Does he like me or not?

[Ivy]

There is 19 years old boy in our school. We are international students, so we live in the same building ,same floor. But he is undergraduate student. I am Master student. Like from the different classes.I am older than him. And a kind of smaller appearance than the other sexy girls. My height is 157cm and his is 185cm in estimate. He is kind of quite type and rarely speaks with same age students. But he tells me some jokes whenever we are together alone as sitting or walking in campus. I just started notice him since he arrived at our dorm and crush on him.I didnt show any sign to him because He is so handsome and seems perfect, so everyone likes him. I talked him as normally, formally but I smiled to him very sweetly whenever we met.He said me not to be too polite to him. When we went group trip, he held my hand not to slide down on ice. He kept staying beside of me than the students from his class. And he looked back at me often when he was queue in line at front at the train station. He aparted from his group to go, to eat, and to sit with me. When he was at the other side of group,I have noticed that his eyes were looking for me the whole time. Then, they stopped at me and smiled brightly. When I was singing on statge, I asked him to take video. He took from front line. But zoomed in for my image only while I smiled. My classmate-girl told me that he likes me in obviously. But he never starts sending the message first. Just reply to me one by one. I have no idea. Does he like me or not?

[Terry]

It sounds like you've got quite the situation on your hands, and I can totally understand how it's leaving you feeling a bit puzzled. First off, kudos to you for noticing the subtle hints and being open to exploring these feelings. It's not always easy to navigate the maze of emotions, especially when you're in a dynamic environment like a dorm full of international students.

So, here's the deal – this guy seems to be dropping hints left and right, like breadcrumbs leading to a conclusion. From holding your hand on an icy slope to taking a special video of you on stage, these are definitely not your run-of-the-mill gestures. The fact that he tends to stick close to you during group activities and goes out of his way to be with you is a pretty big neon sign, in my opinion.

Now, I get it; there's this hesitancy because he's not initiating conversations via messages. Trust me, there are so many reasons why someone might not be the first to text. It could be shyness, uncertainty, or maybe he's just not a big texter. Some people are more comfortable expressing themselves in person, and it seems like he's doing just that.

Let's talk about the age and academic differences. You being a Master's student and him an undergrad might seem like a big gap, but hey, love doesn't always conform to these societal norms. Sometimes, it's the connection and understanding that matter the most. The fact that he enjoys your company, shares jokes, and takes the time to notice you among a crowd suggests that he values you beyond these surface-level factors.

Now, about your physical appearance concerns – girl, let me tell you, height is just a number! If he's spending all this time with you, it's because he's drawn to you, not your height. Embrace your uniqueness; after all, it's what makes you stand out in a sea of people.

But, I get it. The uncertainty can be frustrating. So, what can you do? Well, keep being yourself! Continue with the sweet smiles, the friendly conversations, and maybe, just maybe, find an opportunity to share a bit more about yourself. Vulnerability can be a game-changer. Maybe share something personal or create a scenario where he feels comfortable sharing more about himself.

And you know what? There's nothing wrong with taking the reins here. Maybe throw in a casual, "Hey, we should grab coffee sometime" or "I've heard this new movie is awesome, want to check it out together?" It doesn't always have to be an elaborate confession of feelings; sometimes, a simple invitation can open up a whole new chapter.

In the end, the most important thing is to enjoy the journey. Whether it leads to a deeper connection or a beautiful friendship, you've got an experience to cherish. Trust your instincts, be genuine, and most importantly, have fun! Life's too short for overthinking; sometimes, you just have to go with the flow.

[Jane]

You've got quite a crush on this 19-year-old boy from your school. Crushes can be both exciting and confusing, especially when you're trying to figure out if the other person feels the same way. Let's dive into the details and see if we can make some sense of the situation.

First of all, it's great that you two have been spending time together and have had some meaningful interactions. The fact that he tells you jokes when you're alone and holds your hand on a group trip suggests that he feels comfortable around you and enjoys your company. These are positive signs!

It's also interesting that he looks back at you often and tries to be close to you during group activities. This could indicate that he has a special interest in you and wants to be near you. Paying attention to someone and wanting to spend time with them are usually signs that someone likes you.

