I Feel like I'm Going to Pee Just before Orgasm

[Victoria]

If I feel like I'm going to pee just b4 orgasm, everyone says "don't worry, you won't pee". I hate to tell you but that's not always true. whether I'm having sex with a man or a woman (penetration or oral) I have to go to pee 2-3 times b4 I orgasm. Yes, imagine it...you're penetrating your woman, having a great time and then she says "can u hold on a minute honey cause I have to pee!

Honestly, I fucking dread it!

Turns out, one of my close friends has the same problem.
So I'll never get to actually LET GO cause I usually do pee!
Any advice for this strange dilemma, cause I feel like a freak."

[Nicolas]

You bring up a lot of questions and issues and I'm going to talk about a lot of them...

First of all... those people who say "don't worry, you won't pee," are indeed MIS-INFORMED!

Yep, a woman is fully capable of peeing while having an orgasm. The myth that they can't is from the perfectly true fact that MEN CANNOT pee when coming.

But there is nothing physiological in women that prevents it from happening.

However, letting go is still not such terrible advice. (More on THAT below).

Second... I don't need to "imagine" making love to a woman and having her need to get up to pee, because I can simply remember the many, many times it's happened.

It is extremely common because of a group of glands called the intra-urethral glands that drip fluid nto the urethra during heightened arousal.

Typically women will clench their urethral opening (pee hole) and fluid will gather in the urethra causing it to either balloon (giving you powerful urgency to pee), or it will flow backwards up into the bladder...which will also, eventually, make you want to pee.

Either way, the fluid that comes out when you go pee is not pee... or at least only a small percentage of it is.

Think about this scientifically for a moment... if you are getting up over and over again to pee during sex... unless you're talking about needing an hour of penetration to reach orgasm (and I'm pretty darn sure that's not the case!), or you're drinking a gallon of water right before sex, then you must recognize that you kidneys could not possibly work that fast to refill your bladder.

You can test this by simply not having any water for two hours prior to intercourse, and then emptying you bladder right before you hop into bed.

I think you'll find you have the same urgency, just as quickly... reason being... it's NOT pee.

Third... Your whole sex life would change on a dime, and you would be enjoying so much more relaxed and pleasurable intimacy, if you just took the following advice very, very seriously:

Take some time to make a deep inquiry into these statements you made above, "I fucking dread it!" and "I feel like a freak."

Journal about it.

Ask yourself why.

Ask yourself if it serves you.

Ask yourself if it serves your partner.

Ask yourself what it says about you that you feel this way.

And most importantly, ask yourself who you would be if you didn't dread it, if you didn't feel like a freak... if it was just... perfectly... okay.

The fact is, sometimes women get up to pee during sex. You could agonize about it, or you could laugh about it and realize that all it does is prolong

the intimacy. Taking breaks is nice. It's only your mental frame on it that makes it into some freakish dread thing.

So, yeah, "just let go, baby."

Let go of the dread.

Let go of the feeling like a freak.

Let go of the idea that there is ANYTHING wrong.

Let go of the idea that there is a RIGHT way out there... because there really isn't!

Let go of wondering what he thinks about it (because he will think whatever you tell him to think... and right now you are telling him with all of your anxiety that there is something wrong).

Let go of being angry with your body.

And then...

Make space for some humor, self-compassion, self-acceptance, and the idea that two people making love is much bigger than whether or not you get up to pee.

And Finally...

Let's talk about REALLY "letting go."

What is really going to happen?

Well... I'll give you a hint:

You're going to want to put down some towels.

If you have recently emptied your bladder and then as you become aroused you feel a strong desire to pee... what would happen if you didn't get up and stop the action?

What if you let that arousal keep building?

What if you kept coming closer to orgasm and the intensity of needing to pee kept getting stronger?

What if you let yourself go in that moment and let the arousal keep building as you let whatever happens happen?

Well... you would, indeed, have a lot of fluid exit your urethra.

Yep... you and partner are going to get wet.

And you would also have the orgasm of your life!

And if you bothered to actually smell the fluid that came out, I think you'd notice quite immediately...

That stuff ain't pee.

There's no ammonia smell to it. It's clear.

It's intra-urethra fluid, and you just experienced female ejaculation.

Congratulations... You're not a freak, you're gifted.

You might want to try this first alone to convince yourself that I'm telling the truth.

Then warn your partner in advance.

Put down some towels and prepare to THRILL your man with your abilities.

Women pay me money to learn how to do that.

You have it naturally to SQUIRT!

[Victoria]

Thank you for your insight Nicolas, I'm indeed grateful.

[Lost 73]

I agree with Nick,

I to have experienced this and it is truly amazing both orally and with intercourse. the ability to do this is rare. Enjoy it let the feeling totally go and your eyes will roll back into your head and the orgasm will be epic.
The first this happened I thought the same thing but being a guy didn't bother me. But I made there was a towel around for the next time.