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I have no idea how to write these things, I’ve never really done this before.
A year ago, I met this girl who was not like any girl I’ve met before or after. She is so sweet and kind and caring, smart and funny, beautiful, and unique. We have many of the same interests, and we hit it off right away. However, she had a boyfriend, and they had been dating off and on for about half a year at that point. So we stayed just friends, but she talked to me like we were more than friends. She wanted to hang out with me, she talked about how much she liked how tall I am and how much she likes to hug me, and more and more stuff like that I won’t get in to. But most importantly, we trusted each other and helped each other out when we were down. And over time, I really grew to like her as more than a friend. And first, I guess it was just a crush, but then it developed into love. And all the whole, she was still dating her boyfiend. And at first, I thought it was ok. I mean, I loved her, but he seemed like a nice guy, and as long as she was happy, that’s all that mattered.
But then, as time went on, I learned more about him. And he is a really big a**hole to say the least. He is controlling of her, does not appreciate all he does for her, makes her feel bad and guilty whenever he does something wrong, and stuff like that. And I got worried. I tried to talk to her about it, but she would always feel like she needed to make excuses for him. I know she could tell he was wrong, but he was really good at making her blame herself for everything he did. And so this went on for a year. Finally, a week ago, I told her how I felt about her, and that I never tried to be anything more than her friend. And she said she always kinda knew it, and was initially ok with it. But then I said I love her, and she didn’t know how to feel about that, I guess she only thought I liked her, like a crush I suppose. And we took some time to talk about it, about a week, and she decided she wanted some time, and I told her I will respect that, and I will. I really care about her, I just want her to be happy. And I know that she will probably never feel the same way about me as I feel about her. But... it still hurts. I miss her so much. I don’t have her to talk to, and it feels like a big part of my life is now missing. She is the most amazing person I have ever met and I can’t imagine life without her. But what really worries me is... I was the only one she really talked to about when her boyfriend was being a d*ck to her, and I was the only one who would be willing to tell her it was wrong of him, and I feel like it kept him from doing the worst things to her. But now that we are taking a break, I know her boyfriend is going to see it as an excuse to treat her worse, and I know she will still make excuses for it. I am really worried about her I guess. I know that me and her may never be together, and know I will have to find a way to make peace with that. I don’t want to see her get hurt though, and I know he will keep on hurting her. I don’t know what to do... I just want her to be ok, and I don’t want want him to be an a**hole to her anymore... I just feel really scared and I don’t know what to do. I suppose nobody will probably read this ever. I just don’t know who else to talk to. She was really the only friend I had, and as of today we aren’t talking for a while
A year ago, I met this girl who was not like any girl I’ve met before or after. She is so sweet and kind and caring, smart and funny, beautiful, and unique. We have many of the same interests, and we hit it off right away. However, she had a boyfriend, and they had been dating off and on for about half a year at that point. So we stayed just friends, but she talked to me like we were more than friends. She wanted to hang out with me, she talked about how much she liked how tall I am and how much she likes to hug me, and more and more stuff like that I won’t get in to. But most importantly, we trusted each other and helped each other out when we were down. And over time, I really grew to like her as more than a friend. And first, I guess it was just a crush, but then it developed into love. And all the whole, she was still dating her boyfiend. And at first, I thought it was ok. I mean, I loved her, but he seemed like a nice guy, and as long as she was happy, that’s all that mattered.
But then, as time went on, I learned more about him. And he is a really big a**hole to say the least. He is controlling of her, does not appreciate all he does for her, makes her feel bad and guilty whenever he does something wrong, and stuff like that. And I got worried. I tried to talk to her about it, but she would always feel like she needed to make excuses for him. I know she could tell he was wrong, but he was really good at making her blame herself for everything he did. And so this went on for a year. Finally, a week ago, I told her how I felt about her, and that I never tried to be anything more than her friend. And she said she always kinda knew it, and was initially ok with it. But then I said I love her, and she didn’t know how to feel about that, I guess she only thought I liked her, like a crush I suppose. And we took some time to talk about it, about a week, and she decided she wanted some time, and I told her I will respect that, and I will. I really care about her, I just want her to be happy. And I know that she will probably never feel the same way about me as I feel about her. But... it still hurts. I miss her so much. I don’t have her to talk to, and it feels like a big part of my life is now missing. She is the most amazing person I have ever met and I can’t imagine life without her. But what really worries me is... I was the only one she really talked to about when her boyfriend was being a d*ck to her, and I was the only one who would be willing to tell her it was wrong of him, and I feel like it kept him from doing the worst things to her. But now that we are taking a break, I know her boyfriend is going to see it as an excuse to treat her worse, and I know she will still make excuses for it. I am really worried about her I guess. I know that me and her may never be together, and know I will have to find a way to make peace with that. I don’t want to see her get hurt though, and I know he will keep on hurting her. I don’t know what to do... I just want her to be ok, and I don’t want want him to be an a**hole to her anymore... I just feel really scared and I don’t know what to do. I suppose nobody will probably read this ever. I just don’t know who else to talk to. She was really the only friend I had, and as of today we aren’t talking for a while
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