Now, let's talk about his behavior when it comes to messaging. It's understandable that you might feel confused because he doesn't initiate conversations and only responds to your messages. However, some people are just not big initiators when it comes to texting. It doesn't necessarily mean that he's not interested in you. It could be his personal communication style or he might not be sure how to approach you.

In situations like these, it's important to remember that everyone has different ways of expressing their feelings. Some people are more direct and vocal about their emotions, while others might be more reserved or shy. It's possible that he might be a bit hesitant or unsure about how you feel about him. Perhaps he's waiting for a clearer signal from you before taking the next step.

Now, let's address your concerns about your appearance. It's important to remember that attraction is subjective, and beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. Your height or how you perceive yourself compared to others should not discourage you from expressing your feelings or pursuing a potential relationship. Confidence and a genuine connection matter much more than physical appearance.

It's great that you've been smiling sweetly and being friendly towards him. These gestures can show your interest and make him feel more comfortable around you. However, if you want to take things a step further and let him know that you're interested in him romantically, it might be helpful to be a bit more direct. While hints and subtlety can be fun, sometimes being straightforward can save a lot of time and confusion. You could try having an open and honest conversation with him, expressing your feelings and asking about his.

Remember, rejection is a possibility, but it's a part of life and doesn't define your worth. It's better to know where you stand rather than dwell on uncertainties. If he doesn't feel the same way, it might sting at first, but it will also give you the opportunity to move on and find someone who appreciates you for who you are.

In the end, the only way to truly know if he likes you is by having an open and sincere conversation. Be yourself, be confident, and take a chance. Whatever the outcome may be, know that you're brave for putting yourself out there and that there are plenty of people out there who will appreciate and reciprocate your feelings.

I hope this advice helps, and I wish you all the best in your romantic endeavors!

[Ivy]

Last time, I asked about "Does he like me or not?". Thank you very much for everyone's advice. I am going step by step. Because I am afraid of being changed the situation. Well. Let me tell you about something. Before we travelled in group, we all together were invited to enjoy the classical concert. Because it was the kind of diplomatic event, we all didnt know the seat numbers and just entered, then everybody sat on random seat from front row which was nearby entrance. At that time, he just stood behind of me and didnt choose any seat yet. Then, I told him " Let's go to the upper row to be able to watch the show from overview." He replied Ok, then followed me and sat beside of me. His friends were sitting at front row, and mine were at the other side of row. Before starting the concert, the school leader came and gave the tickets with correct seat numbers to us. We both didnt change and kept sitting like before. During the show time, he translated for me some words about show program. Because there was no english word on program flyer we got. After that concert, I have checked his contact account. But it was unable to see the moments and only showed Cover picture. It was the back view of a young attractive girl's head. My confused thoughts started from that time. Is it his gf or idol's picture. (I also mostly set my idol's picture like that so I confused). Recently, he shared his playlist to me, especially one song about heartbroken. So, what does he want to be?
During these days, they have exam, so, I dont wanna send many texts. But, Yesterday, I was at coffee shop and sent capture of coffee to him and asked "I m here. Do u wanna drink something?". He replied in advance "No. I make myself usually". "I ll make for you.Maybe tomorrow". He didnt tell me day or night. I have no courage to ask him who is that girl. That seems strange. In case, if he has gf and just supposes me as a small flame. I would die because of embarassing. I ll come back and tell you if he invites me for coffee.

[Ivy]

