part but I really wanted to try because I felt like she was interested, that was probably not the case. Now I'd like to know what you guys think I missed and if you think she's interested. Thanks for reading and tell me if you need extra details

[John]

You did absolutely nothing wrong by asking her out. In fact, it's better you asked her out than not trying. You would have blamed yourself if you had not tried. Also, you missed nothing and you were perfect with your moves.

However, now that she is acting cold, I will advice you give her the space she wants. Things will get back to how it used to be after a while.

[Tina]

After reading all you wrote, I concluded that she might interested in you and at the same time might not be. However, there is a high probability that she's interested in you. I will advice you act normal as before, and don't appear as though you're feeling guilty. Also, try to make her feel free around you again, be the man and don't act shy. Act this way, and she will be open to you if she is actually interested in a romantic relationship with you.

[Iwey]

Thank you both for replying !

You did absolutely nothing wrong by asking her out. In fact, it's better you asked her out than not trying. You would have blamed yourself if you had not tried. Also, you missed nothing and you were perfect with your moves.

However, now that she is acting cold, I will advice you give her the space she wants. Things will get back to how it used to be after a while.

If I had knew about the issues she has had with her ex-boyfriend I don't think I would've asked her out because I feel like it's still pretty early between her last relationship and the one we could have gotten into. I don't know if I would've blamed myself because of that fact honestly. I don't really know if my moves were perfect but thanks !

Yeah, she'll get the space she wants, our 1 week vacation will help hopefully !


Today, 01:54 AM
After reading all you wrote, I concluded that she might interested in you and at the same time might not be. However, there is a high probability that she's interested in you. I will advice you act normal as before, and don't appear as though you're feeling guilty. Also, try to make her feel free around you again, be the man and don't act shy. Act this way, and she will be open to you if she is actually interested in a romantic relationship with you.

Not knowing if she's interested in me really is a pain to be honest haha, yeah I can act as before with her pretty easily as I'm the kind of guy who doesn't think about the past. I just actually hope things will be the same as before, thank you !

[SmallTalk]

I think she isn't interested in a relationship at the moment. She enjoyed spending time with you as a friend. Now she is scared that you could interpret everything she does as a sign of interest. She is protecting herself because she doesn't want to get hurt again or hurt you (because we don't know which problems she had with the last guy).
Maybe it could turn out to be a relationship but don't be to disappointed if it doesn't do that. Perhaps she meets another guy - boom - nobody can tell ...
Perhaps it would be better to keep distant - not just for the vacation week.

[Iwey]

I think she isn't interested in a relationship at the moment. She enjoyed spending time with you as a friend. Now she is scared that you could interpret everything she does as a sign of interest. She is protecting herself because she doesn't want to get hurt again or hurt you (because we don't know which problems she had with the last guy).
Maybe it could turn out to be a relationship but don't be to disappointed if it doesn't do that. Perhaps she meets another guy - boom - nobody can tell ...
Perhaps it would be better to keep distant - not just for the vacation week.

Yeah, I was also thinking she isn't interested in a relationship yet. I'll see how she acts with me after our week vacation, if she keeps acting cold I guess I'll keep my distances from her. Also, she doesn't seem to be so cold when she replies to me when we text, I don't really get her haha, thanks for your advice