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Is our friendship appropriate?

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  • Is our friendship appropriate?

    I met this girl at a summer job last year and we clicked. We started going out with mutual friends and got close.
    We'd play fight, sit on each other's laps. We hold hands when we're alone or crossing the street. We call each other baby, hun, love etc. When we're out in a group, she gives me the most attention. But sometimes it got a little strange. We'd have intense eye contact and I've caught her staring at my lips on several occasions.
    One day she told me "I think I've a crush on you. Is it weird?" She had a boyfriend at the time (we're both girls) so I laughed it off. Another time she said "I'm falling for you."

    She used to invite me over to her house while her parents slept. We would smoke and cuddle in her bed, then she'd sneak me out by morning. One day before I was about to leave, she kissed my forehead and said she loves me. Then she leaned in and kissed the tip of my nose and giggled.
    Then one day her mom walked in on her cuddling into me on her bed. Her mother called her disgusting and hit her infront of me. (No not exaggerating)

    She travelled back for college and calls me everyday and we speak for hours at night. She always tells me she misses me and my cuddles, and how much she adores and loves me.
    Sometimes she sends me "sexy" photos/videos revealing her body. And once when we video called she was only wearing a bra and sweats.
    She'd say things that she's addicted to me and can't live without me and she's ready to pick me over her bf. she also said she feels he's cheating on her and she doesn't feel the same way she used to. And then she broke up with him.
    A few days later she told me she had a dream where we were fighting and then I kissed her lips. She said it felt good. I avoided that subject but she brings it up sometimes to joke about it.
    She said she wants to travel with me abroad to a new college and move in together. And so we did.
    Initially I supported her financially But we've been fighting a lot. She would bite me really hard or slap me and I would get traumatic flashbacks from the abuse I went through. And I would drink a lot. Then we decided she should move out.
    She started going around and talking badly behind my back to boys especially, saying I was gay and tried to "kiss her".
    She also asked me once if I had feelings for her to which I denied.
    She'd pull me in 1 day and then start fighting with me the next.
    The last thing was she decided to end our friendship. She said "I was in love with you." Then rushed "as a friend."

    Please help

  • #2
    She took you for granted and she isn't a good friend. She isn't different from her abusive mother. It's best you get her off your life for good.

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    • #3
      Your friendship with her is absolutely inappropriate. She is an abuser and an evil person. She lured you into moving in with her and then turned into a monster and started abusing you. I will suggest you stop talking to her complete, and get rid of her from your life.
      Last edited by Ella; 06-13-2018, 01:56 AM.

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      • #4
        I also agree ,, she is not someone you would want to keep in your life, as soon as you are away from the people who can protect you and your family she chooses to show her true colors to you. There is a saying that goes, "when people show you who they are believe them"

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        • #5
          Sounds to me she was abused as a child too (just by what her mother exhibited tells me there has been other times of physical abuse), so the behavior carries over into adulthood. It's sad that she doesn't know how to cope with situations/rejection. You being abused yourself, need to stay away from situations like this. Things just fell apart for whatever reason. This is good learning experience for you. Now you know that, that kind of behavior is unacceptable, and you must remove yourself from it. There is no fixing this. The best thing you can do is block/delete/and go no contact. You will feel better about it in no time.

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          • #6

            Originally posted by Kara97 View Post
            Please help

            I'm sorry, but she seems like a sexual predator. You need better friends.

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