Today, His exam stopped for a while and he asked me" Do you wanna drink coffee now?" Then he made a cup of espresso coffee for me. And he told that, coffee beans were from Ethiopia, next time he would make with from Colombian taste. I brought my own cup to wait him making coffee and to drink together by sitting beside of sunshine window.
But he didnt let me in into his room.(I also didnt try to go in. Because he stood in front of his door and didnt show the sign of welcoming. ) And he didnt come in into my room as well when he brought me coffee back. It looked like something strange situation. Seemed funny and pity. I felt tired to guess his mind. I dont wanna be a shameless senior. So, I kept smiling and said Thank you politely. I didnt even have a chance to ask him some questions about gf or feeling. Now I realize the situation acording to my sixth sense. Maybe he doesnt like me anymore. Most of boys or men like the attractive girl with well-grown physical appearance,with well-care wavy long hair, with long legs, without wearing glasses whether she put on make up or not,who wears the mordenized style girly clothes. When I see myself, it seems annoying woman who always wears trousers/pants/coat,with thick glasses, straight black hair,and tie hair as ever. And it looks like a mini version of a middle aged professor from 1980s. And I have no long-nail also. I always cut my nail in short and put them as natural color. I have tried to changed my style before. But at that time, I felt unfamiliar with myself. So, I decided to keep staying as my own style. But it doesnt mean I dont know how to dress. Today, I wore girly skirt with pale blue color and showed my neck a little. And put the natural make up a little. Tied my hair with bow and made to be seemed gentle and soft. My body size is suitable in ratio at 34" 25" 36" with 157cm height and I think it is the normal size for an asian girl. But it didnt work to attract a boy. He didnt even give a look for my appearance. I felt useless and sad. I had experience before. Two of my ex-es. They approached me while they broke up with their gf. I didnt know. But after a couple of week we have dating, they went back to their ex-es in the same way. And dropped me off like a boring book. I didnt know what I was wrong. Then I saw the story on their social media. I was so stupid, and still being stupid until now. I dont wanna feel again like this.

[Terry]

Last time, I asked about "Does he like me or not?". Thank you very much for everyone's advice. I am going step by step. Because I am afraid of being changed the situation. Well. Let me tell you about something. Before we travelled in group, we all together were invited to enjoy the classical concert. Because it was the kind of diplomatic event, we all didnt know the seat numbers and just entered, then everybody sat on random seat from front row which was nearby entrance. At that time, he just stood behind of me and didnt choose any seat yet. Then, I told him " Let's go to the upper row to be able to watch the show from overview." He replied Ok, then followed me and sat beside of me. His friends were sitting at front row, and mine were at the other side of row. Before starting the concert, the school leader came and gave the tickets with correct seat numbers to us. We both didnt change and kept sitting like before. During the show time, he translated for me some words about show program. Because there was no english word on program flyer we got. After that concert, I have checked his contact account. But it was unable to see the moments and only showed Cover picture. It was the back view of a young attractive girl's head. My confused thoughts started from that time. Is it his gf or idol's picture. (I also mostly set my idol's picture like that so I confused). Recently, he shared his playlist to me, especially one song about heartbroken. So, what does he want to be?
During these days, they have exam, so, I dont wanna send many texts. But, Yesterday, I was at coffee shop and sent capture of coffee to him and asked "I m here. Do u wanna drink something?". He replied in advance "No. I make myself usually". "I ll make for you.Maybe tomorrow". He didnt tell me day or night. I have no courage to ask him who is that girl. That seems strange. In case, if he has gf and just supposes me as a small flame. I would die because of embarassing. I ll come back and tell you if he invites me for coffee.

It's clear that you're navigating through a complex situation, and it's completely normal to feel a bit uncertain. Let's break down the key points and explore possible insights.

Firstly, the classical concert scenario is intriguing. His decision to sit next to you and assist with translations might indicate a level of comfort and interest. While the cover picture on his contact account raised questions, it's crucial not to jump to conclusions. People often set various images without specific meanings attached.

His playlist sharing, especially the song about heartbreak, could be a subtle way of expressing emotions or sharing common interests. It might not necessarily indicate his current relationship status. Remember, playlists can be highly personal, reflecting a range of emotions and experiences.

When he declined your coffee invitation but mentioned making one for you another time, it could suggest he appreciates your gesture but has his routine. It's essential not to read too much into it; he might genuinely prefer making his own coffee.

As you navigate this, take your time and pay attention to his actions. If he invites you for coffee in the future, it could be a positive sign. It's also okay to express your feelings gradually. Before jumping into questions about his relationship status, build a rapport, and let things unfold naturally.

