Need Help Please

[Jamlals7]

Hi all,

First time here, but sometimes its better turning to online help rather than friends.

My wife and I are currently in a long distance relationship as she wanted to go back to school to achieve what she has always wanted to. I was and am very supportive of that, and to be honest I am paying over 80% if the bills and mortgage which I do not mind because I want to be supportive as I can.

She had to move into a new place so I was trying to help her out. Originally, one of my co-workers knows someone where she is currently living, and she needed help finding movers. I had everything set, but then the person who was going to be helping called me and said they do not have a closed truck it is a pick-up flat bed. I told her that and she said she did not want an open truck which could ruin her items. So I looked online and found someone for a reasonable price to do the move.

Today, he was supposed to meet her at 10:30 but was running late and came an hour later. She was already pissed of at that. I had communicated with the mover for the past 3 days for the time and location via text message and phone, trying to do as much as I can from the city I live in. Her walk through was supposed to be at noon, but I know from the movers showing up she would be later. When I called her to check if they were there she said they just got here and hung up. I messaged her apologizing that they were late, and I was arranging for her couch to be steam cleaned, so told her to let me know when everything is up and the guy will come do it. She messaged me back saying the mover is alone and f**k off to me. I told her I spoke with the mover an hour before he got there and said he had a helper. So not sure what happened there. Then she said "you didn't do everything you could", "don't fing care", followed by "I'm tired of you".

I messaged her back saying sorry again, and I did ask him if he has help, followed up with him for time, and even have messages. I know I am not the greatest husband as we have had a few falling out but I do not think I deserved this. I know she is going into exams and is stressed and from where I live I am trying to do much as I can,

On top of that, her cousin is having his birthday at my house, and wanted to invite her sister, and asked me. I know we are not on talking terms with her sisters and family as they have been disrespectful towards her and I stand by her. I called her yesterday to communicate this as in this situation I do not want to make any decision. The end result was I tol her cousin that listen this is the situation and we are not on talking terms and he told her it was cancelled. But she still got upset at me saying she doesn't need this stress, and I am stressing her out because I was stressed about the situation.

I know she is stressed about the move and exams and I am doing what I can.

I would love some advice if possible.

Thanks,

J

[bunnyhabit]

you are babying her way overboard so she is treating you as slave rather than a boyfriend. ignore her until she apologizes for her behavior. you need to be man up with her as an equal partner . she will stray to a more manly guy if you continue to take her abuse as you are now. it is one thing to support your partner and another thing to become an abused partner.

[Dennis]

I think you shoud give her time to calm down. She has probably said those things to you because she was angry, and like she said stressed out. So allow her calm down, you can then tell her how she hurt you with her words when things have calmed down. Also, it's good to be nice to your wife but don't allow her order you around.