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I feel lame even writing this, im
usually not one to overanalyse a situation but I think I need outside opinions to help me see things objectively. Sorry for the novel, I’m just trying to give as much info as possible.
Background: I’ve been dating a guy for 3 months now, I’m 27, he’s 30. We both came out of serious relationships earlier in the year but both ended on good terms just due to incompatibilities/not being right for each other. Neither of us wanted to rush into another relationship but we connected instantly and decided to see where things lead between us.
We’ve been going from strength to strength, and we really are incredible together. He said he originally planned on staying single for a year but didn’t expect to meet anyone like me. I asked him if he would prefer that I let him do his thing and focus on himself, then we can see if there’s still something there further down the track. He said didn’t want that anymore so we kept seeing each other.
Ive met his friends and coworkers a bunch of times, he’s met mine, we’ve talked histories and insecurities and he constantly says how much he likes me. For the first two months we would often be at each other’s house 2 - 4 nights in a row.
Now for the issue: over the last few weeks he seem a to be increasingly busy all the time. I know he has been working longer hours but this just seems like he always has something on. Rather than seeing each other every few days it’s been once a week at most because he’s always busy or tired. The messaging has dropped off and the interest from his side seems to have waned rather a lot. The previous affection he showed me hasn’t been there in a few weeks, though when we see each other it seems to still be there. The last week especially, he has ignored most of my messages (I’ve only sent 1 a day at most) and then just said “sorry I’ve had heaps on”.
The thing is, I’ve only ever been in unhealthy relationships and I don’t know if I’m overreacting and he genuinely is busy, or is he just using that as a smokescreen because he’s losing interest? I’m not clingy and I have no interest in another relationship where I’m putting in all the effort.. do men really just go through patches where they have to withdraw a bit? Do I just give him space and hope he eventually comes around? Or is he just politely trying to distance himself. Please help! I really like this guy.
usually not one to overanalyse a situation but I think I need outside opinions to help me see things objectively. Sorry for the novel, I’m just trying to give as much info as possible.
Background: I’ve been dating a guy for 3 months now, I’m 27, he’s 30. We both came out of serious relationships earlier in the year but both ended on good terms just due to incompatibilities/not being right for each other. Neither of us wanted to rush into another relationship but we connected instantly and decided to see where things lead between us.
We’ve been going from strength to strength, and we really are incredible together. He said he originally planned on staying single for a year but didn’t expect to meet anyone like me. I asked him if he would prefer that I let him do his thing and focus on himself, then we can see if there’s still something there further down the track. He said didn’t want that anymore so we kept seeing each other.
Ive met his friends and coworkers a bunch of times, he’s met mine, we’ve talked histories and insecurities and he constantly says how much he likes me. For the first two months we would often be at each other’s house 2 - 4 nights in a row.
Now for the issue: over the last few weeks he seem a to be increasingly busy all the time. I know he has been working longer hours but this just seems like he always has something on. Rather than seeing each other every few days it’s been once a week at most because he’s always busy or tired. The messaging has dropped off and the interest from his side seems to have waned rather a lot. The previous affection he showed me hasn’t been there in a few weeks, though when we see each other it seems to still be there. The last week especially, he has ignored most of my messages (I’ve only sent 1 a day at most) and then just said “sorry I’ve had heaps on”.
The thing is, I’ve only ever been in unhealthy relationships and I don’t know if I’m overreacting and he genuinely is busy, or is he just using that as a smokescreen because he’s losing interest? I’m not clingy and I have no interest in another relationship where I’m putting in all the effort.. do men really just go through patches where they have to withdraw a bit? Do I just give him space and hope he eventually comes around? Or is he just politely trying to distance himself. Please help! I really like this guy.
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