Why God Why(sex)

[Sexbumponalog]

Hi. Im 26 yrs old my name is cierria. I have been dating and having sex since 23. My husband and I have been together for 3 yrs. He always orgasmed but I never have. I only had sex with 2 men before him once...didnt orgasm. Hell...I cant even make myself orgasm. My selfesteem aint the best but I don't think Im ugly...I try to think about sexy things. Why the fuck cant I come??? That is my natural born right soon as I hit puberty like what the fuck...is it because I dont do large amounts of drugs while I have sex...is it because I dont eat aphordesiac food? Please...telll me why I can not feel this pleasure that everyone and the fucking rest of the world is feeling. I dont wanna die without knowing what good sex feel s like. Some people say you gotta kiss and feel into it, or role play . im not good at role play and we dont caress we just get right to it. I dont know if itd help. Its like I have 0 turn ons...and no his penis is not small when hard.

[Sexbumponalog]

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[bunnyhabit]

The inability to have an orgasm falls under the category of Female Sexual Dysfunction of which there are five main problems: low libido or hypoactive sexual desire disorder, painful sex, sexual arousal disorder, an aversion to sex and the inability to orgasm. In fact, 10 to 20% of all women have never experienced one. Other causes may be depression, anxiety, lack of privacy, medication side effects, medical conditions such as endometriosis or arthritis, menopausal symptoms or a history of physical or sexual abuse. I suggest a medical and emotional examination to determine the causes of your failure to be able to orgasm. It is truly the best feeling you will ever experience.

[Shirley]

Some women, climaxing and reaching orgasm isn’t so easy. You see, there’s a significant mental component to making yourself orgasm.

For many women, there can be mental obstacles or blocks that can prevent you from fully relaxing and letting go, which makes climaxing and having an orgasm tough, and sometimes impossible. Overcoming these problems will make reaching orgasm much, much easier. These are the mental obstacles I’m talking about:

Stress – Stress is an obvious one. Of course, it’s going to be difficult to get aroused and feel sexual when feeling stressed about work, your kids or any other major problem. But a lack of physical and emotional intimacy can lead you to feel stressed the next day.

Solution – Stress is a natural part of life, which we often can’t avoid. However, if every day of your life is incredibly stressful, then perhaps you need to take a step back, reassess and find some time to meditate or exercise or to simply have some “me time” so you can destress.

Also, studies have shown that having sex lowers stress the following day…and if you’re less stressed the following day you’re more likely to have sex…it’s a virtuous cycle! So, sex can actually act as a de-stressing exercise for you and your man, in turn making it easier to orgasm.

Stressing About The Outcome – A funny thing happens when you stress out about trying to have an orgasm…studies have shown that getting stressed out about reaching orgasm correlates with difficulty achieving orgasm and makes it take longer too. In other words, you can end up becoming so anxious and worried about whether you are using the right technique to orgasm that you stop focusing on what feels pleasurable and enjoyable.

Solution – Although this sounds counter-intuitive, you need to stop focusing on having an orgasm every time you masturbate or have sex. Instead, you need to focus on what feels most pleasurable. So experiment with different techniques and positions to see what you enjoy the most. As you do, you’ll notice that you naturally get closer and closer to orgasming.

Feeling pressure to perform – Feeling that you have to “perform” for your man or that he is watching you and judging you during sex, can make you clam up. This ultimately makes it much harder to let go and orgasm.

Solution – Talk to your man. Let him know what you need to feel comfortable and relaxed during sex. Once you talk to him, you may even find that he feels the same amount of pressure to perform for you.

It’s funny, guys often feel as much, if not more pressure to perform during sex. They worry about the size of their penis, maintaining their erection, preventing premature ejaculation, making sure you have a good time, whether or not you like their body and more.

Often, you’ll find that your guy is so worried about himself, that he isn’t even that focused on how you’re “performing”.

Body Confidence – If you don’t feel comfortable with your body, then you may feel self-conscious and out of the moment, which is obviously going to make it hard to feel sexy.

Solution – Giving you advice on how to become more comfortable with your body is difficult, but I can say that once you begin to accept your yourself for who are, you will find yourself becoming less self-conscious and notice that it becomes easier to reach orgasm.

Sexual Shame – If you’ve had a negative sexual experience in the past or were raised to believe that having sexual feelings and desires was wrong, then you may be dealing with some sexual shame. This sexual shame can act like a weight on your mind preventing you from fully letting go and orgasming.

Solution – Dealing with sexual shame can be as easy as noticing it when it arises and then consciously telling yourself that the feeling you are having (the sexual shame) is something that should be ignored. However, sometimes sexual shame runs a lot deeper, and you’ll need to talk to a licensed counselor or therapist to help you get rid of it.

Not Knowing Your Body – Knowing your body, what it responds to and what feels good is vital to learning how to make yourself orgasm. Once you know the right buttons to press to get yourself aroused and turned on, you’ll find that having an orgasm is super easy.

Solution – Experiment. To learn what your body likes best, you need to experiment and try out new things to see what your body responds to. You may find that nipple stimulation, anal masturbation, being submissive or softly brushing your clit in a certain way quickly brings you to the edge.

If you can overcome the above mental blocks, you will find reaching orgasm to be far, far easier.

Orgasm Assistance

You don’t just have your use your hands to have an orgasm. And there is a bunch of things you can do to enhance your experience.

VIBRATORS

There is a massive range of different vibrators that you can use to help bring yourself to orgasm. If you are currently having a lot of trouble reaching orgasm using only your fingers, then you should think about using a vibrator. Vibrator users have also been shown to have better sexual function than non-users so keep that in mind if you are on the fence about purchasing one.

DILDOS

If you adore penetration, and it helps you get closer to orgasm, then you should definitely consider using a dildo when trying to make yourself orgasm. Just like with vibrators, they come in all shapes and sizes, so you can find one that hits all the right spots.

FANTASY

Fantasy sounds like quite a general topic as there is a massive range of fantasies that you might have. Whatever they are, you will find it much easier to orgasm if you indulge in them. So if there is an actor or famous person that you adore, try watching a video of him while you masturbate yourself. You can also listen to a recording of him or even a song. If there is a good piece of erotica that gets you going, then have a read of it.

Different people have different fantasies which is totally normal. Try indulging yours while masturbating. You’ll find that when you do, it’s a lot easier to bring yourself to orgasm.