The Psychological Aspect of Men Experiencing Erectile Dysfunction?

[Evelyn]

I need someone to share some insight on the psychological aspect of men experiencing Erectile Dysfunction? My boyfriend is having problems with his erections and it is getting him down.
And I am worried it has something to with me. And it is effecting our relationship.

I read an articles some time back about how depression and stress can affect sex life. Can you give me some insight?

[Malvin]

First. Just to go on record before we dive in: There are very good medical reasons a guy could be having trouble "performing," especially as he gets older. If a guy is having "consistent" trouble both when he's with a partner and when he's alone he should consult a doctor to see what's going on.

Not to alarm you but I do recommend you ask you husband to go see your Doctor and get a medical check up as soon as possible!

But now that I have said that . . .Lets deal with your question.

The Psychological Reasons

Penises have a mind of their own and guys have no control over when they do (or they don't) get an erection (as much as we'd like to - thank science for Viagra.)

I don't mind talking about it, but I can personally think of several occasions in the past where I've been insanely turned on. Where I've wanted to pounce on a woman, take her and ravage her. . . where my whole being DESIRED a woman with an overwhelming, crushing WANT . . .

And frump....Nothing!

My penis has hung there like a dead worm on the end of a hook. It was as much use as trying to play pool with a piece of string!

And it totally, utterly sucked.

For a guy not being able to "perform" with a woman isn't just embarrassing, it's devastating to his ego and self esteem.

So let's quickly cover some of the psychological reasons a guy may not be able to "get it up" . . .

And then we'll talk about the "proper" way handle it without jumping to conclusions about how he feels about you.

5 Simple Reasons For Temporary Erectile Dysfunction

1. He's Nervous.

Number one hard on killer in the world . . .

"Ok, ok. I need to impress this girl. Don't mess this up. If you rock her world she'll be yours forever. If you don't she'll giggle at you behind your back and all of her friends will know you as 'the noodle.' Just . . . oh no. Oh, come on!!"

2. He's Not In The Mood.

Guys are humans. Sometimes we'd rather watch football. It's a myth that men can get an erection just at the sight of a naked woman. We like to get in the mood too Robin. And it's nice to be "Seduced" by a woman!

3. Depression.

It's hard to celebrate life with a woman when all you want to do is crawl under the covers and retreat from life. This is a serious one Robin and I do recommend a visit to the doctor and a frank discussion to see if he needs to undertake any "Therapy!"

4. Stress.

"Oh, god. How am I going to pay the mortgage? The car is being repossessed tomorrow. My boss hates me. My children don't respect me. I think my wife is cheating on me . . .Wait. She's looking at me. She's reaching for my pants. She's doing that thing she does with her tongue. Maybe if I use the Visa to pay off the MasterCard I can . . . OK, think of something sexy. Anything sexy. Oh no. Oh no!!"

Stress and worry is a huge erection killer Robin....Simply because your mind is just not in the right place. Can you see where I am going here.....Mental stuff...In the Mind!

5. Fear of Rejection

"Why is she looking at me like that? Does she want to have sex? Maybe she wants to have sex. But wait a minute, I thought she wanted to have sex last week and it turned out she just wanted a back rub. Why are women so complicated!!!"

What is his self-esteem like, it can be a downward spiral Robin. Your worried, he gets even more worried and you worry even more.........Pressure, pressure, pressure..........No erection!

And here's a bonus . . .

6. He doesn't feel respected by the woman he's with.

it's really hard for a guy to "feel like a man" if he's consistently feels he is like a boy. Now you say you are "worried" Robin. But what is your attitude and behaviour about "his" problem?

Now, if you look at these 6 reasons you'll notice two that aren't included:

"He's not attracted to me."

and

"He doesn't love me."

Is it POSSIBLE those are the reasons?

Sure.

But in my experience they're pretty far down the list.

Men don't need to be in love with a woman to want to sleep with her (being in love with a woman can actually make it HARDER to sleep with her.)

And most guys don't need to be THAT attracted to a girl to want to take her to bed.

So it's PROBABLY not about you (unless you have a really, really horrible relationship.)

So how do you HANDLE it if there's no "air in the hose?"

With gentleness, understanding and humor.

The WORST thing you can do if a guy can't perform is make it a big deal or make it about YOU and how he feels about you.

Treat it like it's "not a big deal." Kiss him. Give him a massage. Make him feel safe and wanted and sexy.

Once the pressure's off, you might be surprised what "arises." Smiles

Before I finish up this e mail to you Robin I am going to share a story from My own life. This is going back a few years now.

I met this very hot and attractive blond and there was most certainly "Chemistry" between us. And there was no doubt in my mind I was going to "Seduce" her.

Well I did and we ended up in bed together.

It got hot...Steamy....Passionate!

But I could not get an erection and she noticed and asked me what was wrong. I looked at her, and looked down at my limp cock and smiled. Remember what I said above "It's as much use as trying to play pool with a piece of string"....

That's exactly what I said to her.

And she burst out laughing and so did I...It took the pressure of and I relaxed.

Needless to say that after about twenty minutes of gentle kissing and caressing and giving her orgasms. I was fully erect and we enjoyed a Great afternoon together.

The problem was I had put to much "pressure" on my self.

The humour broke the stress.

Stop worrying Robin, it will take the stress and worry of him knowing you are cool and relaxed.

If you or your partner would like My help.

Then please feel free to contact me.

[Anthony]

Many men are worried about erectile dysfunction, and go to great pains to ensure top-notch penis care in an effort to avoid the problem. In most cases of erectile dysfunction, there is a physical component; for example, a man might suffer from diabetes, circulation issues or other problems that can be addressed by a physician.

