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I met my boyfriend 8 months ago following his official separation with his ex-wife, one week prior to our first date. Mathieu is a father of three, his ex-wife is the mother of his two youngest children.
As soon as I met him, he was very honest about his separation. He told me that she had moved out very recently but his relationship wasn’t going well since over a year and they were separated for a couple of months while still living together.
A couple of weeks after our fist date I was a little skeptical about him because he had pictures of their marriage up on the wall and his Facebook was filled with the pictures as well. According to him, he just didn’t have the time to take them down and delete the pictures on Facebook. It was only until a few months in our relationship that he got rid of them. My biggest concern is that he wasn’t posting our relationship status, he did it only 5 months in our relationship when I talked to him about my concern.
Throughout our first month living together, I was very positive about his ex-wife and I demonstrated a lot of patience and understanding on how he needed to stay in contact with her for his children’s sake. I noticed something wasn’t right when Mathieu would tell me on a regular basis that he was fighting over text with his ex-wife. I started to question myself about their situation, even though he clearly told me that their relationship was officially over and both agreed on keeping a friendly parent relationship together.
At that point, I was in such a doubtful state, even though I know I was going to sabotage my boyfriend’s privacy, I decided to sneak through his phone to read their texts. To my surprise, most of their conversations were about their parenthood and their children. Unfortunately, there was a couple of texts that were extremely alarming to me. She was texting malicious things about me on a regular basis, she also sent him a text asking if I was the love of his life, he responded, he is trying. Another text was a sexual joke such as, ‘’ find someone who could make you climax just as much as they make you laugh’’. He responded: ‘’sorry I think you sent this by mistake.’’ She said, ‘’ HA HA no, send this to your girlfriend to see how she will feel.’’ He replied back to this saying that it might sound stupid but he is jealous of the person that sent her that message.
Unfortunately, I lost of confidence in him ever since I saw those texts. When I confronted him about it, he told me that his reply meant that he is jealous of her new boyfriend in his children’s life, trying to take his role as a father. I can’t even begin by saying how awful his comeback reply makes me feel. I can’t believe that is the actual sense of his sentence.
I decided to continue with our relationship, because he managed somehow to control their discussions and limit his replies when she starts a conversation. As of today, he generally answers when the conversation is about his children.
On the other hand, I never managed to put this story behind me because, deeply, in my heart, I felt like I was treated like a rebound, I also felt betrayed so early in this relationship.
Today, I am looking to get advice on this, our relationship is going very well, but, I need someone to give their point of view since I am so negative about us lately.
Thank you!
As soon as I met him, he was very honest about his separation. He told me that she had moved out very recently but his relationship wasn’t going well since over a year and they were separated for a couple of months while still living together.
A couple of weeks after our fist date I was a little skeptical about him because he had pictures of their marriage up on the wall and his Facebook was filled with the pictures as well. According to him, he just didn’t have the time to take them down and delete the pictures on Facebook. It was only until a few months in our relationship that he got rid of them. My biggest concern is that he wasn’t posting our relationship status, he did it only 5 months in our relationship when I talked to him about my concern.
Throughout our first month living together, I was very positive about his ex-wife and I demonstrated a lot of patience and understanding on how he needed to stay in contact with her for his children’s sake. I noticed something wasn’t right when Mathieu would tell me on a regular basis that he was fighting over text with his ex-wife. I started to question myself about their situation, even though he clearly told me that their relationship was officially over and both agreed on keeping a friendly parent relationship together.
At that point, I was in such a doubtful state, even though I know I was going to sabotage my boyfriend’s privacy, I decided to sneak through his phone to read their texts. To my surprise, most of their conversations were about their parenthood and their children. Unfortunately, there was a couple of texts that were extremely alarming to me. She was texting malicious things about me on a regular basis, she also sent him a text asking if I was the love of his life, he responded, he is trying. Another text was a sexual joke such as, ‘’ find someone who could make you climax just as much as they make you laugh’’. He responded: ‘’sorry I think you sent this by mistake.’’ She said, ‘’ HA HA no, send this to your girlfriend to see how she will feel.’’ He replied back to this saying that it might sound stupid but he is jealous of the person that sent her that message.
Unfortunately, I lost of confidence in him ever since I saw those texts. When I confronted him about it, he told me that his reply meant that he is jealous of her new boyfriend in his children’s life, trying to take his role as a father. I can’t even begin by saying how awful his comeback reply makes me feel. I can’t believe that is the actual sense of his sentence.
I decided to continue with our relationship, because he managed somehow to control their discussions and limit his replies when she starts a conversation. As of today, he generally answers when the conversation is about his children.
On the other hand, I never managed to put this story behind me because, deeply, in my heart, I felt like I was treated like a rebound, I also felt betrayed so early in this relationship.
Today, I am looking to get advice on this, our relationship is going very well, but, I need someone to give their point of view since I am so negative about us lately.
Thank you!
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