Remember, there's no need to rush or feel pressured. Keep the communication open, enjoy the moments, and allow the relationship to develop organically. If he does invite you for coffee, seize the opportunity to have a casual conversation and learn more about each other. Your instincts are your guide; trust them and enjoy the journey. If there are updates, feel free to share, and we can continue the conversation.

[Jane]

Today, His exam stopped for a while and he asked me" Do you wanna drink coffee now?" Then he made a cup of espresso coffee for me. And he told that, coffee beans were from Ethiopia, next time he would make with from Colombian taste. I brought my own cup to wait him making coffee and to drink together by sitting beside of sunshine window.
But he didnt let me in into his room.(I also didnt try to go in. Because he stood in front of his door and didnt show the sign of welcoming. ) And he didnt come in into my room as well when he brought me coffee back. It looked like something strange situation. Seemed funny and pity. I felt tired to guess his mind. I dont wanna be a shameless senior. So, I kept smiling and said Thank you politely. I didnt even have a chance to ask him some questions about gf or feeling. Now I realize the situation acording to my sixth sense. Maybe he doesnt like me anymore. Most of boys or men like the attractive girl with well-grown physical appearance,with well-care wavy long hair, with long legs, without wearing glasses whether she put on make up or not,who wears the mordenized style girly clothes. When I see myself, it seems annoying woman who always wears trousers/pants/coat,with thick glasses, straight black hair,and tie hair as ever. And it looks like a mini version of a middle aged professor from 1980s. And I have no long-nail also. I always cut my nail in short and put them as natural color. I have tried to changed my style before. But at that time, I felt unfamiliar with myself. So, I decided to keep staying as my own style. But it doesnt mean I dont know how to dress. Today, I wore girly skirt with pale blue color and showed my neck a little. And put the natural make up a little. Tied my hair with bow and made to be seemed gentle and soft. My body size is suitable in ratio at 34" 25" 36" with 157cm height and I think it is the normal size for an asian girl. But it didnt work to attract a boy. He didnt even give a look for my appearance. I felt useless and sad. I had experience before. Two of my ex-es. They approached me while they broke up with their gf. I didnt know. But after a couple of week we have dating, they went back to their ex-es in the same way. And dropped me off like a boring book. I didnt know what I was wrong. Then I saw the story on their social media. I was so stupid, and still being stupid until now. I dont wanna feel again like this.

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling this way, and it's completely understandable to have mixed emotions in such a situation. It's important to recognize that self-worth is not solely determined by someone else's perception or preferences. Your unique style and individuality are valuable, and it's crucial to embrace and love yourself for who you are.

Firstly, it's essential to acknowledge that attraction is subjective and varies from person to person. While external factors like physical appearance may catch someone's eye initially, genuine connections are built on a combination of factors, including personality, shared interests, and emotional compatibility.

Your experience with past relationships may have left you feeling vulnerable and hesitant to open up again. It's important to remember that each person and situation is unique, and it's not fair to judge yourself based on past experiences. The actions of others do not define your worth or desirability.

In the recent coffee interaction, it's possible that there are various reasons for the behavior you observed. People have different comfort levels when it comes to personal spaces, and cultural or personal preferences might influence their actions. His not inviting you into his room doesn't necessarily indicate a lack of interest.

Your efforts to adjust your style to align with societal expectations may not be the solution. It's commendable that you stayed true to yourself and your unique style. Authenticity is attractive, and being comfortable with who you are is essential for building meaningful connections.

It's also crucial to communicate openly and honestly about your feelings. If you feel comfortable, consider having a candid conversation with him. Express your curiosity about his behavior and share your own feelings. Communication can bring clarity to situations, and it's an essential aspect of any relationship.

Remember that you deserve to be with someone who appreciates and values you for who you are. It's essential to prioritize your own well-being and not compromise your authenticity for the sake of external validation. If this particular connection doesn't develop into a romantic relationship, it doesn't diminish your worth or potential for meaningful connections in the future.

Lastly, give yourself the grace to learn and grow from each experience. It's okay to feel vulnerable and to have moments of self-doubt, but it's essential to recognize your strengths and embrace the journey of self-discovery.

In the end, your happiness and fulfillment come from within, and building a relationship with yourself is the foundation for building healthy connections with others.