Crush on a popular guy, and I feel unconfident and jealous a lot

[LittlePixie]

There is one guy in my college class who I have been crushing on for a few months now, but I am not sure how to approach him well enough.
One thing that actually feels problematic is that he is extremely good-looking - like, off-the-charts supermodel good-looking - and this is a problem partly because it makes it difficult for me to relax when I am around him, and partly because there are so many other girls who orbit him and flirt with him all the time.
They alwayss give him tender looks, and a lot of them seem genuinely in love with him, and they often think of excuses to spend time with him.
But it's not just his looks that I am drawn to:
I have talked to him a few times, and even sat alone with him while we have waited for classes to start when we have arrived there first, and every time I have talked to him he has struck me as wonderfully likeable and charming - but the other girls immediately start distracting him and starting conversations with him when they arrive, and this makes me feel very unnoticed by him, and it is quite discouraging.
It also makes me wonder why he would pay attention to me, since he has all those pretty and elegant girls who try their best to charm him all the time.
I am fairly sure that he is straight, since some of his male friends have told me that, but he seems to be quite wary around girls who flirt with him too much.

Do you know how I can do here?
He seems like a really really beautiful guy, but I always feel jealous and insecure like this around him, and I feel like he has already got all kinds of approaches from the other girls.

[David]

It's completely understandable that approaching someone you're crushing on can be nerve-wracking, especially when they seem to be surrounded by a horde of admirers. First things first, take a deep breath. You've got this, and I'm here to help you navigate through this tricky terrain.

Let's start with the fact that your crush is drop-dead gorgeous. It's okay to be a little awestruck by someone's looks, but remember, beauty is subjective, and it's just one layer of a person. You've already noticed his likeable and charming personality, which is fantastic. It's essential to see beyond the external and appreciate the person for who they are.

Now, the challenge of approaching him while dealing with the flock of admirers. It might feel overwhelming, but here's the thing – you have something special to offer that those other girls might not. Your genuine connection and the time you've spent talking and getting to know him a bit. That's a unique foundation to build on.

Next time you're waiting for class together, subtly express your interest. Compliment him on something other than his looks – maybe his sense of humor, his intelligence, or the interesting conversations you've had. This can help set you apart from the crowd and show that you appreciate him on a deeper level.

As for the other girls vying for his attention, it's crucial not to let their presence diminish your self-worth. Remember, you bring something unique to the table. Confidence is attractive, so hold your head high and believe in your own value. When you engage with him, be present and authentic. Don't be afraid to share a bit about yourself or express your thoughts and feelings.

If you find that the other girls are consistently interrupting your conversations, consider finding a more private setting to chat. Suggest grabbing a coffee or studying together in a quieter place. This allows you both to focus on each other without the constant distractions.

Jealousy and insecurity are natural emotions, especially in situations like these. However, try to channel those feelings into positive energy. Instead of dwelling on what others are doing, focus on what you can bring to the connection. Celebrate your own qualities and remember that your uniqueness is what makes you stand out.

Lastly, when it comes to his interactions with other girls, try not to overanalyze. People have different comfort levels with flirting, and it doesn't necessarily indicate a deeper connection. If he's cautious around girls who flirt too much, that might be a sign that he values genuine connections over superficial attention.

In the end, building a connection takes time, and it's okay to take things slow. Be patient, be yourself, and trust that if there's a genuine connection, it will naturally grow. You've got qualities that make you special, and someone as wonderful as you deserves to be noticed.

Believe in yourself, and good luck!

[Anthonia]

I understand that having a crush on someone can be both exciting and nerve-wracking, especially when there are other people who also seem interested in them. It's completely normal to feel a bit insecure or unsure about how to approach someone you're attracted to, but remember that you have your own unique qualities that can make you stand out. Let's explore some strategies that may help you navigate this situation.

First, it's important to focus on building your confidence. Remember that you have qualities that make you special and likable. Instead of comparing yourself to others, embrace your own strengths and unique attributes. Confidence is attractive, and when you feel good about yourself, it can positively impact your interactions with others.

When it comes to approaching the person you're interested in, take a genuine and authentic approach. Instead of trying to compete with the other girls or mimic their behavior, be yourself. Engage in conversations with him naturally and show a sincere interest in getting to know him better. Ask open-ended questions about his interests, hobbies, or thoughts on various topics. Active listening is important too, as it shows that you value his opinions and perspectives.

While it's true that he may receive attention from other girls, it doesn't mean that he's not open to meeting new people or forming connections. Sometimes, people can feel overwhelmed or even turned off by constant attention or excessive flirting. By being genuine and respectful, you have the opportunity to stand out from the crowd and show him that you appreciate his qualities beyond just his looks.

Consider finding common interests or activities that you both enjoy. This can create opportunities for spending more time together in a relaxed setting. For example, if you discover that you both enjoy a particular sport or hobby, you could suggest doing it together or joining a related club or group. Shared experiences can help deepen your connection and provide a natural context for getting to know each other better.

It's important to be patient and not rush things. Relationships take time to develop, and it's okay to start as friends and let things progress naturally. While it's natural to feel a bit jealous or insecure when you see other people showing interest in him, try to focus on building your own connection with him rather than worrying about others. Remember, he may be attracted to qualities and characteristics that are unique to you.

Lastly, keep in mind that rejection is a possibility in any romantic pursuit. While it can be disheartening, it's important not to take it personally. Everyone has their own preferences and attractions, and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you if someone doesn't reciprocate your feelings. If things don't work out, try to remain positive and open to other possibilities. Sometimes, the right person comes along when we least expect it.

In summary, approaching someone you have a crush on can be intimidating, but by focusing on building your confidence, being genuine, and finding common interests, you can increase your chances of forming a connection. Remember to be patient, stay true to yourself, and be open to the possibility that things may not always go as planned. Good luck, and I hope things work out positively for you!

[LittlePixie]

Thanks, I will try asking him if he wants to meet when I see him now on Monday.
Some of his friends have told me that he has always been viewed as a great guy, and that he has a very good reputation among everyone who knows him, so do you think it is fine to be alone with him, if we end up going home to him or home to me when we spend time together?
I think that it would be very hard to resist that, if it happened, haha.