But for some men, there appears to be no physical problem at all - other than the fact that he just can't get it up when it's time to get busy. This can be quite distressing, because at least men with penis problems caused by a medical condition know there is likely a good treatment to help them. But those who have penis problems with no clear cause may be quite worried about what this means for their long-term sexual health.

Those who have penis problems with no clear physical reason might start to wonder: Is erectile dysfunction actually a psychological issue?

Penis problems and psychology

In some cases, a man's erectile dysfunction is caused by something other than a physical issue. Here are a few reasons why a guy might experience penis problems that seem to make no sense.

1. Stress. Most men go through periods of serious stress from time to time. This might include everything from a big presentation at work to dealing with the stress of losing a loved one. In cases like this, everything else in life can fall to the wayside for a while, including sexual desire and the ability to engage in sexual activity.

2. Anxiety. Much more than simple stress, anxiety can lead to physical problems that eventually cause penis problems. Those who suffer from anxiety might have higher blood pressure, increased heart rate, and debilitating fatigue. These problems can make it tough to get it up when the time comes.

3. Depression. This often goes hand-in-hand with anxiety. A guy suffering from depression might not care about things that once mattered to him, including his sexual health. Even if a man feels sexual desire, he might have trouble acting on it. In many cases, treatment for depression will quickly result in a resolution of penis problems.

4. Worries about erectile dysfunction. Interestingly, a man who is worried about developing penis problems is much more likely to do just that! Worries about erectile dysfunction can combine stress, anxiety and even depression into one big concern, and that might be enough to keep a man from getting it up at all.

5. Relationship issues. Sometimes the problem isn't about the sexual function or desire, but about the partner. A man who is in the midst of serious relationship problems might find it very difficult to perform in the bedroom. In addition, some emotions are sneaky, and a man might not want to confront them; for instance, feeling guilt over something in the relationship, not fully trusting a partner, or feeling resentment for a slight can manifest physically, preventing a man from getting hard when the time calls for it.

The good news is that psychological issues that lead to penis problems can be resolved. It might take the help of a good psychologist or therapist, but soon a man can get to the bottom of what is causing the lack of desire or lack of physical ability. Once he knows what the problem is, he can work toward fixing it.

[Michael]

Watching porn may banish erections during intercourse, but is the brain or the manhood really the problem?

Most men don't think they are even looking at that much porn, but can't really figure out what else it might be. Alcohol cannot be a part to play if erection issues still exist whilst sober. Many may wonder why a perfectly healthy guy in his sexual peek, with an attractive partner, can suddenly be dealing with erection issues.

This, unfortunately, is a question that is being asked more and more, indicating that erectile dysfunction is no longer an issue that mainly affects men over 50. It is now affecting men of all ages across the globe. We now have a generation of younger men who are in search of that miracle blue pill solution.

What Is Erectile Dysfunction?

Erectile Dysfunction is a sexual dysfunction that affects millions of men just in the US alone. This issue occurs when a man is unable to maintain or achieve an erection before intercourse. There are two categories that cause erectile dysfunction: physical and physiological links.

Physical health issues can be the most likely cause of erectile dysfunction, particularly in older men. Diseases such as obesity, diabetes and high blood pressure are often linked with problems in the bedroom. Adopting a healthy lifestyle is the best way to avoid these type of ED issues. For younger men, ED can often be caused by psychological issues like stress, anxiety or depression or poor sexual experiences. Porn can desensitize the brain from normal sexual arousal.

Erectile Dysfunction and Porn Often Go Hand in Hand

There is a new scientific term called porn induced erectile dysfunction. This happens when a person has used so much porn that they no longer want to enjoy or carry out regular sexual intercourse. Many men for example can:

1. Get super hard when looking at porn, but when they are with a real woman struggle to get and maintain an erection.

2. Think about porn when having sex with their wife or partner.

Very simply put, men who use a lot of porn are much more likely to suffer from ED symptoms than men who don't use it. These days, porn is readily available. It all free, easy to view within seconds, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Pornography can have a negative effect on a man's brain and sex conditioning. This means some men do not desire from sex in real life, because it doesn't provide the fantasy expectations they have become so familiar with.

Treatments

Drugs such as Viagra can help a man overcome psychological issues and boost confidence. However, the only solution for porn is to give up pornography for a period of two- three months. This will help your brain to reboot from the influx of dopamine and sexual fantasy and prevent losing response to pleasure even further.

The good news is that porn-induced erectile dysfunction is treatable. There are ample natural male enhancement or better libido advertisements promising men a better sex drive and improved erections and vitality.

Well, it gets many men thinking, especially if they are unhappy with their sex lives and simply looking for products to help. If your sexual issue has to do with the physical functioning of your manhood, then these might help. Reversing erection issues is possible, but it requires stopping the behavior rather than turning to pills.

If your brain isn't turned on, neither is your manhood, this is the final reality. Why not try stopping the porn first, looking at ways to enhance your sex life further too? For erectile dysfunction help, simple lifestyle changes, improved diet and vitamins can be beneficial.

[Evelyn]

Thank you everyone for the advice.

[EDDoctorOnline]

If you have troubles getting an erection or you can’t maintain it until you or your partner is satisfied, you may have ed. Men are often confused that the morning erections have a link with arousal, but it isn’t actually. However, it occurs because your brain releases less noradrenaline—a hormone responsible for non-stop erections during sleep. Men with ED aren’t attracted to their partners as much as they used to, and it might happen due to low-T. Other erectile dysfunction symptoms include high blood pressure or cholesterol levels, medication changes, swollen gums, and insomnia.