Gf’s ex still hangs out with her, what to do?

[simplyjosh36]

It’s been a few months now since I got into a relationship with this woman from Colombia. We met each other through an international dating site online called LoveMe. Her last relationship ended about a year ago and since then, she’s kept a strong friendship with her ex-lover.


I trust that there is no monkey business going on between them and that I shouldn’t worry about having a third party involved but it’s hard not to be bothered by it. The thing is that before she got into a relationship with her ex, they were best friends. When they broke up, they wanted to save their years of friendship together.


That is why they casually keep in touch and often times hang out. Now, I’m not much of a believer in ex-lovers staying as friends after breaking up, but I don’t want to stir something with my girlfriend about the matter. It’s hard to look past it whenever my girlfriend spends the day with him or grabbed a cup of coffee. Be it for only a minute, it’s really difficult for me the more this goes on.


I don’t want to be selfish and as much as possible I want to keep a calm composure regarding the issue, how do I deal with this in a mature and passive way? Is there even a method to be okay with this? I don’t want to fight with my girlfriend about this. Don’t get me wrong, I trust and love her with all my heart but I really want to get this off my chest.


Any amount of advice and tips would be tremendously helpful. Do you guys know some ways on how I can at least rest easy with the thought that she’s friends with her ex-lover/ best friend? Thanks so much in advance for any insights. I’m also very open in listening to past experiences and personal opinions.

[Zinok]

I think that you should calmly talk to her about your concerns. As long as you aren`t attacking her, or telling her that she cannot see him anymore, it is reasonable for you to have your worries. You meeting him on your next visit, or talking to him online, might help alleviate your fears.

[Bill]

I won't advice you to be with a girl whose ex still hangs out with her. She may be cheating on you without you knowing. Be wise!

[Evelyn]

I will suggest you talk to her about it, and let her know you aren't comfortable with her seeing her ex. Give her the option to either stop hanging out with her ex or lose you for good.